Posted by Civilian Sisnil Zoi (Intelligence Consultant) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully

Posted by Ensign Dradvia (Medical Officer) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully

Posted by Civilian Sisnil Zoi (Intelligence Consultant) in You Have To Trust Someone Eventaully
Posted by… suppressed (32) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
Sisnil sat next to her - also facing the room. But the way he sat was placing himself between her and the room. He’d ordered himself some Orion food. Eating it seemed to bring him some sadness and longing. Even so, his attention was always on those around them.

~ Zoi

Dradvia wasn’t so upset that she was unobservant. She noticed how Sisnil sat, blocking the room from her. Giving her space from the crowd. He also didn’t block her in. She also noticed he seemed sad. Her hand almost moved towards his. “Sisnil? What’s wrong?”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Oh. You know. Just… Vash cooks this.” Sisnil shrugged and forced a smile. “‘S alright. It’s just food, anyway.” He said softly, half heartedly. “I’ll be fine, Dee.” He said.

~ Zoi

“Tell me about her.” There wasn’t anyone else Sisnil could talk to about, well, anything. Dradvia also knew how much it could hurt to not be able to talk about or openly remember the people that were important.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

There wasn’t. It was part of what made them so close, that people like Stevens couldn’t understand. “If she were here right now, she’d set her hand on my arm, like this,” he mimed it on the table, knowing she wouldn’t want to be touched. “and say everything will be okay.” Sisnil looked at her, “Vash is part Deltan, but she’d never manipulate my emotions without knowing I was okay with it. She wouldn’t make the loneliness, the emotional pain, go away, but she’d dull it. Make it more bearable.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia guessed they were closer than most people. With her Deltan empathy and his Betazoid telepathy. It must make the three of them really close. “Vash is kind of like the mother hen, huh? Makes sure you’re feeling okay, makes sure everyone eats, and stuff.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil thought about it. “I guess so.” He finished his food and pushed the tray aside. “She’s not the only one, though. Our medic’ll let you have it if you’re not making his job easier.” He grinned, “He likes to pretend he doesn’t care.”

~ Zoi

“It makes it easier,” Dradvia said. “When people are scared and hurting and they depend on you for comfort and to save them… it helps to pretend you don’t care.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil looked at her, “Do you do that?” He asked. He couldn’t see her pretending she didn’t care. Even with his training mishap, she’d been incredibly concerned and worried.

~ Zoi

Dradvia nodded slowly, “Sometimes. Not so much anymore, ya know.” She twirled her fork in the beans watching it for a moment. Remembering. “Now, I have access to the best medical equipment and treatments. I don’t see anything that can’t be taken care of. Before, though,” she looked up at him. “They get so scared, so it starts as a way to reassure them. Don’t show your shock or concern. Be really analytical so they stay calm. Then sometimes it is so bad it becomes an intellectual thing because you know you can’t do anything. They will live, but maimed. Eventually though the guilt and fear and anger starts to eat at you, so you have to hide even from yourself. Eventually, that bleeds into everything. Your friendships, your meals, yourself. The emotions are still there, but they belong to someone else.”

Her shoulders slumped, and she twirled her fork again. “I never fooled Kryssa though.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Never fool me, either,” Sisnil said. He had been the hurt one before, and while he wasn’t maimed, it hadn’t been clear whether he’d make it. He liked to know not be lied to.

~ Zoi

She looked up at him, “I didn’t mean it like that. I never lie to people. I meant about how scared I was. How much it hurt to lose someone, to not be able to help.” She held her hands out, palms up, helpless. “If I panic and cry, they will do worse. If Every case gets to me, eventually I won’t function and can’t help. Kryssa always knew how much it all got to me.” She studied his face for a moment, “I imagine you will too.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil nodded. “I will. My empathy is pretty strong.” He sat back in his seat, “I probably won’t be as helpful as she was.” He’d seen plenty of terrible, and he’d been unable to help. But he’d shut down the part of himself that cared that deeply a long time ago.

~ Zoi

Her mind glee backwards to that time. To a brown haired young girl. Black eyes full of fear and pain. “Kryssa, wasn’t really helpful. I hated she could feel it. I hated I couldn’t hide it from her. It made everything worse for her.” She shook her head, “Her telepathy… was out of control. She hadn’t had it long before we were taken. There was no one to teach her.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil seemed to almost wince at that. “Then I’ll be a lot more helpful than Kryssa.” In an environment like that.... Well, it was no wonder what happened, happened. “It takes practice to learn to separate other emotions from your own.” He said, voice gentle. “All the negativity around her… And the telepathic defense of a teenager. It would’ve been torture. I’m sorry.”

~ Zoi

That one word brought back flashes of screaming, burning pain, endless agony. “They… they used that to torture us.” It was too painful to talk about. “Kryssa was a pure soul. The vileness never changed that, but in the end she took the only escape possible.”

Sisnil looked like he mightnl hug her, but he refrained from doing so. “I understand why.” Was all he said.

“Thank you.” Dradvia understood from her perspective. She saw what it did to Kryssa, and would have done anything to have endured it all in her place.

She took a bite of her food, “So, I get your medic acting like he doesn’t care. You said he was a battlefield medic before he joined you. He’s seen the worst up close, the first to get to people, trying to hold them together till someone with the skill can save them. He had to fight for that detachment early. Otherwise it will destroy you.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil grinned, “Wait till he’s in your face telling you to shut up or he’ll let you die,” he said and chuckled. “As a Betazoid, and moreso as a Syndicate operative made to use my abilities in a way most people never would… Well, trying to pretend or hide from me doesn’t have much point.”

~ Zoi

Dradvia smiled a little. “Maybe not, but it’s just as much for him as it is for you. Then again,” her eyes danced at him for a moment, “After seeing your stubborn way of ‘dealing with an injury,’ I can see why he would yell at you.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Stubborn?” Cried Sisnil playfully. “I even let you take me to sickbay!” He said and elbowed her very gently. “Next time I’ll show you stubborn.” He was grinning and trying not to laugh.

~ Zoi

Dradvia gave him a stern look, that would have been effective except for her internal amusement. “I will have you know, Mr. Zoi, that I can be equally stubborn. Next time, should you be more stubborn, I will let you suffer rather than just telling you I should.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

That looks almost rivalled Vash’s and turned his stupid grin more sheepish. “Right, right, we’ll see.” He said. If it came to blows between himself and Stevens, ‘next time’ may not be that far off. Stevens was way bigger than him.

~ Zoi

Dradvia grinned as if she had just won something, and it made her look adorable. “Yes we will, won’t we. But there will be no more holodeck accidents.” She gave him a mock glare and then finished her food.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil laughed, “I can still trip and break something with the safeties on.” He commented as he stacked her tray on his own.

~ Zoi

Dradvia gave him a full once over, “You are not nearly that clumsy.” She flushed furiously as he walked away with their trays. She must be more upset over Stevens than she thought to act so outrageous. That was what she was telling herself anyway.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

He put the trays away and returned to her. “Maybe I will be just so I can come see you.” He said. He wouldn’t really do that, being hurt was too dangerous. Too unsafe. But he could joke about it to rile Dee up.

~ Zoi

Pink, her cheeks were noticeably very pink and felt hot. He didn’t have to make up excuses to come see her. His banter was relaxing as it distracted her. “If you do that, I will confine you to sickbay under Nurse Cranston’s care.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil didn’t know Nurse Cranston, but it wasn’t Dradvia, so it wasn’t good enough for him. “I’ll hack into the system and lock out her controls.” He said.

~ Zoi

Dradvia set her arms on the table and grinned. “Hard to access a computer when you are under restraint on a biobed. Oh, and so you know, Cranston is a very cantankerous matron, who is more than capable of nursing you without all that shiny technology. You might get her out of the computer, but not away from caring for you.” She leaned toward him, “But if that isn’t enough of an incentive to not purposely get hurt, I will have to come up with something more devious.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil leaned towards her, careful not to violate her space. “Don’t threaten me with a good time, Dee. I’d love to see what you come up with.” He said and grinned, charming and playful.

~ Zoi

Just like that, Dradvia felt heat start at her toes and rush all the way to her head. Her gaze was tranfixed on his grin. He was the most attractive man she had ever met. Everything about him, especially his personality, made her heart race and stomach flutter. At those realizations, her instincts screamed at her to leave, back off, get away, flee.

But a very quiet almost completely lost part of her, urged her to stay just a bit longer. To keep bantering with him, even for a moment. It was okay, Sisnil would not hurt her.

She gave him another once over, her gaze slightly clinical, “Hmmmm, I might need to put you under observation if devious mean doctor orders are your idea of fun. You may have hit your head during that training accident yesterday.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil sensed her unease, but she stayed, even managed to throw banter back his way. He grinned. “They’re only fun if you’re in the room with me.” He commented. He rubbed his head, “Hmm… No bumps, no tenderness, nothing on scans… I think you’re out of luck there.”

~ Zoi

Her eyes laughed, “Not necessarily. I didn’t scan your head, because there ware no signs of concussion after so long. But that doesn’t mean there might be delayed swelling on the brain, putting pressure. Another scan might be in order.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“No memory issues, no headaches, no blurry vision,” Sisnil listed competitively, “Come on, Dee, I was a criminal, I know how to watch for concussions.” He said and grinned again.

~ Zoi

“Brain swelling doesn’t have the exact same symptoms as concussion. Lowered inhibitions can be a sign of swelling or a brain bleed.” She tapped her finger on the table, “Of course, that is also a rare side effect of the anti-inflammatory I gave you. Happens in less than 1 percent of people. That could be you. You are pretty unique.” DID SHE JUST SAY THAT?!

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

Sisnil laughed out loud, both because of what she said, and her internal reaction to it. “Hmmm… Maybe I do need a check over. I am unique after all. I’ve had a rare side effect before.” It was, surprisingly, true. He’d been young though, and so his medical records were long gone.

~ Zoi

Dradvia leaned slightly closer, “Oh really? I distinctly remember asking you if you had any allergies. What exactly was this rare side effect?” Dradvia expected he would say something outrageous that would make her blush again.

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer

“Side effects aren’t allergies.” Sisnil said. “But if you must know…” He beckoned her closer as if he was going to tell her a secret.

~ Zoi

“No, but rare side effects can range feom odd to worse.” He was like a magnet and she was drawn to him. His charm was irresistible. She hesitated for 3 heartbeats, but her curiosity over what he might say drew her closer. “I am your doctor, I think you had better tell me.”

Ens. Dradvia, Medical Officer