Posted by Ensign Dradvia (Medical Officer) in Weekly Requirements

Posted by Lieutenant Dr Tealor Tessan (CMO/CNS) in Weekly Requirements

Posted by Ensign Dradvia (Medical Officer) in Weekly Requirements
Posted by… suppressed (49) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
“I want you to be checked in an hour to make sure the anti-inflammatory is working. I’ll leave a note for the shift doctor.” Dradvia said while meticulously putting away the med kit. “I’m sorry you aren’t feeling well, Dr. Tessan.” She turned the lights down, but before leaving, she suddenly turned toward a cabinet and pulled a blanket out for him and laid it over him. Then she left quickly.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor stood up and walked to the window after she left, this was not going to be easy. He spent the next couple hours going through records from back home on how to break through this sort of thing. His head hurt but he would manage, he had to find a way to break through

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

---

The next time Dradvia saw Tessan was her shift. She asked how he was feeling and if there was anything extra she could do. She absolutely tried to mother-hen Tessan in her quiet invisible way. Dradvia took on patients, answered questions, anticipated what needed to be done and did it. Whatever she could to make sure Dr. Tessan only had to sit in his office.

3 days after her last session she was in Sickbay loading a kit to take with her. She was wearing a respirator mask. “Dr. Tessan we have a case of Viridian Flu. The patient is quarantined in his quarters.” A ship this small there was no where else, “but I have to as well.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor looked at her, he was very confused. It was not like her to not follow procedures to the letter. “Who is the patient Ensign, we’ll need to arrange check-ins, and how on earth did you get it, you are always so careful”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“Sisnil Zoi, Sir.” Dradvia turned bright red, her eyes looked everywhere but at Tessan. “Ummm,” she stuttered. “Well, I don’t know that I have it, but I was exposed. I gave myself a booster vaccine.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor looked at her his left eyebrow raised a little, as his mouth parsed into a weird smirk that screamed ‘REALLY ENSIGN’ as his eyes tried to burrow a hole into her conscious. He patted the bio bed put on a respirator and gloves and mumbled something about “having a with that man” he turned back to her. “Well let’s have a look at you then.” erecting a containment field as he did.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia swallowed, looking down at the floor as he gave her that look. Embarrassment and uncertainty filled her. “Oh kay.”

She knew arguing would just drag things out. She needed to get back and check on Sisnil. He had never had the vaccine so his case was already worse than most.

So she sat down on the biobed and let Tessan do his exam.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“So how is he?” he asked as he pulled a blood sample and put it in the scanner.

“102° fever. He can’t keep even water down. He is sweating profusely, and he is showing early signs of dehydration,” Dradvia reported.

“It’s not my place Ensign” he said “But I hope you are being careful” he stated meaning that Sisnil was a dangerous man, but it came out more like a dad having an awkward ‘talk’ with his daughter.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia’s fingers laced together, fidgeting as she twisted them together. “Yes Sir.” She sounded forlorn. The previous night had kept her up late and left her confused, but it had been wonderful too. It was an awkward conversation, but Dradvia also knew what he meant. She had been waiting for it, ever since she had admitted Sisnil was her friend. She hadn’t meant to kiss him, she didn’t mean to have feelings for him, or be so confused by them. She just really liked having a friend. Sisnil was more than that to her, but she knew it could never be more, not… not and be fair to Sisnil.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Ensign,” he said, “so far no real signs presenting in you, but lets see what the blood work says.”

He activate the privacy setting on the containment field, “Ensign, as your counselor I’m required to tell you that , complex relationships can be hard while you are trying make changes in yourself.”

Dradvia knew that. She’d known being friends with Sisnil was a bad idea. It wasn’t fair to Sisnil. She was too broken for any type of relationship, even friendship. He was just so alone. She’d just wanted to help. “Yes, Sir,” she said to her fingers.

He then looked her in the eyes. “As your friend,” he said “I hope we are friends at least a little, I think deep down you two understand each other. ” he said as the blood work beeped and displayed results. “But if you truly care about him, then give both you and him breathing room to figure things out without to much weight on the relationship. ” he said his black eyes reflecting her face back to her. “If you need advice please contact me” he said and looked at the results.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

She still didn’t meet his gaze. She was devastated, but Tessan didn’t need to see her face to know that. “I was just trying to be his friend,” she whispered quietly. The honesty poured off of her. There was more there of course, but Dradvia was too confused by her own emotions and trauma to understand it. What was clear was she just wanted to help Sisnil, and her own feelings of inadequacy.

Her blood work showed she had been exposed to the virus, but the antibodies from her vaccinations were active.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor could tell that she was not tracking so he decided to make it more clear even though it was against his better judgement. He softly lifted her chin so she could look at him. “Ensign, you and he, both deserve to be loved and to love.” he said , had he been using his gifts. “You are an amazing young woman, a brilliant doctor and have so much ahead of you.” he said trying to keep her focused on him. “You deserve to be loved” he said again. “I want you while you are in quarantine to look in the mirror in the morning and in the evening and look your self in the eyes and say it 4 times to your self out loud. “

She nodded quietly and very slightly against his hand on her chin. It made her stomach sick, that touch. She hated that it did. She knew in her head that Tessan was being kind and caring. Everything in her though recoiled from it, afraid. She knew she deserved love, everyone did, she just didn’t believe she was lovable. She knew, now, that she could love, but it wasn’t in a way that anyone deserved.

Tealor realized his mistake when he felt the recoil in his mind, “Oh Ensign, I’m sorry” he said his cheeks flushed letting go of her chin. “I just, you have so much to offer someone, and you are so compassionate, you have been hiding my workload from me since I got hurt, most people would not even bother” he noted. Something must be wrong he thought I have been slipping with my mannerisms he thought

Dradvia shook her head, blinking rapidly several times. “Please don’t apologize. You are kind Dr. Tessan. My brokeness is through no fault of yours. You have been more patient than necessary with me.”

He looked at her with some appreciation that she forgave him. “Ensign, it’s not your fault either” he said leaving it there he did not want to get into it now, but next session, she was hardly broken, she just had trauma and that made her react a certain way.

“I think you should take a portable unit and stay with Zoi until he is better. Since you are already infected”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“I will. He won’t follow directions if he’s not made to. I’m already exposed…” she sighed, “infected.” Great … just great …

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Consider it your work until you are both clear, I expect the usual reports. ” he said there was something in his voice that she had not heard before why the change occurred was anyone’s guess.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

She didn’t know what it was in his voice, but Dradvia was wary of sudden change. “Yes sir. I’ll send them on time.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer
He seemed tired or off. Inside Tearlor had been pulling hard to hold it together, next week was the anniversary of her death, it had been ten years. “Dradiva you are dismissed” he said turning of the field. “Straight to quarters.”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“Yes Sir.” Dradvia wondered if she had done something wrong. It was such a brusque dismissal. She grabbed her kit and hurried back to Sisnil’s quarters to check on her patient.

---

Dradvia had updated her notes meticulously. The Viridian Flu didn’t last long but it was intense. After Sisnil was better she was tired and felt ill herself, but not nearly as bad as he had. A few hours of sleep had cured that. She had gone to sickbay to be checked to make sure she was healthy to return to duty. She could have had someone come to her quarters, but… she just couldn’t.

Her next session with Tessan arrived. He’d given no indication of what they would work on, and she’d only spoken to him briefly during her shifts. She was nervous and uncomfortable thinking about their last conversation.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

As Dadivia came in she immediately noticed the candles around Elara’s photo on his desk. “Hello Ensign” he said. “Please have a seat” he requested as he moved to get her a glass of water and his tea. “How are you feeling?” he asked

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

The candles were new. Dradvia regarded them quietly, but didn’t comment. If Dr. Tessan wanted her to know, he would tell her. “I’m alright. I was a little tired, but never any fever, just some fatigue. I made sure to be cleared before I returned to duty.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor searched trying to get a sense of her emotional stability, the query made his head hurt which caused him to narrow his eyes. It looked more accusatory than it did painful. “So Ensign, what would you like to talk about today?” he asked giving her the option as he was fairly distracted and did not know if he could manage anything telepathic today.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

He looked upset with her. She couldn’t imagine getting checked and cleared would make him mad. So it had to be the fact she needed to get checked. “I’m sorry, Dr. Tessan. I’m always very careful. I didn’t know he had been exposed and hadn’t had that vaccine as a teenager.” Her eyes were staring hard at her fingers. “I… I I did what you suggested. I explained it to him.”

That wasn’t what Dradvia wanted to talk about -her relationship with Sisnil, but it was what needed to be talked about. Her ramble gave Tessan the perfect opening.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

He looked at here his face shifting back to his normal compassionate look. “Your not in trouble Ensign, it happens to us all” he said remembering the time he and Elara had both gotten sick in the same manner. “I’m curious though what did you tell him exactly?” concerned that she had not actually conveyed what he had suggested, because she seemed to think that she was in some sort of trouble for it.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia was wringing her hands and gave that self deprecating shrug. “I told him that I’m not healed and that I can’t… I can only maybe be friends, but I’m not very good at it. That he should find other friends.” That wasn’t what she said at all. That was a nice version, but it was clear that even this nice version broke her heart.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor could tell that she was very sad. She had, as he feared, not really taken in what he was trying to tell her. She could have friends or date she was more than ready for such things even, he just thought it would be best if they both went slow, the man had problems of his own that he needed to work out. “That’s not really what I told you, ” he said softly, “is that what you want?” he asked her. “I feel like you want more?” he suggested.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“It doesn’t really matter what I want.” Dradvia shrugged again. “You said if I truly care about him, then I had to give us both room without the relationship. He’s my friend. I care what happens to him. But you’re right, I need to leave him alone. I … I can’t give him anything. I’m not good for him.” No matter how she felt about him or how Sisnil said he felt. She knew.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Ensign, ” he said to her that may have been what she heard but that is not what he said. “I said that if you loved him that you would give each other some room, to go slow and not put to much weight on the relationship. ” he said. “Meaning don’t get to serious too fast. ” he noted. “I think you and he make a lot of sense. You both understand what the other has been through.” he looked a here and shook his head. “You have so much to give, you are a caring and compassionate woman, I imaging you were trying to figure out a way to help me when you came in the room” he said finally setting the glass down and taking his seat. “You are good for him, and I think in time he’ll be good for you. I was merely suggesting you take the relationship slowly, not to endit.”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“There is nothing to end, Dr. Tessan. There is no relationship. I… I can’t. I’ve told him that.” Sisnil said he didn’t care. He would wait. That he didn’t need anything from her. He just wanted to be around her. That he loved her, and if the occasional hug was it, he was happy. “I can’t love him. I can’t love anyone.” She shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. Being around me is dangerous for him. I could get him killed.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor glanced at the picture on his desk, oh how he missed her. “Why do you feel like you can’t love anyone?” he asked. “You are certainly loveable, and as to the danger well we are in Starfleet Ensign, your lives are in danger every day” he said

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

She shrugged again. “I’ve never been loved. Lokhar said he loved me, but I know he didn’t. I never had parents to love me. I… I murdered the only person I loved. What do I know about it?”

She shook her head. “That’s death not danger. You don’t understand. I’m a runaway slave. If the Syndicate ever finds either of us, they will torture Sisnil for hiding a run away. They won’t kill him or injure him in a fight. They will torture him because of me.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

He new she was right in some ways and very wrong in others. “Based on what I know of Mr Zoi’s current situation that will be the case if he dates you or not.” he said noting a few things down. “You did what she asked you to do and helped her end the very suffering your afraid they will repeat, take responsibility that’s fine but it was not murder and from what i’ve see you both loved each other very much. So you know more than you give yourself credit for” he paused and looked at the picture. “What do you think love is?”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Another shrug, this one was resigned rather than self-loathing. “Being able to comfort someone. Give affection, trust, to put their needs before your own when they need it. To give as much as you receive.” Isn’t that what her books said?

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor glanced at Elara’s picture, “That is all true,” he said not looking at Davida and then back to ELara, “It’s more, sometimes it’s hard so hard that you think if it were to continue your heart would break into a million pieces. ” he said a small tear pooling in his left eye. “Sometimes, the joy of it is so much that it feels the same, if you move they move too and you can’t contain i” he said .”Some times there is so much peace in just being around them that you never want to leave.” he said looking back to her, tears pouring out of his eyes. “Sometime you would do whatever they ask to end their suffering.” he said wiping his eyes something in his expression suggested that there was more.

He cleared his throat, “You can and are capable of love Ensign” he finally said.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Perhaps, but not in a way that people deserved. That wasn’t pressing now. “Dr. Tessan are you alright?” She asked gently.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Its just a hard day for me Ensign, I’m sorry, this is your time” he said. “I don’t think you give yourself enough credit.” he looked at here “You are so quick to help others it’s a gift” he said, he was not composed, and his emotions were right on the surface today, something she had never seen.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

She flushed. It wasn’t praise but an observation. It was easier to accept. “Perhaps, but I think you need the time more right now.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor looked at her , he wanted so much to morn and not alone like every year but with someone who could be there for him.. “Ensign sometimes we latch on to a decision that we think was wrong, and we surround ourselves in it, like a warm familiar blanket. We hold it.” He continued , because it familiar even though its scratchy , and would be better if we took on a new one. ” he said looking toward the picture once more, “she died ten years ago, today”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia didn’t know the day Kryssa died. They didn’t have access to calendars on Lokhar’s ship. A clock was all, to make sure they were always on time. She only knew about how long it had been. Her heart went out to Tessan. The loss of someone so vital never got easier. She didn’t know how to help him though. “I… I am not familiar with Betazoid customs, but is there something special you would like to do in her memory? I… I could sit with you if you like.” She remembered their first session how they had both lamented how people tried to direct their grief and tell them how to feel or how to act. They could never just feel it in their own way.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

He new Dradvia too well at this point, she was not going to focus on herself. He would appologise to her next time. “I would like that, someone to sit with me” he said. “I’m normally alone, you can ask questions if you want I don’t mind thinking about it” he said with a pause, “It’s just hard”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

It was lost on Dradvia that she was doing the exact thing she just claimed she couldn’t do. Put the needs of someone she cared about before herself. To take care of their needs over her own. She did care about Tessan. Dradvia cared about everyone, but he was more a mentor than just her boss. She wasn’t sure what to ask though. “Why don’t you tell me about her.” That was maybe too broad. “How did you meet her?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor closed his eyes, he could see it like it was yesterday. “She was so beautiful, time stopped the first time she entered the classroom” he cooed, “I thought I was going to die my heart pounded so fast. ”

“we were in biology together in Prep school, she was so smart, and I was so shy back then.”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia could feel his emotions just from his voice. “Did she have to talk to you first?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor searched his memory like a movie real. “Ha,” laughed, “I’m not sure I would call it talking, her first words to me were “Uggg let me do it” he chuckled, “I was not very good at biology at the time. She was so mad that she got me for a lab partner”
Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia smiled. “She forgave you though. How did you make it up to her?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Well she was fine, just frustrated with my lack of understanding, we spent a lot of time together on that project.” he said smiling “We were able to communicate telepathically, which was so much easier for the both of us.” he said the memory producing soft tears. “We even communicated late at night when we were supposed to sleep, after that we were rarely apart.” he looked over at Dradvia, “She fell in love with me as we talked to each other remotely about life and other things. It was more gradual for her”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

“Maybe not,” Dradvia said. “Maybe she was just cautious, afraid to say something. Unsure.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I don’t know , it’s one of the memories she did not share with me.” he said, “She was always calculating and cautious, and when it came to love,” he paused. “Uneasy” he said finding the right word. “So I imagine that was the case.” he said. “But once she loved, she loved hard!” he said remembering. “You know earth people have a saying, Happy Wife Happy Life” he said, “But with us, it was so bi-directional, if we had made it to marriage , it would have been Happy Spouse, Happy House” he said growing more somber again. “We both sacrificed everything for each other.” he then started to cry hard laying his head down on his desk.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia didn’t know how to help him. After a moment she tentatively set her hand over his forearm, trying to offer him some comfort. She thought perhaps he needed to cry, so she didn’t try to stop him.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor just cried for a few minutes, he gave her hand a tap and sat up wiping his eyes. “Thank you” he said trying to compose himself. “ssssss” he said as he grabbed his forehead.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia let go of his arm as soon as he tapped her hand. Her brow burrowed in concern as he hissed. She stood and got him a glass of water and brought it over. Crying like that could cause headaches, she knew from experience. And dehydrate you. The water would help some at least.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer
“thank you” he said sucking down the entire glass, he looked over at her, “Did I ever tell you how she died?” he looked back to the picture and picked it up.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia got him another glass and set it in front of him. “No, you didn’t.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“she worked with infectious diseases, was on a mission” he noted. “shuttle failed on take off and crashed, I was in telepathic contact with her the entire time”

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine

Dradvia’s gasp was audible. She didn’t know what to say. She didn’t think there was anything she could say. She bit her lip slightly. “Would… would it be alright if I gave you a hug?” She had a hard time with contact, but Sisnil had been helping her with it, making it on her terms without any pressure. And she’d rediscovered how much it helped sometimes.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Tealor’s eyes narrowed, “I could use a hug, if your ok with it?” he said a little shocked, he remained seated, thinking that her having control of it.

Dr Tealor Tessan
Chief Medical Officer U.S.S Wolverine