Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek (Communications Officer) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Side-Sim: When thoughts meet feelings

(snip)

She closed her eyes, focusing on the gentle and soothing sensation of his thumb. “Discomfort is a normal thing, and I’ve certainly had enough moments of it.”

Leah opened her eyes and let a breath fill her lungs for a moment before she continued. “If it had been just one time, I would have likely just assumed something was going on with him and try to get him to talk about it. But after several times and arguments, I just decided it wasn’t worth finding out of this was a phase. He wasn’t interested in listening when I expressed concern about his behaviour and I wasn’t going to stick around to see if it was going to get more serious. Then after I broke up with him, he showed up at Starfleet Medical trying to see me. I was friends with the receptionists of our Tower of the complex, and they knew I had ended things. He got aggressive with them and Security ended up needing to escort him out and he was banned from returning unless he happened to be working and bringing a patient in- he’s a local paramedic.” Leah could feel her heart beat pick up. “He didn’t know that was just around the corner in the admin area listening in.” That fear was so visceral, even as she tried to tamp it down. “Nothing happened after that and he left me alone, but I was scared for awhile that it wouldn’t be the end of it.”

~Leah Hart, NP

Zaril continued to listen his eyes ears and heart intent on listening to what she had to say. “It seems like your instincts were telling you the right of it, not listening to someone who care for you, is considered in our culture to be a sign of poor character. If you can’t accept correction how can one improve themselves?” he place her hand between his. “Did he mean a lot to you? you still seem to have some mixed emotions when your consider him” he noted. He pushed a little sense of comfort very subtle to take the edge of the emotions, but not to suppress them.

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

Leah sucked in a breath and nodded slowly, feeling that familiar and confusing mix of emotions surge. “Yes. I loved him, Zaril, not unlike how I think you loved Juno. I thought, at least fr a time there, that we might have a future together. It’s been hard to not only reconcile the end of the relationship, but disentangle my feelings for him from the reality of the situation. You have to keep in mind that we had only been broken up for three months when I was transferred to the Sentinel. So far, we were together longer than we’ve been broken up. So it still hurts, and all this stuff now makes it more confusing, more painful, and I just…” She shook her head. It felt self explanatory in many ways.

~Leah Hart, NP
“I understand, at least as best as i can without sharing deeper.” He smiled, you are and intriguing woman Leah. Im confident that you will find someone worthy of it, and your free spirit” he noted.

He smiled warmly and sat with her, as she continued to think and process.

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

She gave a soft snort. Did she believe it? Perhaps. But right now she was too hurt to put too much stock in the notion. Leah wasn’t one to look for a relationship, she just let them happen. She supposed the same would be true going forward.

Leah was acutely aware of his hands holding hers still, and the small embarrassed part of her wanted to remove her hand. Instead, she acknowledged the awkwardness of this whole damn thing and set it aside. Talking it out had helped though. She felt calmer. That was what mattered, wasn’t it? She definitely couldn’t be going around snapping at random gossiping crewmates.

“Well, I suppose we can call this session done, huh?” she said after a few moments.

~Leah Hart, NP

He smiled warmly at her, “If that is what you wish” he stated. “I’m enjoying getting to know you, even if it is a harder part of your life.” he paused a moment bringing his hand to his cheek and leaving it there for a moment, then releasing it too her. “For me relationship is always about the bad and the good, it’s how one can truly know and support another. “Thank you for trusting me with your thoughts and frustrations, it means a so much to me” he bowed his head.

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel

She gave him a small smile. “And thank you for holding space for me. I don’t know what the coming days will bring, but I know I can’t just shut down.”

Leah looked around her office. “And maybe I should do better at assessing my state before I start sessions with people.” She shook her head. “I know you understand and were more than willing to help, but I dislike my work space to to flooded with my own personal stuff. I too prefer to have sharing between people about all things, but there are boundaries I have to normally keep in order to help people.” Leah snorted. “Though, to be fair, I often toss out the rules in favour of creating ad hoc ones on the fly, but Kreed knows this about me and for the most part it’s a feature of my skills, not a hindrance.”

~Leah Hart, NP

Zarhil stood, smiled. “You have not hindered me in anyway, it has been quite therapeutic actually. The thing I am missing most and morning is connection know someone beyond a casual hello, how are you, in the walkway that is meaningless. I look forward to spend more time being hindered if that is what has occurred” he said with a small nod. “Sametime tomorrow?” he asked

Lieutenant Junior Grade Zaril Dovek
Communication Officer U.S.S Sentinel