Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek (Communications Officer) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

(snip)

Leah was quiet for a moment. “Well, baby steps I think are the best way to go. We’re not going to jump from one conversation and hanging out, to sharing all the deepest things inside of us. Nor is it a good idea to do so with people you just meet. You have to build rapport with them, trust. So, you had one positive social engagement. Let’s use that momentum. Are there others you can do something social with? Maybe a group activity? That way the focus won’t be on you alone .”

~Leah Hart, NP

He shrugged, “Probably? but I don’t have any group activities that I enjoy, I suppose if I was invited I would enjoy it but I don’t like inviting myself into others lives.” he said thinking for a moment. “Do you have anyideas?” he asked

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

Leah gazed at him for a moment. “Do you see how that might be a self-fulfilling prophecy? You don’t want to impose on others, so you keep yourself away from them and opportunities to socialize in different ways. But then you’re waiting to be invited to something people don’t even know you want to be invited to.”

~Leah Hart, NP

He shrugged, “Maybe?” he noted. “In my culture if someone wants you to participate in an event or gathering, they will ask you, its not something that is easy for me to turn off. ” he note looking down. “It feals very wrong to me”

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

She nodded slowly. This was tricky. There was a balance between honouring one’s culture and being g open to the diversity around you. Being open to it allowed you to allow it to influence you. Some viewed as giving up on your own culture but Leah disagreed. “It’s not about setting aside your culture, Zaril. But you’re not new in Starfleet. And expecting everyone to know and understand that cultural nuance might be asking too much. Sometimes we have to be willing to teach others about the mores that guide and shape us.”

“What if you were to mention to people you work with and those your are meeting that Deltans just ask each other to participate in social events automatically, so if they are doing something you are open to the invite? Would that be a reasonable compromise?”

~Leah Hart, NP

Zaril shrugged, it was not something he was comfortable doing, if he forced himself into someone else plans, he would know that they did not really want him there. “I guess it’s if they don’t really want me there, then I will know it and it becomes unbearably uncomfortable for everyone. ” he noted. “I don’t feel like it’s a good idea.” he suggested.

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

She tilted her head and frowned a little, trying to parse exactly what his concern was. His words did not exactly counter what she had said, and she felt like there was a miscommunication or misunderstanding here.

“You don’t think it’s a good idea to share with others how things work in Deltan society?”

~Leah Hart, NP

He shrugged, “It still feels like forcing myself on them, in our culture you want you ask or show” he noted, he thought about it. “I don’t know how to explain it” he said looking down. “I want them to want me there?” is all he could think of.

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel