Posted by Captain Molly Holloway (Chief Intelligence Officer) in Counselor’s Office – Molly Holloway

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“Yes.” There was no mistake in her tone. “I’ve tried… everything… physical and mentally exerting myself during the day… I promise you, Commander… I know what you’re probably thinking but… I don’t have a death wish… killing myself was never a thought that even occurred to me. With the exception of a few hiccups, my life is better now than it was many years ago… I… I even did something I never thought I’d do…” She smiled softly. “I changed my last name back to what it was when I was born… Not to mention… I have a terrific relationship with a man I truly love. But…” Holloway shook her head. “All it took was almost seeing him die at my hands…” Molly took the tissue back to her eyes before taking a deep breath. “… and every night when I close my eyes I see him dying all over again.”

“I’ve been angry with the world for a long time… starting by how my dad treated me and my sister as a child, culminating with what I told you about my command being taken away from me. The mission to Beta Prime seems to have been the last drop… and I feel that the nightmares might be just the tip of the iceberg.” Pausing for a moment, took another deep breath, as if she was about to say something embarrassing or humiliating. “Let’s say I do take something for the nightmares. I’ve been seeing counselors since I was ten. Most of them I saw because I was told to. I never thought I needed the help. But… for the first time I’ve been feeling like I do need it and I have no one to reach out to…” Looking straight into Nunn’s eyes, Molly took a last deep breath. “Commander… I don’t know what is wrong with me… Do you think you’d be able to help me? And if so… what can I do?” With a soft smile, Holloway added. “I’ll even show you my Holodeck program if you really want to see it.”

Capt. Holloway, CIO

Katie listened patiently as Holloway worked through her emotions surrounding the turmoil in her life and the nightmares. She carefully kept her face neutral and calm and her eyes resting gently on Holloway. Once she finished, she adopted her firm smile once again and, having had some success touching the woman’s knee before, reached out to hold her hand softly.

Molly didn’t hold the CNS’s hand back, but she also didn’t move hers. Instead she let it lay limply in the Counselor’s grip.

“Captain, you’re already ahead of the game: you know you’re angry with the world and that it’s not completely justified. We can get you through this, I promise,” she summarized, her gaze holding Holloway’s. “I’m not going to promise that you will never have another nightmare again or that a traumatic event may not stir up past memories, but we’ll work through it, starting with getting you some sleep. After that, well, I’m trained in many tools like therapeutic hypnosis. You aren’t even my angriest patient yet.” She said the last part with a small laugh designed to put the CIO at ease.

Lt Cmdr Nunn, CNS

“Of course.” A soft smile crossed Molly’s features. “You must have really angry patients then.” She said shyly, wondering how could someone potentially be angrier than her. At least she wouldn’t trash the place… However, Nunn’s words gave her some hope, and the emotion was visible in the Intel officer’s features. “What is exactly therapeutic hypnosis? And where do you recommend we go from here? Medication-wise and… therapy-wise.” The words left her lips as if she was still ashamed of saying them out loud.

Capt. Holloway, CIO

Katie’s lips pressed together in a firm line as she responded, “yes, I do.” She could feel her heart starting to race again and she closed her eyes for a moment, coaching herself through a slow, deep breath to steady herself and return her focus to her patient.

“I’m not a medical doctor, so we would need to loop a member of the medical staff in to handle medication,” she responded, her tone the most business-like it had been in their entire conversation. “I have an idea of one who would keep everything confidential and provide an excellent resource,” she added, thinking of Ensign Bailey. “Hypnosis allows you to enter a relaxed state of being where we can work through your experiences and endeavor to reframe them in a more positive light.” She kicked herself as she heard a nearly textbook definition come out of her mouth. Here Holloway was finally starting to relax in her presence and she was turning into a robot. She took another deep breath and forced her friendly, soothing smile to return to her face.

Lt Cmdr Nunn, CNS