Posted by Lieutenant Commander Zef Rollo (Counselor) in Counsellor’s Office- Calloway’s Eval

Posted by Lieutenant Faye Calloway (Mission Specialist) in Counsellor’s Office- Calloway’s Eval

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Zef Rollo (Counselor) in Counsellor’s Office- Calloway’s Eval
Posted by… suppressed (1) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)

Faye looked away and shrugged. What could she say? It was always the same. People would tell her that if she only tried things would get better. And then she tried harder, and harder and harder. And for a brief moment it was like there was something of equilibrium in her life, but if was so terribly brief. Of course, she had not powers of precognition. She couldn’t have known that a seeming simple choice about an assignment would derail her life so dramatically. An understatement if there ever was one. “When you’ve had my life, you tend to become a skeptic,” she said finally.

~Faye Calloway, Data Specialist

Calloway had initially struck her as a very competent, experienced officer who had a sense of accomplishment. Rollo was a little disappointed in herself for having gotten it wrong. She set her coffee cup down and folded her hands in her lap. “So, you’ve given up then?”

—Rollo, CNS

A look of surprise swept across her features and she actually laughed, if bitterly. “No, I’ve not given up. I’m just a realist Counsellor. If I had given up, I wouldn’t have come back to Starfleet after the attempt on my life, or taken the thinnest chance of escape I was given and gotten out of Romulan space after nine months of torture. You think I’ve given up? I’m still here and I’m trying. I just don’t expect too much.” She sighed. *It’s too… hard. Mentally. I’ll just get myself all worked up and screw it up, guaranteed. Better to lay low a bit, even if I have settled in here better than I expected.” She thought of the one exception and even then it was so far-fetched and she knew she had already set herself up for disappointment.

~Faye Calloway, Data Specialist

“It doesn’t matter what I think, Lt. If I think you’ve given up, that’s all it is—a thought inside my head. What matters is what YOU think, and it sounds like you still have a little hope that things will work out right. Like you said, you’re trying—and that’s really all anyone can do. However, having said that, always expecting the worst is a pessimistic way to live. I’ve seen a few people rob themselves of happiness that could have been theirs if they just hadn’t been so negative.” Once again, she picked up her coffee and sipped at it. “Just something to think about. You might be warding off happiness with your fear of being disappointed. I don’t know that, I’m just putting it out there for you to consider.”

—Rollo, CNS

Faye shrugged. “What you might call a fear, others might see as a reflex based on experience. It’s not like I made up what’s happened to me. It is what it is. Besides, on this ship I’ve learned that some people are going to sneak into your life whether you like it or not,” she said with something of an amused smile. Even in her more surly moments there were a few people who hadn’t been put off by that. If anything that had been the greater surprise. “If I have any hope right now, it’s because those people don’t react to me… badly? I guess. I don’t know how to describe it.”

~Faye Calloway, Data Specialist