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Dael breathed in and thought back for a moment, leaning back in his chair and looking of to the side. Remembering. It hadn’t been all that long ago that he’d first put on a cadet uniform and did his best to do his job. He tapped the PADD in his hands as he formulated his thoughts before looking back at Cadet Whitfield with a small grin.

“I would like to say that I’ve always been responsible, Cadet, but that would be a lie. Shortly before joining the Academy I wasn’t sure what I wanted out of my life, I certainly didn’t expect this.” He gestured to the room around them. “My father is an artist, my mother a bureaucrat and I didn’t know what I wanted to spend my time doing, where my place fit. I just knew it wasn’t theirs. I tried on many hats till I settled into Engineering, but when I did, I went for it. Once I finally had a goal, I pushed through and made sure I was responsible. However, that said…” Dael leaned forward and rested his elbows on his desk, hands clasped at his chin. “…Once I was onboard the Challenger, the responsibilities seemed too much. I just wanted to solve problems and fix things. I thought maybe I had made a mistake and should request to serve on Jupiter Station, or the Shipyards, a place where decisions weren’t needed so quickly and the wrong one can cost real people. But soon, you settle into roles. Not easily, maybe not well at first. I was terrified the first time I was called to the Bridge during a situation where my expertise were needed. Some might jump at the chance, I wanted nothing more than to shrink away from the eyes of the senior staff. But I had a problem to solve, and focusing on that let me do my job, and after that first time the Bridge seemed less scary. And less, and less. Until next thing you know I’m sitting behind this desk talking to the other senior staff daily.”

Dael took in a deep breath before continuing, as the memories faded to the here and now. “I won’t say you won’t be scared, or feel like you’ve made a wrong choice. I won’t say that the responsibilities might seem enormous, even now I’ll admit this newer role is one I’m still working on. I can’t promise you’ll ever feel comfortable, or that you won’t feel like you don’t belong after making a mistake. But I do know that over time, that voice saying all of that starts to sound a little quieter, a little smaller each day and the voice of your crewmates and team becomes louder. Letting you know that you might not feel at your best, but they couldn’t ask for anymore than what you’ve given. Does that help answer your question?”

-Lt. jg Dael Stadi, CE

She glanced down at the PADD as she listened, nodding slowly and remaining sitting in her straight, upright position, unflinching. She was curious as to what other jobs the Chief might’ve tried, but she definitely wouldn’t have expected someone from that background to end up in engineering. She couldn’t exactly say much to that effect though - she was almost a scientist in the middle of nowhere, until she realised that was probably really not for her.

“Yes, sir.” The cadet nodded again, finally, a satisfied smile on her face. It was good to hear that there was some chance of her growing out of her fears yet. “I think I understand.”

“Thank you, sir.” It couldn’t be said how much that conversation helped her and she was afraid to attempt in case of understatement. Still, she smiled cheerfully once more, a weight lifted off her soul. It was impossible not to worry about making mistakes, about trying something that would prove ineffective or potentially worse, but she felt ready - readier than she’d ever been before. She only hoped that her first mistakes wouldn’t be so serious. She stood up, waiting for another moment just in case there was anything left to be said. If she wanted to try and get some work done today, she’d have to hurry to her other engagements.

It would only be so long until she could start helping others, now. Hopefully.

-Cadet Olive Whitfield, Engineer