Posted by Commander Shara Calloway (Executive Officer) in Lounge- Contemplations

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Aasrel Izei (Chief Medical Officer) in Lounge- Contemplations

Posted by Commander Shara Calloway (Executive Officer) in Lounge- Contemplations
Posted by… suppressed (4) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)

“No, actually, but that is interesting.” Aasrel replied. He’d been too wrapped up in his own problems to take the interest in the crew he should be. He didn’t really know anyone at all that well, save for Bethany. “I would love that. Set the day and time and I’ll be there.”

~ Izei, CMO

“Done deal,” Shara said, her smile not just genuine but more at ease in public than she had in a while.

Plucking at the strings, she played a simple children’s tune. “What sort of music do you enjoy?”

~Shara Calloway, XO

“Classical, pop, rock, things like that,” Aasrel responded with a shrug. “I’m not very picky.”

~ Izei, CMO

Shara nodded. “All things I can work with. My mother played Earth classical music with the lcoal orchestra and so that was what my foundation was in. We could start there and then see where it take us,” she said, breaking into a smile. For a moment Shara was taken back to Arkelis and playing in the pub after it had closed since it was the only piano she had access to. She used to play all the time on Tracken, but it was like she had told Aasrel: she wasn’t exactly sue what stopped her. But one-on-one was a start.

Continuing the song, Shara leaned back a little more in her seat. “I used to play the piano on our colony. We had one in the community hall and we frequently had dances and music nights. My favourite were where we brought everything outside and I would play under string lights and there would be a fire going. I always loved that feeling of community coming together.”

~Shara Calloway, XO

Aasrel nodded. “When I.. lost my telepathy, I wasn’t able to feel that community anymore. I felt isolated and alone constantly. It’s hard to explain. I’m still, even now, getting used to having it back.”

~ Izei, CMO

She studied him for a moment. “I can understand that. I don’t feel everyone around me the way you do, but I effectively cut myself off for a very long time. It’s only been in the last few years that that has changed and I’ve allowed myself to be a part of the community around me again. BUt it’s still hard. I second-guess myself all time. I’m not the same person I was back then, so I’m navigating all of this as a very different person. What might have worked back then doesn’t necessarily work now.”

~Shara Calloway, XO

Aasrel nodded. “That’s what I’ve run into. I thought when I had it back… Everything would be back to normal. That didn’t happen.”

~ Izei, CMO

Shara gave an understanding smile. “It sucks, doesn’t it?” She chuckled, letting her playing drift off. “Like so many other things, it’s a process, which is even worse. Som days it would be nice if something was just… simple.”

~Shara Calloway, XO

“If I hear one more psych say it’s a process I’ll hit something, and I’m not prone to anger.” Aasrel complained. “I just want to look in mirrors and enjoy being around people without obsessive thoughts about my body.” It was good he was talking about it, usually he didn’t. Not at all, with anyone.

~ Izei, CMO

She nodded slowly. “I have spent more time in therapy than I care to admit, but I’m not ashamed of it. I just wish I didn’t feel like I’ve taken so many steps backwards. It’s not true in reality, but it feels that way.”

“Would you believe I have a massive case of imposter syndrome? Being a first officer is far from anything I ever planed or had even wanted for myself.”

~Shara Calloway, XO

Aasrel nodded. “Even doctors are trained to screen command staff for a number of mental health conditions, even if we don’t really have the means to treat them. The amount of command staff with some kind of issue is… Not a minimal number.”

~ Izei, CMO