Posted by Major General Charles Tenkiller (Vice Commandant, Colonial Customs and Defense Agency) in I’m All the Family You Got

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Sharah Fayth (Chief Star Fleet Medical Officer) in I’m All the Family You Got

Posted by Major General Charles Tenkiller (Vice Commandant, Colonial Customs and Defense Agency) in I’m All the Family You Got
Posted by… suppressed (14) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
Sharah looked over her shoulder at Abby, “Doctors, researchers, people who thought I was an interesting specimen to ‘study’.” She turned back to the screen and finished typing and then submitted the report she was working on. She turned fully to face Abby then and leaned a hip against the counter. “From a fatal medical condition I have. Don’t worry, it’s not contagious.”

Sharah

Abby’s eyes narrowed. “Fatal?” She paused. “Fatal how? Does Chuck know?”

Abby

“Yes, he and Yavia both know. Though they are both convinced I will beat the odds.” Sharah sighed. “Perhaps I will, I have so far. Half the people with my condition die in infancy, the rest in early childhood. Only a handful of us ever survive to adulthood.”

Sharah

Abby kept her eyes on Sharah. “What is the condition? And why do you think you won’t beat it?”

Abby

“They call it ‘super-sensitivity’. As you know, I can hear thoughts. What it means is that I have an absolutely incredible range if distance and frequencies. It also means I can never ignore it, never turn it off. I have an over production of psilosynine in my brain and a hyper active paracortex. Eventually the hyper activity and high levels of chemical will short circut my neural pathways and cause a massive seizure and I will die.” She crossed her arms over herself, “I don’t know that I won’t beat it, I don’t know that I will. There isn’t enough research or knowledge about it. We are so small a part of the population, it isn’t worth the resources to research a cure.”

Sharah

Abby leaned forward and looked at Sharah. “You mean… because there are so few of you and something bad is happening, it’s better to just study what is happening than to try and save you. And maybe ‘your kind’ would be better off as a history lesson instead of a living, breathing embodiment of something special.” Her head tilted to side slightly and she looked very much like Charles in her expression of mild sarcasm. “You don’t say?”

Abigail Tenkiller

“It started out that way. We could go into the reasons and limitations of centuries past, but in essence, exactly that.” She unfolded her arms and stood up and stared at Abby. “Now though, they do not wish to relagate us to a paragraph in history, they want to erase us. Because not so long ago, someone like me, was evil. Truly evil, Abby. Why? I have no idea, but he was a serial killer the likes of you can’t imagine. Because he was evil and dangerous, now they would rather everyone like me should die and be forgotten, because they are afraid of what he did.”

Sharah

Abby looked at Sharah for a long time, obviously pondering something very complex and important. “Is that why you joined Star Fleet? To escape that mentality?”

Abigail Tenkiller

Sharah laughed, but it wasn’t humor, more irony. “In part. The first person to really accept me was a human science officer. He wasn’t afraid of me. He tried to help me even just a little bit. So I joined Star Fleet thinking I would find more acceptance if not friendship. More selfishly, I had also hoped that since there was no help there, I would find answers elsewhere.”

Sharah

“Did you find answers?” Abby asked, obviously seeing Sharah through a different lens. “Or did you just find more of the same? More judgement and people being afraid of you?”

Abigail Tenkiller

“Some of everything. There are always other Betazoids around, and they know instantly what I am. They feel obligated to warn others. Despite the many tele/empathic species in the Federation many still see us as witches. I have biyearly level 4 security screenings. There are people who would use me as a tool, a machine for their own agendas.” Sharah dropped her hands to her sides. “I have found more questions than I have answers. I understand myself a little better but not enough. I have friends for the first time in my life. Real friends, and not just people fascinated for a time. I have a psychiatrist who actually works to make connections with me and help me, not just go through the motions. And I have two really incredible people in my life. They are bright and unique and amazing people. They aren’t afraid, and they don’t care how quirky I am, they not only gave me a home but they want me in it. I love them and I thank the four gods for them every day.”

Sharah

Abigail was quiet for a long time. Then she said “You think less of yourself because you are special; and others wish they were. I’m the opposite side of that. I wish I was special, but I’m not. And worse, I’m not normal either.” and she looked down at her hands and busied herself with picking at the blanket.

“I am not normal, but I am not special in the way you mean it.” Sharah shrugged. “I am what I am. I have spent my whole life trying to be normal. I have finally started at accept I never will be, and it is very lonely.” She stared intently at Abby. “You know something of that.”

“I used to be, you know.” Abby said. “When I was younger. I had a gift. I could sense what people felt, knew instinctively how to help them feel better. I started learning about traditional medicines and ways to heal. I was looked up to. People came to me for help.” and she sighed heavily. “And then came Charles. From the time he was born he was something else. And everyone loved him. And then Mary. And Mary was special… like you. Her gifts were so much greater than mine. She could everything I could by five that I could do at fourteen… and more.” She dropped the blanket and looked up at the ceiling. “I’m such a waste…”

Abigail

“No, you are not.” Her voice was like velvet over steel. “You still have it. I could feel it when you first arrived. All those who came before you, speak through you. You felt it too.” Sharah’s gaze turned intently curious. “Things like your gift don’t simply go away suddenly. Were you ill or injured when it started?” She walked over to the bed and flipped on a couple of extra monitors and began neurological and physiological scans of her head. She sat down on the edge of the bed and took her hand. “It is not our gifts that make us special, it is what we do with it that does.” Her other hand touched over Abby’s heart, “How we let thus guide us, that gives us purpose and uniquness. You have not lost that.”

Sharah

Abby shook her head. “You don’t get it. You won’t get it. You will never know what it’s like to not be the best at something. To be unique… special… only for a moment.” She looked at Sharah and then said “You don’t know how good you have it. You can only see what you never had. I had it and then I was no longer as good… as useful… as special. Nothing changed in me. What changed is who I was compared against. You won’t ever have that problem, now will you?”

Abby Tenkiller

“No, for I will always be compared to what is normal and found lacking, an abomination, a monster. I will always be compared to a serial killer and a man too weak to act. The more ambitious will see me as a tool to be used, but still feared if others had control of me. I will never know what it is for people to accept me for who I am. I will live knowing that my death will be painful, violent, and physically hurt others when it happens. And you will never have that problem will you?” Sharah shook her head. “You have to stop comparing yourself to others, Abby. It’s hard, I know. I struggle with that every day. I’m not very good at it. But you only see what you think you lost and not what you still have. We will never walk each other’s paths, but that doesn’t mean we are enemies and that we can’t support each other along those paths.”

Sharah

Abby looked at her for a moment and then said “So how is it you can tell me to stop doing something you do too? Seems pretty hypocritical, don’t ya think?”

Abby

Sharah laughed softly, “It does seem so, doesn’t it? But maybe because I recognize the same frustration and sadness in you that I feel. Not caused by the same circumstances, but the same resulting feelings. Who better to recieve advice and understanding from than someone who faces a similar struggle?”

Sharah

“Maybe.” Abigail said. “But I don’t see a ton of similarities between you and me. People may hate you, but at least they are still thinking about you. You’re not… forgotten about.”

Abigail Tenkiller

Well so much for trying to connect with her on a personal level. “No one has forgotten you, Abby. Charles has always been proud of you. He brags about you all the time. He has the shirt you made him in his office and he tells everyone how you and your mom made it and what each piece represents, why you chose it. He talks all the time about how you carry on the tribe’s traditions and culture. You keep the Osage alive. You inspired him to embrace all things Osage. He wants to be like you.”

Sharah

Abby stared at Sharah, disbelief plain on her face. “Bullshit.” she said. “That… that’s not true. You’re just… that’s a lie.” Her words were said firmly… but it was obvious she wasn’t trying to convince Sharah.

Abigail Tenkiller

“I. Don’t. Lie. I have no reason to lie to you.” Sharah took a moment to allow herself to feel Abby’s struggle more deeply. “You used to tell him the Osage myths as bedtime stories. He would follow you around when he was little and beg you to show him all the things in your stories. He snuck out and followed you once while you were foraging. He got ahold of some poison hemlock. It scared you to death. You and your grandmother chanted and prayed over him and gave him medicines that you made, until he was better. After that you took him with you and showed him how to forage without causing harm, how to tell the difference between safe and harmful plants, how to find water, and how to commute with nature. He drove you crazy. He was always bring home plants and insects and frogs and what not to show you what he found. He was your shadow.”

Sharah

“And then he grew.” Abby said back. “And then he became…him. And then that shadow you think you know oh so much about cast his shadow over me. He took all of that that I gave to him and built himself up. And that was good. And then Mary came along. And then… she could tell healing herbs by looking at them. She learned the prayers hearing them once. She created her first poultice at six years old ; and it works better than the one our grandmother created! She was a medicine woman at ten years old! I was twenty and still not seen as one! How do I compete with that?!? How does anyone compete with that?!”

Abigail Tenkiller

Sharah didn’t believe Abby wasn’t seen as a medicine woman. Cecil had named her one, so had Donna. “Why is it a competition?”

Sharah

“Because I deserve to be recognized too, dammit!” she yelled at Sharah. “I worked years… years to serve my people. Constantly learning, listening, practicing… decades of work and sacrifice that everyone just phbbbt… tossed away. Do they come to me for help? No. They ask where Mary is. Do they ever say ‘Hey, there is Abby Tenkiller’s brother!’?! NO. It’s ‘Charles this’ and ‘Mary that’… not one time in years has anyone said ‘We should ask Abigail.’ They ask Mary. They send messages to Chuck and he isn’t even on the same fu<%ing PLANET!!! So you tell me, Ms. I-know-everything-everyone-is-feeling… tell me how that isn’t a fu<%ing competition?!”

Abigail Tenkiller

“I didn’t say it wasn’t a competition. I asked why it was. Just because I feel things, doesn’t mean I understand the why’s of them.” Sharah said quietly. She wouldn’t raise her voice just because Abby was. “I am trying to understand, that’s all.”

Abby’s yelling brought the guard into the room. “What’s with the yelling?”

Sharah