Posted by Civilian Jessa Novar (Child) in Anger and Accountability…Stockholm syndrome or Machiavellian theory…When the past doesn’t match the future or the present

Posted by Gamemaster Deus Ex Machina (GM) in Anger and Accountability…Stockholm syndrome or Machiavellian theory…When the past doesn’t match the future or the present

Posted by Civilian Jessa Novar (Child) in Anger and Accountability…Stockholm syndrome or Machiavellian theory…When the past doesn’t match the future or the present
SNIP

“I am twelve,” she rolled her eyes letting her annoyance with Rinker’s comment show on her face in in her tone. “It takes a lot of education to be a Guardian and they don’t let children be one just like you have to be a hundred and fifty years old like you are to be a mind seer.” Jessa had zero belief in Rinker being that old but if he was going to call her eight she would age him up a bit. The dig worked far better on women than men but Jessa was too exhausted to come up with something more pointed.

“Well touche - everything I said was wrong and everything you said was right.”

In the few days since she had met Rinker, Jessa had noticed he was becoming less passive and more active in his comments. She had complained she wanted this but sometimes getting what you wanted wasn’t what you thought it would be.

“Further joining mean not only making you our friend but making your enemies ours. We do fine making enemies on our own and seeing your ambassadors, I am certain you have far more enemies than us.”

“Again,” her voice was strained as she tried to hide her frustration, “everyone loves us. They welcome us. One day you will see.” Whether it was the exhaustion or the small nagging voice quelling her rampant nationalism, Jessa lashed out less and attempted to mimic the more verbal banter Rinker consistently displayed with her. Telling him that he was wrong was getting Jessa nowhere. Maybe if she copied what Rinker did and used open-ended questions, it would gain her more traction in bringing him to the Union’s side. It also made her think more and maybe she had jumped the gun about the age comment. She hadn’t ever thought she mentioned her age so maybe Rinker did not know. “As a Guardian, there are some things I want not privy too.” A small concession that she did not know everything might help her win Rinker’s trust and loyalty. With all her companions dead or missing, Jessa needed to establish a new network and support system.

“I will relay how much we will love and welcome your Union in the future to the bodies in our morgue. I’m certain they will be very appreciative.”

Jessa’s face clouded over in an angry expression. “I have never been in a situation like this and I don’t care about you telling me I should have known it would happen this way. Every time the Union has incorporated a planet there were parades, pageants, and celebrations. I am just a kid.”

“Well that is a new position for you. Up until this very moment you have repeatedly stated that you were a Guardian and should be treated with deference and as an adult. And no one knows what is going to happen, but given what we said we were going to do, given all the worlds your government has oppressed with force. And frankly knowing you quartet. A rational adult would have been pretty certain it was going turn out something like the way it turned out.”

“I was not allowed to attend all functions the Elders do as a Guardian. As a Patron, I would be given more responsibilities. Rogan told me that Halston was my last test to becoming a Patron. It was the first time in my life I didn’t want to be anything more than a Guardian.” Using the back of her hand she wiped away a tear from her cheek.

“Halston?”

“I know it is important for you to ask me questions but can we come back to this? It’s been a lot today and I can’t talk about my crime here and the crimes on Halston.” She had mentioned this several times before but in reviewing his notes Rinker could assume the event drastically had altered Jessa’s life in some way. She had alluded to the fact it had some part in her coming to the Federation. She vaguely hinted that Halston drastically changed something about her life in the Union.

“I guess, it has been a long day. But we shouldn’t use things to avoid introspection. Getting better is hard.”

Rinker just shrugged his shoulders. He was growing frustrated with her evasions. He was more permissive in the past as one could only confront what they were emotionally ready for. But as she demonstrated more stability in session that meant she could be challenged more. Hence the change in the tone of the session from more subtile and compliant to more confrontational and argumentive. “You have put in more pins then you have given answers.”

“But why do I have to be the one that is broken,” Jessa asked almost in a rhetorical manner. “Why can’t you all be broken and need to be fixed.” Jessa was not a genius but she was intelligent and clever which at times allowed her to read the room so to speak when people that had higher IQ’s missed things barely past the end of her nose. Her question was philosophical and open-ended giving her the precious time to think before she had to speak next. So many of Rinker’s questions made her think. Maybe it was time she made him think. Her issue was the past month had shown her a side of life she never knew existed about the Union. Admitting this fact and that Halston was the first time she ever questioned anything felt subversive and traitorous to her. Until she could rectify the events on Halston with what she had been raised learning, there was no way Jessa could think about how to share it with Rinker and betray the Union.

“When you have my job you can fix me.”

Taking a few minutes to gather her emotions back under control She continued her explanation about the Prism. “I know you think it is silly to look all over the galaxy for something but it has only been gone for about one hundred years I guess so it is not like it was lost to antiquity. We had pictures of it. We enlightened five galaxies with it. We have crossed vast swatches of space with it and the Undevout stole it. We have been looking for it ever since it disappeared. Rogan said he who had it could ask for anything. All I wanted to ask for was my mom,” Jessa put her face down on her knees and sobbed. Finally, the pieces were snapping into a picture instead of a puzzle. The object Jessa called the Prism was some sort of device that gave the Union great power. As a child, Jessa saw it more as a genie’s lamp where when rubbed it would grant a wish. Rinker could probably surmise that someone older and less scrupulous could use the Prism as a way to gain power. It was also the first time Jessa hinted at a dissenting opinion or group within the Union.

“That isn’t that long ago, our mysterious super space travelers, the Iconian’s, were from 200,000 years ago. So your guys are by comparison, yesterday.”

Jessa Novar

Jessa bit her lip and for the first time put a pin in Rinker’s column on her mental note taking board about things she wanted to learn about. For the past week, Jessa had spent hours listening to Rinker’s questions and comments. She had put a mental pin in topics she did not want to discuss and used the term, lets put a pin in that, to explain that she did not want to talk about it. This was not the first time Rinker mentioned the Iconians and she did want to learn about them. Her problem was how to ask? Stating her interest in a topic made it seem like the Union was not all-knowing or all-powerful. Her only leverage was the fear the crew had about how strong the Union was and right now leverage was all she had.

“Can you give me a little more in the way of details or clues?” He paused. What was his purpose here? The Starfleet officer in him wanted to figure out the mystery perhaps keep a horrific empire from stealing a superweapon. A superweapon they didn’t seem to need to conquer the galaxy. But the other part of him was here to help the defenseless girl., well kind of defenseless.

“It’s a pale blue almost white crystal only in a cube shape. It fits into a larger device but the cube holds vast amounts of information on it. They say when you are in its presence you will feel its power.” The way Jessa stopped talking indicated she was finished as in stated everything she knew about the item.

“That is much smaller than the item the Iconians used. It was a full sized chamber or at least that was what was reported by the Enterprise. Whatever the item, it is what you are feeling about it? What are you going to do about it?”

rinker

Again Rinker made a parallel to this race of Iconians. While Jessa stated she needed the Prism to travel, she did not explain how. The Prism did have a holy resting place so was this like the Iconians chamber. A knot formed in her stomach and Jessa felt sick. She forced her mind to believe it was in grief about the Elders but subconsciously it might be more related to this mystery race Rinker continuously referred to.

“I don’t know,” she shrugged wiping her eyes with the palms of her hands. Since she was crying and still had some blood on her hands from Da Mu’s death, it made her eyes look far redder than they were as the blood smeared over her eye lids like a grotesque pink eye shadow. Her response would not be enough for Rinker. He would just ask a question in another way. Blowing her nose, Jessa took a second to think about a better response.

Rinker went over to the replicator, “12 ounces of lukewarm saline with 70% isopropyl alcohol. in a bowl. 10 cotton wipes.” He waited for the replicator to produce the items.

“I am not hungry,” Jessa stated watching him move over to the machine that seemed to create things out of thin air. Seeing what he actually replicated answered her own question.

“That’s a good thing, because while you could, it isn’t something you are supposed to eat.” He sat down next to her and started wiping the blood off of her without further comment.

“It’s not my blood,” she stating the obvious as Rinker began to clean up the smeared blood stains on her face and neck. Jessa knew it made her look weak sitting there as Rinker cleaned her up but it also felt good. It had been a week since anyone had touched her other than for a medical reason. It had been a month since anyone had actually taken care of her. On the journey here, Jessa had spent in basic isolation as Rogan and Zala engaged in hedonistic pursuits and Da Mu either prayed or studied ancient texts. His hands on her chin to steady her face were firm but gentle. This was probably from his years of being a doctor.

“Well, that doesn’t make it better. You shouldn’t have anyone’s blood on you. Actually, it’s much safer to have your own blood covering you than someone else because what you are really worried about with blood is that it finds its way inside your body. If it is your own blood, not that big of a deal.”

“People think our blood is holy,” she replied in a neutral tone. “When an Elder di,” she felt the word choke her throat as if she were being physically strangled to not finish it. “It’s because of the nanites. Non-divine do not have them. We can transfer them like I tried,” she blinked rapidly avoiding words such as Da Mu, death, trying to save him, or anything to relive what she had just experienced on the Promenade. “It’s why Rogan wanted me to cut myself. I was just scared to.” Why she admitted this to Rinker would be something Jessa would think about later. Right now she just wanted someone to make her feel better and Rinker helping her clean up was the closest thing she would get to being held. If that meant sharing what made her said, so be it. She was in enough trouble already.

“I probably still could extract them. But some nanites are powered by the body. When the bodies dies, they die fairly quickly. Some die slowly, some go into status.” He pondered that for a moment. He would have to examine all the blood of all the aliens. He was certain it was going to be a Borg situation or that would have happened already, but he didn’t need one of the bodies suddenly coming back to life on them.

Jessa had no idea what would happen to her once the crew settled down from the attack on the promenade.
She had no idea where they would send her or how she was going to survive but right now she felt safe and she did not want that feeling to end. As he finished, Jessa was desperate for the illusion of safety to continue. Raising her hand, she held it out for Rinker to wipe the blood off and began to speak. He always gave her his full attention when she was speaking and Jessa used this fact now.

“I guess it doesn’t matter anymore but I haven’t told you something. I didn’t want to say it because I was scared about the Altar of Cleansing if I said it. You might not hold others accountable but we do.” Raising the arm he was not cleaning, she cleared her throat before stating. In all her other conversations with Rinker, Jessa was not wearing her armor. At least now, she had some other form of information to help them all understand.

“Show me data file of the last Undevout that was Cleansed.”

The first thing Rinker would notice was how less advanced the Union’s holographic technology was as compared to the Federation. The image was clear but encased in a blueish white haze that seemed to almost be a frame of the scene. The hologram lacked the picture-perfect quality the Federation holograms had. In the image the participants were speaking what Rinker could assume was Jessa’s native tongue however the statement of a picture being worth a thousand words applied here. Rinker watched as someone in all black appeared to be pronouncing judgement on someone restrained between two metal poles. At the end of the speech flames erupted from the base of the poles and slowly moved up the poles. They did not directly touch the person held between them but it was clear the person could feel the fire based on their reaction. While the scene was grotesque it lacked any verbal protestations from the person being tortured and any graphic gore. Now that Jessa was sure Rinker understood the gravity about what she was about to do, she turned it off. Jessa had no desire to let the image play to the end.

“Well that was graphic, morbid, and a little extreme.” He had already told her what he had thought, but he was forced to repeat it. “I don’t think death by immolation to be the proper response to failure to learn. If in fact they failed to learn as opposed to failed to believe.”

“I don’t know what that word is but I assume it means burning alive?” She didn’t need a definition but wanted to make sure they were talking about the same thing. She continued to talk suddenly needing Rinker to understand how important the information was she was giving him.

Jessa spoke in a quiet voice playing with the tissue now that she could use her arm again since she stopped playing the hologram. “If you are worthy, God lets you survive the ordeal and your sins are cleansed from your soul. That is what the adjudicators say but I think you only survive if you have enough nanites and the Undevout don’t have nanites.” Wiping her eyes, Jessa no longer felt the stickiness of the blood that Rinker removed a few minutes earlier.

“It’s a set up. Like many these religious tests are. About 2000 years ago we had a similar practice. They would burn “known” witches at the stake, but people the suspected were witches they were thrown in a running river. If you drowned you were innocent, if you floated you were a witch and got to live long enough to be burned.”

“I will be held accountable for the deaths of the Elders and I don’t have any nanites left,” she blinked rapidly trying to put on a brave face. “I am okay with that. After I will be with god but…some people say my mom is,” she swallowed hard needing a second, “part of the Undevout. They say she left and took me when the Rectoress found out but I know they are wrong. She is not a traitor which is why I need the Prism. If she comes back with it she will be fine so I need to find it before the rescue fleet comes for me. I have to have it to protect her because if you love someone you do anything to keep them safe, right?” Pulling her knees up, Jessa put her face on them and struggled not to cry. She was scared of the Cleansing but even more scared of failing her mom.

Jessa Novar

“Well I’m fairly certain we aren’t welcoming the rescue fleet any more than we welcomed your ship so, we are in this together. ” The individual and internal weaponry was pretty impressive but in the ship to ship combat it didn’t seem to have much of an advantage.

“So not to sound like Indiana Jones, but I think we need to find the Prism before the Nazis.”

Rinker

“Yes Dropping her head to the side she left it resting on the side of his arm. “I’m scared,” she admitted in a soft tone. “Can we just sit here for a bit? I am so tired and just need a minute then I will answer any more questions you have.” Jessa had no idea why she was so exhausted right now. She had ridden the roller coaster of so many emotions since the breakout started a few hours ago. This was the first time it was quiet and she knew what to expect from her surroundings. No one came into Rinker’s office unless he opened the door for them. Jessa would hear them coming and be able to choose her reaction. Rinker was one of the few people she trusted on the ship. If he said she was safe with him, Jessa believed it. Right now she just wanted to close her eyes and think about nothing.

Jessa Novar

“I’m surprised you are still awake. There was a lot of adrenaline and other stuff coursing through your body and then suddenly it stopped. That naturally leads to a crash and great fatigue.” Rinker did have a knack for explaining things. It was a trick of his so it sounded like he was participating and sharing and he really was just describing so he didn’t have to add much to a conversation.

Rinker

His assertion was correct. The stress and adrenaline were fading from her body making Jessa exhausted. It also made her shake slightly from feeling cold as her body attempted to re-regulate from the icy hormone that had flooded her body. “Would it be okay if I closed my eyes for a minute or until Jack or Ian come for me,” she asked. Jessa had no idea if they would come for her but it was her hope. Looking at the couch, Jessa wanted to get up and go lay down on it. For office furniture, it was very comfortable. Lifting her head off his body, she stopped before getting up. General Vyce had drilled into their heads that in combat when you felt safe was probably the time you were most vulnerable. What if she slept so soundly, that Jessa did not hear anyone come into the room? What if they gave her a sedative and she woke up in a prison cell or worse off the ship?

Turning her body perpendicular to face him, Jessa took a breath trying to emit a sense of calm and control. “I promise I will not hurt you. I just need to feel safe and I don’t feel safe if I am sleeping.” Touching her neck, the armored suit instantly enveloped her body. The metal cocoon reacted increasing the environmental controls inside the suit to help warm her like a blanket. It was not going to the be most comfortable place to sleep but it was the safest. Jessa left the face shield to be transparent. The suit made the crew uncomfortable but maybe if they could see she was sleeping, they would leave her alone.

“Hurt me?” Rinker chuckled. “Did you see me. My skills are impregnable.”

“If you let me sleep here I promise to tell you all about Halston when I wake up.” Rinker had asked about it earlier and Jessa completely ignored it. Maybe it was time to share some things instead of ignoring them.

Lying down on the floor, Jessa wiggled and squirmed trying to find a reasonably comfortable position. The suit was not designed for naps but inside it, nothing could harm her.

He was in no more danger with her sleeping here than if she was awake and here. In fact he was safer when she was asleep. One hour later

Normally, Ian would have commed or knocked on Rinker’s door respecting the privacy of those inside. Today was not a normal day, however. Palming the controls on the door, Ian waited to see if he could just walk in or would need permission.

Jessa Novar and Ian Bordeaux

The door was not locked, but had to be opened intentionally. So none of that walking up to it and it swishing open. If Ian keyed it to open it would.

Rinker

The door slid open and the first thing Ian noticed was the lump of metal on the floor. There was no need to ask if it was Jessa or not. Only four people had suits like that and three of them were dead. “Did you sedate her?”

“It was my personality.” He looked down. “I have been known to have that effect on women.”

“I need a drink. Where is your booze,” he stated almost as a command instead of question. “We are cleaning up the Promenade now. None of our people died but several were hurt and a lot of people are being treated in sickbay.” Roughing up his hair, Ian paced slightly. It was clear the man was struggling with processing the situation. “Thanks for getting her out of there but now we need to figure out where to stick her. Sick bay is out with everyone being treated there and it’s not like there is not a division of child services anywhere in the area. Not that I am planning on turning her over,” he quickly added, “but with Kelly out we are doing triple duties everywhere.” In less than two minutes, Ian had rambled the current situation almost in a stream of consciousness rather than rational thought.

Ian Bordeaux and Jessa Novar

Rinker opened a drawer and picked out a glass bottle placing it on his desk. “Its the real stuff. You won’t be able to go on duty for a couple hours after drinking this.” It was a question. One that he didn’t expect that Ian would respond in the negative. So much so he didn’t even wait for the answer. If he did surprise, that just meant twice as much for Rinker.

Rinker

Dropping into a seat, Ian took the glass of amber liquid and swallowed a large sip. Rinker poured generously which Ian appreciated. The clear amber-colored liquor had all the strength of the booze but none of the bite indicating it was top shelf. He savored the sip staring at Jessa passed out on the floor for a long few seconds. Downing another large swig, Ian pulled his attention off Jessa before addressing Rinker. “I’m starting struggle with this,” he admitted in a strangely candid moment before taking a long swig and polishing off his drink. “Any advice you have on what we should do with her since her outings with her homicidal homeboy’s? We need to come up with a plan and as the residential psychiatrist I could really use your feedback.” Holding out his glass, Ian was in for a penny and in for a pound right now with this impromptu counseling session.

“Parenting is not a simple thing. We can’t assume there is a straight manualized treatment to becoming a parent less so when you are trying to parent a 12 year old without the first 11 years of relationship. She is redirectable.” Rinker wasn’t having a problem with her, but virtually everyone was, but they were far more judgy.

“What did she talk about with you when you got her in here?” Ian knew Rinker was in a particularly delicate situation. As the chief counselor, Rinker’s recommendations would hold a lot of weight when deciding the course of action with Jessa’s future. Ian also knew Rinker would not break patient confidentiality unless the patient was in danger or in danger of hurting others. “Did she tell you where her pot stash is,” he let out a small chuckle. The booze was going to his head faster than he expected, probably due to stress. The comment alluded to Rinker’s first conversation with Ian about what he would and would not share about Jessa’s sessions. Back then he told Ian things like Jessa’s intimate life or pot stash would not be shared but homicidal inclinications or suicidal tendencies would immediately be brought to Ian’s attention. Right now Ian hoped it was less of the latter.

Ian Bordeaux

“Ian there isn’t any magical information during our sessions. If there were I would tell you what you needed to know. Frankly, most of her issue with you is you pretending you are her father, before doing any stuff that would build a relationship that would be fatherly. She also views herself as an adult and you treat her like a child and a younger than 12 year old child.”

“How you respond if not your father started treating you like a high school student? Her responses to you are the most normal thing she’s doing since I met her.”

“Ian you aren’t wrong, you never had the decade of learning how to be a dad and now you have an instant teen-age girl. I wish you luck.”

Rinker