Edict #8
November 22, 2018
There are many time-honored traditions associated with this day in my fine nation. It?s a day of thankfulness. And a day where the amount of food eaten is only surpassed by the volume of football watched. It?s a day where the truly brave among us plan their shopping adventures in conditions no one would want to shop in at times when no one would want to shop.
On Thanksgiving in the United States the President has an important duty to perform, one which I feel compelled to perform now. I, of course, am speaking of the pardoning of the turkey. In the tradition of my country, I use my authority as President to pardon Mike Montemayor.
Adam W.
President