Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in side - sim: Head Case

Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in side - sim: Head Case

Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in side - sim: Head Case
Posted by… suppressed (27) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
Rand was curled up on her bed (well it used to be her bed) in Randy’s quarters. Scott had volunteered to spend the day with her. Rand hated it. She did genuinely like Amelia. She was sweet and lively and everything Rand was not. The girl DID push her anxiety to the limits, but it wasn’t done on purpose. She was sweet and compassionate though. When she had realized all those months ago that Rand suffered from horrible anxiety, she had kept Rand’s secret and had done her best to try not to make her anxious. What Rand hated was that people felt like they had to babysit her.

Scott was pestering her for details about the wedding. She’d come with gobs of data disks with pictures of all kinds of things, and when Rand’s head began to hurt too much to translate, Scott just asked her to pick either/or. It was actually fun and felt normal to be planning her wedding to Roman. However Rand was making no concrete plans about it. She and Roman hadn’t even talked about it, and (she thought rather depressingly) she wasn’t likely to remember tomorrow.

Rand

Scott went looking for Rand. She checked the rec room, the galley, all the labs, Alden’s office, and pretty much everywhere else she could think of that Rand might find or get lost, even the Jeffries tubes, before braving the command deck. First she Rand the chime for Alden’s door, twice, and when there was no response, she moved to the Farquharson quarters and rang the chime and waited

~ Scott

Hearing the chime, Rand sat up a little. She was sure it was probably Scott, Roman and Randy wouldn’t use the chime. She pressed the control for the door so it would open. She was a bit dizzy that morning and so she’d stayed mostly seated. She was looking through a scrapbook that she hadn’t realized she’d left there. She offered a slight smile to Scott. What should she say? She’d never been in a situation like this so she settle on “Hi.”

Rand

Scott smiled, “Hi!” Then she stepped in, without being invited, and stood by the door. “We were looking at wedding stuff… and then you disappeared a bit. Are you okay?” She asked. It was asked rather quickly, in Scott’s typical bubbly way. “And why aren’t you in YOUR quarters? Don’t you live with the Commander?” She asked, pointing toward the wall that adjoined with Alden’s quarters.

~ Scott

Rand started to nod, of course she was okay. And then she looked at Scott confused as she kept talking. The confusion made her anxious and she began to stutter. “I…I thought we were sup…p…posed to meet here. B..b..b…bigger ssspace.” She was supposed to meet Scott here, wasn’t she? “Wer..r..rrren’t wwwe?”

“My quarters,” Scott said. “I thought you just…” Were anxious or chickened out were the words meant to follow her statement, but instead she let her voice trail off. “But that’s okay! We can do it here!” She continued cheerily, showing Rand she still had the PaDD and data disks.

Scott said they had been looking at…wedding things…that was… that’s right, Rand remembered now that she said it. So why had she come here? Pain pounded at the back of her head and radiated out. She didn’t know why she left. If she was already with Scott why did she come here to meet her? “Chan eil fhios agam carson a rinn mi sin. Tha mi duilich.”

Rand

Scott didn’t understand any Gaelic, but by tone of voice she thought it might have been an apology of some kind. So, at the risk of being wrong, she said, “That’s okay. Here works too. It’s not important where we do this.” Then she offered a friendly smile.

~ Scott

The room was rather large. Smaller than the Captain’s quarters and actually as big as Roman’s. A third of the space was the bedroom, two dressers, two twin sized beds, and two bedside tables. The space was divided by one of those solid half walls topped with lattice work. The other 2/3rds of the space was taken up with a large work area that consisted of two desks, a table and chairs and a large counter/pantry/food prep area. This was why the ‘yeoman’s office’ was so small. Most of the work was meant to be done here, in this space. The office was simply to provide an area to meet with others and not invade the personal space of those living there.

“Woooow! Your room is BIG, Rand!” Scott cried upon entering. She shrugged, “Well, I guess you ARE supposed to be sharing with Randy.” She let out a little girly giggle and smiled, “You know, your brother is pretty cute. I mean, I know he’s dating Morgan.” Then she changed the topic again and said, “I’ve always wanted to share a room.”

Rand had to smile. She didn’t think there was one girl she knew that didn’t tell her how cute her brother was. What made it worse, or maybe made Randy more appealing (Rand wasn’t sure) was the fact he knew he was but never was arrogant or used it. He was always genuine with people. She also thought Randy and Scott would make good friends if not a good couple. Randy loved gossip too. The difference was he was careful who he talked to about it (usually only Rand). Like Amelia he never spread or repeated anything malicious. She shook her head and looked around the room. “Always…s…shared with R..r..rrandy.”

Those four words set Scott of on a new tangent. “You’ve ALWAYS shared a room with him? You’ve never had your own room?” She tilted her head and then smiled, “It must have been weird moving in with Alden then… like your first time away from your brother!” She commented excitedly. “Still, must be nice to live with someone.”

Rand had had a roommate at Academy. The girl drove her crazy. Randy hadn’t joined the Academy right when she did, but they wouldn’t have been allowed to share a room anyway. Then on her trip out to K7 she’d had her own room. It had been strange to be alone. She had never wanted her own room, but Scott was right. It had been strange to move in with Roman. She and Randy were so used to each other. It had taken her awhile to get used to it, to settle in, and that was even without her anxiety. Rand thought about it. Officers, even ensigns, had the privilege of single rooms. Enlisted all bunked together until they were higher ranking. “You…a..ask for one.” There was no rule against it.

Rand nodded and tried to smile but her head really hurt. She considered a moment sitting at the table, but wasn’t sure she could sit in the chair long. So she waved at the bed for Amelia to have a seat. Rand reached over to the side table for her water but there wasn’t any. How much water had she had today? She couldn’t remember. She really wanted to call Randy and ask for something for her head, but she didn’t want to worry him. She wasn’t sure she could get the question out where Scott would understand her, so she stood up, slowly and dizzily and made her way to the cold pantry. She made her way back just as slowly and offered Scott one of the bottles of water she’d grabbed. Once Rand was settled she activated the ice pack she’d gotten as well and placed it against the back of her head, propping it in place with pillows. She reached over and turned the lights down some, they were hurting her head. She looked at Scott and waved at the overhead lights, “Okay?” she didn’t want it too dark for Scott.

Scott took a seat on the bed and nodded. “They’re okay like that.” She turned the PaDD on but dimmed the screen so it was still light enough to see but not so bright as it normally would be. Then she put in one of the data disks.

The headache made it hard to think, but she had to be able to do this if she ever wanted to go back to work. “Wha…what did…you f..f..find?” Rand asked her as she waved at the data disks.

Rand

Scott smiled a biiiig smile. “Oh, TONS.” She exclaimed happily. Then she opened the data disk and began showing Rand emerald green dresses of different kinds: some sleeveless, some short sleeved, some LOW cut, some more conservative. Some with short skirts, some with long, flowing skirts. She lingered on each picture until Rand gave some kind of acknowledgement, giving her time to process. There were probably thirty dress images there.

~ Scott

Rand looked at each one carefully. She knew Roman would like the green, but when she’d told Scott ‘green’ she’d meant accents, decorations, etc. She wanted something more…traditional than the solid emerald green. But they were pretty. Rand shook her head no to each of the short skirts. She wanted something long, but after looking at what Scott had picked she didn’t know if she wanted something full and flowing or some of those mermaid skirts were really pretty. The LOW cut dresses made her turn bright red every time. She thought she might look really pretty in them, and she could imagine the look on Roman’s face and decided she’d never make it through the ceremony if she wore that. She shook her head quickly ‘no’ at each of them. Which almost hurt her head, but it was a good reminder to drink her water.

Scott giggled lightly as Rand’s face turned light red, “Come on, you’d look beautiful. The commander wouldn’t be able to take his eyes off you,” she commented, not realizing that was the problem.

Rand’s eyes were really wide, her brows raised and she nodded in agreement. She wasn’t going to discuss anything like that, even if she could talk normally. Roman would look at her with that ‘Robinhood look’ of his and she’d forget her vows. Even with the officiant telling her what to say.

She stopped on one for a long time. It looked like her dress from Valentine’s day. She loved that dress, but she wanted something he hadn’t seen before. “Drrress s..ss…supposed s..sss…” Rand went quiet in frustration for several minutes. She hated her stutter and that it had returned. “Sssurprise him.” After Scott showed them all to her Rand went back to a couple. Roman had nothing to do with his family, but there were traditions that were important to him. The English had a penchant for white wedding gowns. It had spread across the globe. She didn’t know if that mattered to him. She tipped her head at Scott and asked, “White dr..resses?”

Rand

“You want the dress to surprise him?” Scott looked at the dres on the screen. “Would this not surprise him?” She asked. Then she smiled and excitedly grabbed another data disk. “I found some in white, too, just because… you know, traditional.” Scott wasn’t all that familiar with traditions. But she did of course know brides usually wore white. She put in the data disk and started showing Rand white dresses. Scott hadn’t known what style Rand liked, so like the green, there was a mix of long dresses, short dresses, low cut dresses, more conservative dresses, all white and all different styles. “Next time I’ll find more longer dresses,” Scott commented. She noticed with the green how Rand had turned down nearly every single one of the short skirted dresses immediately.

~ Scott

Rand shook her head with a smile, “V..valen....t..tine’s.” It looked like a dress she already wore, but it was too hard to verbalize. She almost flopped back before she remembered not to bump her head. She sighed trying not to get frustrated. The short ones were very pretty, Rand just preferred them long, but she couldn’t seem to settle on anything she liked best. She had a vague idea in her head, but not enough to help her decide. One dress she stopped on for a long time. It was gorgeous. White Victorian lace over pale blue satin, with an empire waste and cap sleeves and a wide white satin ribbon around the waist. If the blue had been a pastel mint color, it would be perfect. Or at least a first choice alternative if she couldn’t find what she really wanted. After she’d gone through all of them she went back to that one and tapped it. “W..wish it wasss gr..reen.”

Rand

Scott took the PaDD, tapping away on it for a while, until she found what she was looking for. “Let’s see.... here!” She had found the dress in green for Rand and she turned the PaDD and showed her, smiling widely. “Is that going to be the dress?” She asked excitedly. “It’s reaaally pretty!” She said and then put a hand to her mouth and whispered for effect, “I promise I won’t say anything! So the Commander doesn’t end up finding out.” And then she raised her voice back to normal, “But you’d look great in that one, I think.”

~ Scott

Rand really liked it. It was beautiful. It reminded her of a modern take of the dress Elizabeth Bennet would have worn. She thought Roman would like it. “Mmmaybe.” Rand’s fingers tapped a rhythmic staccato on the top of her scrapbook. She looked down at it and suddenly opened it. She flipped through several pages before stopping on one. There were several pictures, all weddings, but a close look would show each pictures was a different wedding, but the dress was the same. It was a beautiful white satin a-line gown, sleeveless sweetheart neckline. It had a full gentle ruched skirt. A blue, green, with red and yellow accents, tartan wrapped it. Starting at the right waist it rapped around the back and then crossed to the back again and came up and over the left shoulder to pin back at the right hip.

Rand’s gaze was a little wistful as she pointed to each picture. She spoke very slowly and careful, trying to hide the stutter. “Mom......aunt…cousin…grandma…great grandma…” this list went on, but they were all women in her family.

Rand

Scott looked at each of the images. The dress was the same, but the background and people always changed. As Rand pointed out who the women were, Scott quickly got the point. “An heirloom dress? Do you want to wear that instead?”

~ Scott

Rand had never put any thought to what her wedding would be like. She always figured she’d end up the old spinster aunt to Randy’s kids. Instead of cats it would be any stray, stranded, injured animal she could coax into her house. Now that Scott had asked the question, Rand nodded, “Tha.” She cleared her throat and took a sip of water, “Yes.” She actually played with her ring while she thought, twisting it round and back and forth on her finger. Her mother and grandmother would never send it to her, not without coming themselves, and well Sentinel couldn’t handle all the people who would try to come on board. And it would be at least another year or more before they returned to Earth. Unless something recalled them. She sighed then, “C..can’t.” Very slowly and carefully she explained to Scott that her mother and grandmother would never let the dress off of Earth. And then Rand realized she really should talk to Roman about all this. She tapped the PaDD, “This then.”

Rand

Scott listened carefully while she explained. “Can’t you wait to have the wedding? I mean, is there that much of a difference between being engaged to him and being married to him? You’re the same people either way.” She commented, and then shrugged. “But that’s up to you two.” She saved the dress on the PaDD screen to a data disk for Rand. “Do you want to look at decorations? Or… Ooh, wedding cakes?”

~ Scott

Well that was the thing wasn’t it. There was no difference, was there? It didn’t change how Rand felt so why wait? Or why not wait? She and Roman hadn’t had time to discuss it. Or had they? No she was pretty sure they had not. Rand was pretty sure on ship or on Earth, Gorshin would be completely offended if he didn’t get to make their wedding cake. Scott was excited about it though so Rand nodded. Despite having a hard time keeping up with the conversation, Rand was having fun. “Th…think gr.r.reen will ss…ss…tain teeth?”

Rand

Scott smiled, thinking about it. By now she was thinking green was a shared favorite color or something between the two of them and that was why Rand had said go green with it. Finally, she came up with an answer. “Green cake, probably not. Green frosting, almost for sure.”

~ Scott

Rand had been trying to joke a little, but with how serious Scott considered the question, Rand didn’t do a good job at it. She looked through the cakes. Some were very simple and she kind of liked that. Others were more frilly than some of the wedding dresses Scott showed her. And SO many flowers. One of the cakes looked like it had more roses on it than a full grown rose bush. You would get more icing than cake that way. Nothing really stood out to her though. Rand smiled a little and shrugged, “Makes me hungry.”

Rand

When Rand didn’t seem too happy with any of the cakes, Scott said, “I’ll find more cakes later.” She laughed at Rand’s comment and replied, “Me too. Do you want to go down to the galley and get something to eat?”

~ Scott

Rand smiled her thanks. She waved at the different pictures, “Pretty.” It wasn’t that they weren’t pretty but she had no idea what to pick. She had some idea about flavor but design? It really wasn’t something she’d thought about. She nodded though, “Yes.” She closed the scrap book and put it away and threw away her empty water bottle and set the lights back to where Randy preferred them. Then she followed Scott into the corridor and down to the Galley. It was slow but at least some of the dizziness had subsided.

Rand

Scott smiled when Rand said ‘pretty’. She put the data disks in her PaDD’s storage compartment and then stood up. She was patient as she led Rand down the corridor and into the galley. Once they had their food she let Rand pick their seat.

~ Scott

The Galley was a bit crowded, and it took Rand a moment to figure out the best way to get to a table. She was still unsteady on her feet at times and she didn’t want to trip and drop food on anyone. Gorshin solved that problem though. He came around the counter, people moving out of the way of his bulk and he picked up both trays, Rand and Scott’s, and led them over to a table.

“Oh, I can…” Scott said quietly, but trailed off as the tray was lifted out of her hands. “Thank you.” She followed them over to the table and took a seat, thanking Gorshin again.

Over the last few weeks Rand’s apatite was returning to normal. Before her head has hurt so bad it upset her stomach. Her head still hurt but for the most part her stomach had settled. So when she was hungry she was able to eat rather than pick at her food - mostly. Rand was quiet, enjoying the quesadillas that Gorshin too much for conversation.

Rand

Scott ate her food just as quietly. Gorshin’s cooking was always good. When she was done, she stacked her dishes and finished her drink, and then smiled again at Rand. “So have you guys talked about it at all? I mean with your accident and then the commander’s… been so busy working.” She was NOT supposed to tell Rand Alden was shot. That had been made VERY clear to her. NOT supposed to tell.

~ Scott

Rand finished her own food, stacking her own dishes and then opened the extra bottle of water Gorshin had plopped on her tray.

Rand didn’t catch the slip. She assumed it was Scott trying to be nice and not make some rude remark about how much Roman worked or his high standards. But between Roman’s family, the assassin and her own injury, there hadn’t been time. Rand didn’t think talking to Roman while he was unconscious counted.

Scott was very relieved it didn’t seem like she noticed. Franks had taken her aside when she found out and told her not to tell. That telling Rand would make her worse. So Scott was trying really hard not to.

She started to shake her head no, but she guessed they had talked about it a little bit the night he proposed. Rand smiled, her cheeks flushing happily, “Our r…r…rings.”

Rand

“You talked about your rings?” Scott looked like she was trying REALLY hard not to get too excited and overwhelm her. “Ooooooh! What kind of ring are you getting?” She gestured to Rand’s engagement ring, “That one is so pretty!” She said excitedly.

~ Scott

Rand was not quite sure how it came about that Roman chose them, but he had gotten them from Randy. “Family r…r…rrings.” Oh she had a picture in her scrap book! She looked around searching the table, her forehead wrinkled, before she remembered the scrapbook was upstairs. “I ha…ha..have a photo.” She waived above her head indicating back in her room. Rand glanced down at the ring and fought the urge to wiggle her finger to make the ring catch the light. She tapped it with the index of her other hand instead. “My grandmother’s. R..Randy helped.”

Rand

Scott smiled again and nodded. “We can look when we go back up.” Then something occured to her. “Ooooh! If it’s an heirloom ring then your heirloom dress would be perfect! Don’t you think?”

~ Scott

Rand nodded. She did. If she didn’t wear the dress, she would be the first in her family for generations who did not. She didn’t even know if Roman wanted a traditional wedding. He might want a military wedding, and in that case they would wear their dress uniforms. Simple, easy, no fuss. He wasn’t overly fond of anything to do with his family, but Jay’s family might have traditions that Roman might want to honor. She didn’t know.

She was close to her family and would want them there, but as long as Randy was there that was all that mattered. “Would be.” Rand was struggling to keep her voice steady. In this case it was pure anxiety. It was the first time she’d been around a large group of the crew since she got hurt. When she helped Gorshin, she always stayed in the back away from everyone. She didn’t want people to ask questions, or hear her stutter, or speak Gaelic instead of English. “…Ready…to go?” They had both finished eating. If Scott wasn’t Rand would tell her she was tired and ask Gorshin to get Randy or Roman. She didn’t want Scott to feel like she had to leave.

Rand

Scott nodded and left with Rand. She spent most of the rest of the day with her, unless Rand wanted rest. Later that evening, Roman was off duty and headed to their quarters. When he went in, he entered quietly, checking to see if she was asleep.

~ Roman

Rand was laying down on the bed, twitching and moaning slightly. She seemed to be having another night terror. She had one hand folded back over her neck holding an ice pack to her head. She hadn’t meant to doze off, but once the ice started working she’d drifted off. She hated falling asleep when she was alone. The night terrors never seemed to stop and left her confused, disoriented, and woke her with a racing heart and a cold sweat. She could never remember the dreams though.

Roman knew she had been having the nightmares since her second night out of sickbay. There wasn’t much he could do. He did the same things for her she usually did for him, hugging her or rubbing her arms, or sometimes talking softly to her. It was nearing the worst time of year for Roman, and his own nightmares were getting worse, but he was trying to get enough sleep anyway, so he could help her.

Pipkin was on the bed, settled down next to her. When the door opened the little bunny looked up and then hoped to the end of the bed towards him.

Rand

When Roman entered their quarters and saw her, he gave Pipkin a little bit of quick pet and then lay down next to Rand, gently hugging her. She never remembered the dreams, so he didn’t know what they were about, but he did know how it made her feel so he’d stay there with her until she woke up and felt better.

~ Roman