Posted by Captain Eela Dasca (Lt. Governor) in Starfleet Complex- Rewriting Narratives

Posted by Lieutenant Tandra Mika (Counselor) in Starfleet Complex- Rewriting Narratives

Posted by Captain Eela Dasca (Lt. Governor) in Starfleet Complex- Rewriting Narratives
Posted by… suppressed (1) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)

Mika listened quietly, letting Dasca tell her entire story. It was good she was able to tell it all. And it was a lot of information to sift through. Mika took a moment to think, construct her next words, and then spoke.

“Sometimes a situation can’t be saved, sometimes all of our available options are less than ideal and we are forced to choose the better of a selection of bad options.” Mika had decided, a few months ago, that it was better to end her own relationship, than to continue a long distance relationship neither party felt that strongly about anymore. Both options had felt bad. Mika recognized though, that was vastly different than Eela and her ex husband, for a multitude of reasons. “Could this fall into a situation like that?”

“Of course,” Dasca said softly.

“Earlier, when I said it’s how we act on bad qualities that we should judge ourselves, you mentioned your leaving that situation as the wrong thing to do. Now that everything is finalized and has settled, does that still feel like the wrong choice? A bad choice? Or did it need to be done?”

~ Mika, CNS

She didn’t hesitate. “No. It was the right thing. He was never going to end it. I had to, for both our sakes. Otherwise we wouldn’t have just kept hurting each other. And the time and distance I have from all of that is what’s making me look at everything with a different perspective. But if I shouldn’t judge myself for how I acted under those circumstances, shouldn’t the same apply to him too? I’m… struggling to separate those thoughts in my head from the emotions I was feeling at the time combined with his own.” It was the complexity of empathic abilities in that it added an additional sensory layer that complicated her processing of a situation. It could add to it as much as it distracted.

~Eela Dasca, Lt. Gov.

Mika shook her head, “No. You don’t have to judge him based on that situation, either. You are allowed to remember the good, while accepting that it had to end.” She frowned, in thought, and then continued, “It’s hard for me to understand fully, the empathic side of things. But I think, to fully separate your emotions from his, will take a lot of introspection, both about how you feel about it now, and why you chose to handle it how you did then.”

~ Mika, CNS

She shifted her gaze away again, seeking something that would help her understand how to make sense of all these bits and pieces. Her hands returned to her lap and Eela sighed. Maybe she was making a big deal of nothing. Maybe it was just a bad situation. Period.

But why was she left the one ripped apart? She didn’t know how Cory was handling things right now aside from what she could glean from their call when their decree was issued. He seemed… okay? Like he knew it was the right path too. She hadn’t expected that shift in him. Hell, even their conversation the day Roger came to see her about a job opportunity (one she now currently held) had still been tense and full of needless barbs.

Except she thought about that list of false beliefs and how gutted she had felt sitting at her desk in her beautiful office. She, a woman of power and responsibility had felt like curling into a ball. They were just words, right? But they had had such a power over her and she was struggling to understand why.

~Eela Dasca, Lt. Gov.

Mika sat quietly for a while, allowing Dasca to think and stew on her own. It was, as Mika had discovered when she took her first CNS posting, a part of the job to sit quietly and let someone think. After all, what point was introspection if one did not allow time to, well, introspect? At last she spoke, politely and softly, “It will take time to sort through everything. There are a lot of complicated emotions at play and giving yourself time to feel them and think about them can only help.”

~ Mika, CNS