Posted by Lieutenant Commander Janusz Korczak (Counselor) in Counselor’s office - Cadet Trenton Check In

Posted by Cadet Ashlyn Trenton (Security Officer) in Counselor’s office - Cadet Trenton Check In

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Janusz Korczak (Counselor) in Counselor’s office - Cadet Trenton Check In
Posted by… suppressed (13) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Finding her way there was no problem, walking in was a whole other story. Ashlyn has had a history of visits with Counselors from before she joined Star Fleet, traumatic events made them a nesecity. She had since moved on from those events, though there was still some residual issues that plagued her from time to time. For the most part, they had no noticeable impact on her work. She was more alert than average, and her natural suspicion and caution helped her to take notice of small details, all of which help in making her a better candidate for Security. The drawback being night terrors, paranoia, and trust issues.

Ashlyn paced back and forth in front of the door a few times trying to get her nerves under control with breathing exercises. When finally calm, she activated the chime, Here we go again.

OOC: Welcome aboard! Glad to have you with us. Just a quick note, make sure you sign off at the end of your posts with your name and position. It just helps everyone know when the thread moves from one person to the next (and don’t worry if you forget, we all do from time to time. )

James

The door slid open and the office on the other side of the door was unlike any area in the rest of the ship. It was lit in a more subdued manner than the rest of the ship, with the light coming from wall lamps rather than the typical overhead lighting. Multiple bookcases with glass enclosed shelves lined one wall, filled with copies and originals of many texts on many different subjects, and a quick glance would show multiple languages as well. The desk was set at an angle against the opposite wall to the door in the corner, allowing for a large open space in the middle. Here there was a couch and a few chairs, one of which sat in front of and facing away from the desk. Pictures hung on the walls, some were even old photographs. Each depicted either places, individuals, or groups of people, and many were in black and white.

The Counselor was wholly plain looking; in fact so nondescript that he almost blended in with the office. His voice, on the other hand, was distinctive. “Please come in. I am Lieutenant Commander Korczak, the ship’s Counselor. Have a seat.” and he indicated the siting area before the desk. The man had a most unusual accent, as if two wholly unrelated accents were vying for control. Even with that, his speech was clear and articulate; with crisp pronunciation and diction. The only other noticeable fact of the man were the glasses perched on his nose… actual glasses.

Korczak took a seat in the seating area and pushed said glasses up his nose a bit higher. “If you would like a drink before we start, you are welcome to the replicator as well.”

Korczak, CNS

Cadet Trenton quietly took a seat, deliberately avoiding the couch and taking a moment to let her surroundings sink in. Signs of her usual paranoia being evident as she appears equal parts cautious and suspicious of this room. Not surprising given that her psychological profile deals with a lot of post-traumatic stress that she is still actively dealing with. According to Trenton’s record, she has a keen eye for attention to detail and works well with structure and training. Even in the worst of situations, she has been able to fall back on her training quite effectively. It is when the structure fails or the training leaves out a key situation that Cadet Trenton falls back further than what is useful.

Before her Starfleet training, Cadet Trenton was a survivalist as was necessary for the unstable region she was in. Trust was very hard-won and there was no room for meaningful social interactions. Because of the ongoing political strife that was destabilizing the region, Trenton had to resort to sneaking aboard a shuttlecraft that had landed for an away mission. Using a stolen sensor mask to hide her bio-signature, she made it to the ship where the captain took a successful gamble of allowing her to claim asylum to not be returned to the surface.

There are many such reports that come from distant fringe Federation worlds, some of them have the benefit of leading to full-scale investigations to try to re-stabilize the region. Makoa III is still pending investigation as the Federation still receives regular reports though those reports are starting to come under scrutiny as many refugees like Cadet Trenton come forward with their own list of how certain events take place. While the events differ wildly from the official reports and Trenton’s recollections on the events, the for certain thing is that she has no surviving family. While this does lead to some of her social issues, it does mean she makes stronger bonds with the people she does count as ‘allies’. All this information in her records explains that she is no stranger to the Counselor’s office and will likely be a repeat visitor.

((OOC: I plan on making a later post that will house detailed records and logs of the events that took place at a later date.))

-Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

OOC: That’s a lot of great information. I dont know if you know or not, but you have a place to write up your character’s bio. Click on Profile at the top of the page, then find your characters name and click that. Then Edit This Character. You can make a full bio for them and track any in play developments they may go through. You can read other characters bios as well just by clicking on their names on the ship’s roster.
And make sure you keep the club format for tenses in writing in mind. We always post in third person, past tense.

IC: Korczak noted her hesitation, but didnt make that noticable. He simply took a seat across from her and said “I trust your trip to the ship was uneventful?”

Korczak, CNS.

The Cadet carefully observed the Counselor’s movement, the deliberate pace of taking his seat, the way his glasses moved on his face, the creases in his uniform, she was trying to read everything about the man seated before her. His plain, subdued look seemed to only make the Cadet more suspicious of him, especially the glasses. They were not Starfleet standard issue and thus left the cadet’s mind reeling with potential reasons for such a thing from the mundane of style to the extreme of internal recording device with short wave transmissions. The racing thoughts brought Ashlyn’s attention to the bookcases and pictures that all seemed non-standard, could they also be hiding listening devices? Could those books hold coded messages for- Cadet Trenton took a deep calming breath to get her mind back on track. “There was an incident between two cadets over seating arrangements and another Cadet that was refusing to store a religious artifact. The two cadets were handled by the co-pilot, I then helped the co-pilot understand the significance of the artifact and convinced him to let them keep it on hand. Minor incidents, nothing that needs reporting.”

-Cadet Ashlyn Trenton
((OOC: I will admit, I’m still working on the writing style. It’s not one I’m really used to and tend not to think of it until after I like the sound and flow of the post. A habit that will be hard to break I’m sure.))

OOC: You are doing fine. And I want to apologize for missing this thread for so long. It wont happen again.

James

IC: Korczak said “My, my. That is quite the start to your travels. But it was a good thing you were there. Well done on diffusing what could have been a most… difficult… situation.” He looked at her mannerisms, her tenderness, her deep breath to calm herself. “If I may make an observation, you seem… uncomfortable. May I ask why?”

Korczak, CNS

Cadet Trenton raised a curious eyebrow to the Councilor’s question as if suggesting such a thing should be obvious, “This is a new ship, with new people, in a new situation. I have a difficult time trusting people even on the best of days and tend to be very suspicious of things not in the norm, usually for good reason. On days that are not as good, that suspicion can edge more into paranoia where those slight deviations become something far more extreme. For example, your glasses, while an interesting aesthetic choice for your appearance is still not standard. A part of me is sure that it is just an appearance thing, another part is also sure it’s a recording device or ocular interface. The fact that you don’t have an easily visible recording device also adds to the suspicion of a sense of misdirection or deceit. All leading to a sense that I can’t trust you to be honest with me.” The cadet shifts slightly in the chair, still ready to spring into action should something happen, still remaining as tense as the moment she walked in. “On a good day, I can take a breath and reason that I’m overthinking things and need to give you a chance to validate yourself as a trustworthy person. On a bad day, I probably would have looked at you and the room and said no, then walked out. I’m glad it is not a bad day, it probably would have cost me my career in Starfleet if it was.”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

Korczak looked at her intently for a few moments. “Well, I can assure you that they are not a recording device.” and he took them off and set them on them on the table. “You are welcome to inspect them. As far as my lack of recording devices, well, their absence is two-fold. First, I simply have no need of them. I remember everything I see, hear, read… etcetera… that I experience perfectly. It is a neurological condition called ‘hyperthymesia’. Second… what is discussed here stays here. I am not obligated to discuss you or our conversation with anyone. And as far as your evaluation goes, all I send to the Captain is ‘yes or no’.” and he paused for a moment before continuing.

“Tell me Cadet… would you think your inability to trust to be a hindrance to you here… both on a star ship and in Security?”

Korczak, CNS

During the pause, the cadet did pick up and inspect the glasses with great interest paying close attention to artistic details, the function of individual components, markings, and signs of wear also taking care not to touch the lenses. Ashlyn quietly mumbles something about good craftsmanship and care before putting them back down to hear the Counselor’s question.

The cadet tilted her head in deep thought for a long moment before answering the question, “Not in the slightest. In fact, I believe my controlled expression of trust in others makes me a better asset to both. Constant and regular checking of systems, components, personnel, and services means there is less likely an opportunity for something to fail unexpectedly. Because of this awareness, we can make sure to have contingencies in place in the event that something doesn’t work, falls behind, or breaks. In fact, controlled expectations and trust should be a standard for all starships in my opinion. A starship engineer that goes out with full trust that his forty-year-old warp core won’t fail is a fool. A Doctor that trusts that their xenobiology records are complete and are missing nothing is being arrogant. A security officer that trusts that no one will attack in the middle of Federation Space are being complacent.”

Cadet Trenton took a moment to collect herself after her mild outburst about trusting too much. “I am not incapable of trust, I just have a hard time with it. I can trust that the doctors know more about healing than I do, that engineers can take care of ship systems better than I can, that other security personnel will perform their duties as they should. This doesn’t mean I trust them as individuals but as a part of the team, I can extend a basic trust. If I read someone’s personnel record and it says they have been reported regularly for laziness and ineptitude, I’ll likely trust them less. Once I get used to people and gain more familiarity with who they are, I can trust them more.”

The cadet relaxed back into the chair and no longer looked like she wanted to run away, still not comfortable, but at least not wound up. “Please understand, before I joined Starfleet I lived in a place where I was beaten regularly by the protectors, betrayed by neighbors, and taken advantage of if I wasn’t careful or clever enough to notice it happening. It’s not that I don’t want to trust people, just that trusting others is hard, and in time, the trust will come. I can only ask for patience and understanding.”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

He looked at her for a long moment and then said “You ask for patience and understanding… do you believe your stance on trust provides that to others at the same time? Or do you think that you may possibly be asking for something that you aren’t willing to give of yourself?”

Korczak, CNS

The Cadet’s eyes narrowed at the Counselor, looking for some detail of their expressions or demeanor that may reveal what they are asking, suspicious of the hidden meanings or subtext that she may be overlooking. The cadet then looked away to contemplate a response, adjusting herself again in the chair back to the tense demeanor she had earlier. Something about the question made her uncomfortable while she searched for an answer. “I hold others to the same expectations I hold of myself. I expect that everyone will be suspicious of me until I prove myself to be trustworthy, just as I am suspicious of them. Is that satisfactory or are you looking for something else?”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

Korczak looked intently at Trenton and said “I do not often give direction in these meetings… I try to guide. But I am going to make an exception for you, Cadet.” and he leaned forward slightly. His tone was even and calm, but there was a firmness in that begged the Cadet to listen. “You are doing yourself and your crew mates a terrible disservice. Your expectation of their distrust will encourage such. Your distrust of them from the beginning is not only detrimental to your relationship with those around you… it will adversely effect your performance as well. We as individuals are only as good as the crew is as a whole. You are consciously starting off behind the curve, and setting yourself up for negative repercussions… if not outright failure.” and he leaned back. “It is up to you to change it. And you need to. Because if you continue in this vein… you will not reach the potential that I think you possess or that you wish.”

Korczak, CNS

The Cadet was silent for a long moment before standing up and pace behind the chair she had been sitting in. She eventually stopped behind the chair and turned to face the Counselor, “I appreciate your directness Lieutenant Commander, I apologize that you had to resort to it. It is evident to me that I still have much room to grow and learn, I will endeavor to make these changes to the best of my ability.” Cadet Trenton remained standing behind the chair still clearly thinking about what was just said, trying to interpret it in other ways to make the most sense.

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

“There are no apologies needed, Cadet. And all of is have to accept that we all must grow and learn. You, me, the Captain… everyone. It is through growth and learning that we can better find our place. Be that on a ship, a station, in a family… wherever we are. And you are not at fault… you are simply at a crossroads where the choice you make here… now… will determine a great deal of what happens to you going forward.”

Korczak, CNS

The Cadet shows a crack in her demeanor, at the mere mention of ‘family’ her jaw tightens and her eyes strain as if to fight back tears. She turned her face away for a moment and held up her index finger to request a pause. “Sorry, excuse me for a moment sir.” Trenton takes a deep breath and turns back to face the Counselor, “Sorry about that, I still have a few things I’m working through but I assure you they’ll have no impact on my ability to preform my duties.”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

Korczak looked at her and gestured to the chair. “Now is a good time to talk about them, if you like. I will not be so arrogant as to say we can solve the issues. But I am confident that I can help you develop the tools you may need to address them productively.”

Korczak, CNS

Trenton looked at the chair for a long moment, considering if she should sit down or not. A strong part of her didn’t want to, but it was up to her to give a little to get anything in return. With another deep calming breath, she moved to sit in the chair once again. “Talking about my family is something I have to do with each counselor I’ve seen, and it is always the hardest. I can’t say everything I want to because of a gag order and what I can say doesn’t always convey everything which only hurts more because I really want help dealing with this. What I can share, they all passed on. I watched it happen. It makes me feel sadness, anger, confusion, and worst of all guilty. It’s compounded with a lack of a sense of belonging among peers that stay in constant contact with family. It’s a constant stabbing reminder when mail and care packages arrive because I know I’ll never have any. Even when in a room surrounded by peers, I still feel alone.”

Trenton takes a moment to wipe her face free of what emotions she was showing, trying to keep herself calm as she explained it. “The loss of my family is the biggest anchor point for a lot of the skeletons in the box, and I’m sure I’ll eventually reach them in time. Until then I try to work my way through more of the surface issues so I can work my way down to be able to deal with them. I currently use Creative Visualization and Compartmentalization to work on my demons in a more manageable format just to give you a basis of what I’m already using. I am open to suggestions that don’t involve me being chemically treated more than I already am.” The last part was meant to be a joke but it fell pretty flat.

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton, Security