Posted by Ensign Dradvia (Medical Officer) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully

Posted by Civilian Sisnil Zoi (Intelligence Consultant) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully

Posted by Ensign Dradvia (Medical Officer) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully
Posted by… suppressed (77) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
He did smile a little bit. “If you build me a time ship, we’ll never have met. I don’t think I can live with that, either.” Sisnil said, grinning at her.

~ Zoi

Dradvia was sure that would affect her more than it would him. “If you warn yourself ahead of time, you will alter the future and you won’t know you never met me.” Her smile was sad, “You’d be with your crew, with Vash, and Noril. That’s much better than here.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Hmm.” Sisnil said, like he couldn’t decide. “Let’s think about something else,” he said at last. Otherwise he’d cry and he’d not stand for that.

~ Zoi

“Okay.” Dradvia looked around the scene, “How… how did you learn to do all that? I’ve only ever seen military groups pull some of that off.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I’ve had ex military crew before, but honestly? You get good, or you get dead,” Sisnil said with a shrug. “We have to be better than Starfleet, to steal from Starfleet.”

~ Zoi

“You taught yourself all of that?” Dradvia waved to the holodeck scene around them. She was impressed, she couldn’t imagine learning all that without a teacher… well maybe she could. She had taught herself a lot about medicine in the same way. “Necessity.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. “Necessity.” He looked at Dee, “Noril and I bought our ship intending to be honest freighters. Things just… Didn’t turn out that way.”

~ Zoi

Her head tipped to the side, “What happened?” There was no judgement, just curiosity and willingness to listen.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Work wasn’t very… Plentiful.” Sisnil said. “Then.... Well, the Syndicate happened. Trying to make money, we stepped on their toes.” Sisnil gave her a look, she knew what that meant.

~ Zoi

Dradvia nodded. “You were good. So rather than put you out of commission, they decided to profit off of you. If you hadn’t agreed, they would have killed you all.” She had been privy to some of those ‘negotations’. Lokhar was very pleased to show her off. She had been a prized possession. He used Kryssa to read people’s minds, and kept her close by to control Kryssa.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Exactly. We all became Syndicate members. My ability to read minds made me more valuable than some others. One of our crew was killed on the spot.” Sisnil shrugged, “It was years ago now, it is what it is.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia wasn’t surprised they had killed someone. Usually the one they felt was the least useful. Sometimes it was who was the biggest threat. The Syndicate preferred to keep them though. “I’m sorry about your friend.” She sighed. “Why is life always so hard?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil shrugged. “Bad luck?” It had been the “least useful”, a newer crew member with little experience. The death hadn’t been quick. He hadn’t deserved that. “I’ve gotten… A little numb to losing people.” He said with a shrug.

~ Zoi

Dradvia stared intently at him. She didn’t believe that. He had just got good at pushing through and burying the emotions. She wasn’t going to call him on it. Allowing yourself to be numb was sometimes the only way to get through. “What about your crew now? You have a medic? What is he like? Other than yelling at you?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“His name’s Eli, he’s… Well, what you’d expect of an ex-combat medic.” Sisnil said with a little chuckle. “It helps, my crew can be stubborn as all the hells, but he can handle them. There’s John, he’s part of my crew. Stubborn and abrasive but good at what he does. Engineering. And Nathan, my first mate and our weapons expert.”

~ Zoi

“Good engineers are underrated. Mako… he was taken a few months after us. He was really good. Lokhar found out. He was put to work in engineering. 4 month later he was ‘employeed’ rather than…” Well, Sisnil knew. “I was happy for him.”

“He’s lucky.” Sisnil said.

She looked confused, “Noril isn’t your first mate?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“We’re co-captains.” Sisnil said. “We work together. With me gone, well… It’s just Noril now. He’s never been as… Assertive as I am. I hope he’s alright.”

~ Zoi

“He will be. He didn’t get this far and not learn. You said so. I am sure Vash and Eli will keep him that way. Yeah?” She couldn’t help the slight twinge of jealousy that she hoped she tramped down before he noticed. She had no right to be jealous of any of them, but she was. They had each other.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“If they don’t, I’d put money on John being the one to backstab him.” Sisnil said as if making a completely normal, casual comment.

~ Zoi

“He must be really good to keep him around if you think he would betray the crew,” Dradvia observed.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“He is very good, but he’s also the most unpredictable and the most hardheaded. When I was there, I sensed no question in his loyalty. But with a weaker leader… I am less sure of him.” Sisnil shrugged, “Nothing I can do about it now.”

~ Zoi

“He’ll be okay. He may defer to you when together, but I’m sure he can stand on his own. He’ll be okay.” She cautiously reached over and set her hand on his arm. “Can he pass your training programs?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“We compete and see who does better.” Sisnil said. “There’s thing I’m good at and things he’s good at.” He shrugged, “Guess I’ll find out once you get that message out.” He appreciated her touch. Sisnil was a physical person. It had been hard for him, since meeting her, to refrain from touching her.

~ Zoi

Dradvia nodded. Perhaps she could find a way to get a message back from them. “So his style might be a bit different, play to his strengths, but he’ll be okay.” Dradvia had been an affectionate child, but that had been… her time in the Syndicate had killed that. It had been hard though, not to have anyone to lean on, confide in, be close to. She couldn’t manage it though. She was too afraid now.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. He set a hand gently on hers. “We’ll both keep doing what we do. Keep moving on.” He said and smiled.

~ Zoi

A tremor went through her at his touch. Fear or delight was uncertain, but she didn’t pull away. She would handle this so she could help him right now. “That’s all any of us can do. It’s not all bad. Maybe not ever great, but not all bad. You have time to work on your programming.” Dradvia was rambling now, unsure what to do or say.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil laughed. “The only challenging thing I’ve done was the gardens, and I accomplished that in one day. I think I’d rather test myself against the Security department or something. Though,” he winked at her, “I might need a doctor on call if I do that.”

~ Zoi

“Well,” she blushed just from a wink. “I might excuse those injuries since it’s real people.” Her head tipped slightly. “Why don’t you do that? There are open training sessions for all crew members, and holodeck programs available for whomever wants to use them.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“My holodeck programs are better,” Sisnil said with a shrug. “I can see if they’ll let me join a training session… Just because Morris is all ‘you’re crew’ doesn’t mean everyone else is. Stevens proves that.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia shook her head. “Stephens isn’t the whole crew. Besides that has nothing to do with who you are except a rival for me.” She shuddered, pulling her hand back to hug herself, rubbing her arms against the chill she felt. “If you weren’t around me, he would never bother you.” Dradvia hated it. It made her feel worthless, like an object.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I’m a mind reader, Dee, he’s not the only one. I haven’t sensed that kind of thing from the senior staff, at least. But…” He shrugged and sighed. He looked at her and smiled, “He sees you like that. I don’t and I never will.”

~ Zoi

She looked at him sad and a little lost. “I know you don’t, Sisnil.” Dradvia rubbed her arms again. “You know people can’t see you as part of a group if you never join the group. You spend time around me. That won’t get you around the crew.” Dradvia was too shy to ‘hang out’ around people. She preferred to blend into the wall with the crowd around.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil shrugged. “I don’t… I mean… I guess they’re not my crew so I’ve been avoiding them.” He said at last. “I mean, there’s enough people aboard this ship to be a small town.”

~ Zoi

“I get it.” She did. She didn’t feel connected to anyone, couldn’t trust complete strangers. There was no one… Dradvia glanced up at his face and looked away as heat flushed her cheeks. There was Sisnil. “Can’t trust them. You know why I go? I mean I don’t hang out with them, or join events often, but I like to know who is around, who belongs, who doesn’t, where they are supposed to be, who is likely to lose their temper, or be abrasive. So I know what to expect.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. “I look for similar things, but I’m also looking for who I can trust, who is likely to backstab me or hurt me.” He glanced around, as if expecting someone to jump out of the shadows. “Who is ‘safe’ and who has it in them to kill me.”

~ Zoi

“Exactly that.” She did the same, except she never found anyone she could trust. “I prefer to know the degree of threat. If I learned anything, everyone has the ability to stab you in the back if given the right incentive.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“True, but it depends on what that incentive is. For Eli, it would have to be something very strong, very personal.” Sisnil said. “For Noril… Well, there isn’t a thing in the world we’d backstab each other for. But for others… Maybe the right amount of money. Maybe a better position.” He shrugged. “My Syndicate training makes it easy for me to discern these things without so much as a word.”

~ Zoi

“Reading minds doesn’t hurt either,” she said. It was serious, but she smiled at him. “It depends on the person I guess. The only thing I am ever sure of is that everyone will betray me given the right incentive.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I think I’d die without my telepathy,” Sisnil said. He smiled sadly at her. “I wish I could tell you different. But I’ve been backstabbed too many times for that.”

~ Zoi

“Same. Most of the time I want to know the truth, rather than someone try to soften reality for me. But,” she shrugged, “There are some things I wish I didn’t know, that I had been shielded from. I’m better off knowing, I just wish I didn’t sometimes.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. “We all have things like that. Right now, held by Starfleet, it’s not just that kind of thing I wish I didn’t know, but valuable Syndicate secrets that put me at risk from both sides.”

~ Zoi

“Yeah. And they both expect, they demand, undying loyalty without earning it.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Every organization expects that,” Sisnil said. “How they go about enforcing it… That’s what’s important.”

~ Zoi

“I guess,” Dradvia said. He wasn’t wrong, but it was a fine line that didn’t excuse what either organization forced people to do. “That’s why my word means something to me. These groups, the people in charge just throw around words like air to breathe. It means nothing to them. But they suffocate people when you take it away. I won’t be like that.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. “In my world, all that matters are actions, because it’s all too often words are meaningless.” He shrugged, “It is the way it is.”

~ Zoi

“I know,” she agreed. “I don’t take anyone at their word, and I don’t expect anyone to believe mine. It only matters to me.” Being loyal to herself.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. He could see how it would end up that way for her. He closed his eyes. “Then at least you have found that for yourself.”

~ Zoi

“I guess,” Dradvia shrugged feeling shy. “It’s a very lonely existence that way. Unable to take anyone at their word or their actions. I’m alive, so I guess that’s something.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil shrugged. “I guess it is.” It occured to him, that was partly why he was so lonely. Because Noril and Vash he could trust. Everyone here, except Dee, was a potential enemy.

~ Zoi

“Well, I guess we’ll just be lonely together. What’s that Earth saying? Misery loves company.” Dradvia rubbed her arms one more time. “So, what do you want to do now?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Something distracting and time consuming,” Sisnil said with a sigh. “Until it’s late enough to go to sleep.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia nodded, “Do you want to do another training session? I’m not any good at poker, but we could play cards. I mean, what do people do for fun?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil thought for a moment and then looked at her. “I’m not sure. What do you think is fun? Is it fun to watch me train? Or is it fun the play cards even if you’re not that good at it? Or what about the hologarden?”

~ Zoi

“The hologarden is soothing, calming. Umbra is fun and the koi. I enjoy the garden. That’s fun for me. I like swimming.” She did find watching him train fun. Well she enjoyed watching him. “Watching you train is fun. It’s interesting, and you find it fun.” That wasn’t the whole truth, but she wasn’t ready to admit anything else. “I can sit quietly with nothing to do for a long time. I like games, even if I don’t know them. I… I used to like movies.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I’ll show you some of my favourite movies sometime. Not today though, I’m not in the mood for movies.” He considered, “Let me do some more training. Assuming I ever do get away, I can’t be out of practice.”

~ Zoi

“I’d like that.” She stood up and stepped back so the program could adjust. “You shouldn’t get out of practice anyway. It’s good for your health, as long as the safeties are on.” She was being slightly bossy sounding, but her internal mirth made it clear she was teasing.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil set a new program. “It’s more fun with the safeties off,” he complained, making his voice sound like a whiny child.

Then he was off, doing another training course. It was the same kind of thing, a computer generated ‘mission’. It kept him fit physically and in practice in terms of his ‘job’. In this one, he even had to fist-fight someone.

~ Zoi

The fist fight was too much for Dradvia. She almost intervened before she reminded herself it was fake. She had to turn away and not watch while it happened. She closed her eyes and focused on counting her breaths. She was calm when he finished and waiting for him. “Okay, okay I am totally impressed.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil grinned. “Good.” He stretched, “These are important skills, you know,” he said and then laughed.

~ Zoi

Dradvia laughed, “I believe that. I doubt you would put anything in these programs that you haven’t needed before.” Her nose wrinkled as she thought. “But… how challenging are the hacking parts? You wrote the program and the computer is only as smart as the programmer. So, it can’t outthink you.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“I set it up to create scenarios, but you’re right, there’s only so much it can do.” He shrugged, “I’ve already breached the ship’s core, so I must not be slipping yet.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia put her hands over her ears, “La la la, I didn’t hear that. I did not hear anything. LA lala lala la.” She was teasing him.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil grinned. “What, did I say something?” He joked and elbowed her. “I think I’m done training for the day. I’ll be too sore if I do anymore.”

~ Zoi

She dropped her hand when he elbowed her. “Well I recommend water, a meal heavy in protein and a hot shower so nothing tightens up.” Dradvia grinned. She could think of other things, but they only half formed in her head, pushed away before she knew they were there. “So what else is fun?” The chime on the holosuite went off indicating someone else had reserved time. “Well no garden today.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“That’s okay, it’ll be here.” Sisnil ended the program. “Let’s go and decide what else is fun somewhere else.” He said as he headed for the door. “Maybe you’ll come with me while I get that protein heavy meal?”

~ Zoi

Drasvia nodded as the walked out the door. “Of course. I have to make sure you understand proper nutrition,” she said in her most professional, take no nonsense voice. The thought of the lounge, though, suddenly made her feel ill.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil took her hand before he remembered she didn’t like touch and let it go again. “You’ll be fine. We can even get food and then take it somewhere else if it makes you more comfortable.”

~ Zoi

As he let go, her fingers tangled with his, holding on. They trembled slightly in his grip. She was more than nervous, her anxiety and stress had shot up from fear. Stevens always seemed to show up when she was in the lounge. Just the thought of another confrontation made her hunch into herself and feel sick. She wanted to go somewhere else, but, “I shouldn’t have to hide.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

When she held on, he took her hand again. “Okay then, let’s go,” he said, and he led her to the lounge. At the replicator he stopped and looked at her. “So, Ms doctor nutritionist, what should I eat?”

~ Zoi

She was uncomfortable holding his hand, but not agraid or nervous. It was extremely unfamiliar, but she felt calmer like that. “I would suggest grilled poultry and beef, with a bean and corn picco on a tortilla. Served with brown rice,” Dradvia said after thinking a moment. She input the order, and got the same for herself. She wasn’t hungry, but she had to eat. Her eyes darted around, looking for potential trou le, which mostly meant Stevens, but she didn’t see him.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil picked a corner table where he could both protect Dee and surgery the room and sat down with her. He sniffed his food like he’d never seen such a thing in his life. Then he pointed at the beans. “What are these?”

~ Zoi

She pointed at each one, “Black, red, and kidney beans. They are legumes from earth. They are actually high in protein. They are actually quite good. Here,” she used his fork to unwrap the tortilla and placed a small scoop of beans on it. Then she handed it to him.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“They look like hatha poop.” Sisnil complained. She handed him some on his fork and he reluctantly tried them. “They’re… not as bad as they look,” he admitted slowly. He rewrapped the tortilla and tried it altogether. “They’re a little better with everything else.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia snorted and covered her face and nose. Her drink burned, bit luckily she didn’t spit it out. “They do look strange,” she agreed. She took a bite of her own and sighed. “They are not as good as Risan beans, but they good with the other stuff.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil smiled, she so rarely laughed or showed any sign of happiness or amusement. He ate the bean tortilla and then went to work on the rice and meats. “If Risan beans don’t look so much like they don’t belong on my plate, I’d be happy to try them,” he said, and grinned at her.

~ Zoi

“No, they don’t. They’re bigger and longer. They would fit the tortilla. Sometimes they get cut up smaller. Especially for toddlers.” She didn’t finish the wrap before she moved on to the rice and chicken. “They can be cooked lots of ways. I like them sautéed.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Then next time we get the chance, I’ll try them.” Sisnil said as he ate his food. He pointed his fork at the wrap, “Was it that bad?”

~ Zoi

“No, it’s good,” she assured him. “I just don’t have much of an apatite. I just watched. You did all the rigorous stuff.” She finished a few more bites, forcing herself to do it. “Maybe I can get some fresh. They aren’t bad raw either. We used to go help the elderly man that lived near the orphanage. He grew beans and we would help him pick them. He never fussed when we ate nearly as much as we picked.” Dradvia smiled over the memory.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil smiled too. “That sounds nice.” He said. He finished his food and his water. “We’ll get out hands on some. Hopefully soon.”

~ Zoi

“It was fun. He always told great stories and had treats for us. He was the closet thing we all had to a grandfather.” She turned sad, “I don’t know what happened to him.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil’s smile faded slightly. “I’m sorry.” He said softly. “At least he was there for you for a while.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia smiled very softly. “I know, and I’m great full for that. My.childhood was actually pretty great. I mean, it was hard being an orphan, but Ms. Myri’ka cared about us and did her best. What about you and Noril? Any good childhood memories?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Uh, well....” There were, but he was having trouble thinking of anything worth telling. “I’m sure there are, but I can’t think of anything right now.”

~ Zoi