Posted by Civilian Jeannette Mathis (Federation Ambassador) in Federation Embassy

Posted by Civilian Revna Freya McKenzie (Resident) in Federation Embassy

Posted by Civilian Jeannette Mathis (Federation Ambassador) in Federation Embassy
Posted by… suppressed (10) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Jeanette surfaced downstairs from the residence around 1100 hours. She was, all told, less hungover than a few hours ago, but she still didn’t feel great. Normally alcohol had little effect on her, but then again she had lost track how much her, Ren and Eela had actually drunk. It was a lot.

She greeted the staff she came upon, but there was little emotion to any of it. Mathis stepped into her office and stared at the Federation flag on display. One of many around the embassy. Her hands could feel the folded flag the officers had placed in her hands yesterday. A flag was a such a light object, but in that moment it felt so terribly heavy, imbued with all the sacrifices over the years- her own and those of others, like Dash.

She missed him more than she could say. As she sat in the large chair at her desk, everything felt more dim. Jeanette knew that would change at some point, and she of course had a duty to fulfill here regardless of who was or wasn’t working at her side, but she lacked the vigour and determination in this moment. Until that strange feeling passed, she was going to sit here. She could not afford to make mistakes or let things fall through the cracks. Oed and the Vren would never forgive her, nor would she forgive herself.

“It wasn’t supposed to be this way,” she said softly, knowing all too well that the voice she most wanted to hear would not reply. There would be no pep talk from her best-friend, her brother.

It all just… hurt.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna had not known Dash or even met him. She had arrived after he had passed. However she had handled any official business the Embassy had yesterday. She was back early the next morning, making sure everything was running smoothly. Her heart went out to Jeanette and Dash’s family.

Revna had just finished a call with the Vren contingency about confirming the new schedule for meetings. She had arranged security, both Star Fleet and Oed CCDA (to unsure Oedian intrests) along with the Vren security. Food had been arranged and reminders sent out to all invested parties. Revna heard Mathis come down the stairs. She waited roughly half an hour before she knocked softly on the office door.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Sound drew Jeanette from… somewhere. Shaking herself out of her daze, she turned to face the door. “Come in,” she called out, resting an arm on the desk. She would do as she had always done in the face of great difficulties and simply persevere.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna walked in carrying a tray. She set it down in the coffee table in the sitting area and picked up a glass full of a bubbly orange drink and a hypo. “IRN-BRU, my husband and his brothers swear by this for hangovers. I thought you would prefer this to our Norwegian remedy.” Revna decided not to describe it in case Mathis’ stomach chose to revolt. “And I brought a hypo of an over the counter pain medication if you would like it.” She set both on the desk.

The corners of her mouth tugged ever so slightly upwards. “That obvious, or a reasonable guess?” She hoped she didn’t look that hungover, but Jeanette wasn’t sure exactly would happen if she did. Would anyone really care?

“Then I have tea, coffee, and toast for you.” She sat down opposite Mathis and waited.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mathis drew in a deep breath and sighed, breaking into a soft and resigned smile. “Thank you, Revna. It’s very kind of you.” She reached for the hypo, glanced at the setting and administered a dose. “That should save my spouse at least one worry, since I brushed off the headache earlier.”

Mathis reached over and pulled the vibrant orange fizzing glass towards her, eyeing it suspiciously. “This on the other hand, I’m not sure about. Seems risky,” she said, though there was a slight gleam in her eyes.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna didn’t laugh out of care for Jeannette’s head, but she did grin. “Carbonated soda. It’s an interesting flavor, but not bad. Been around for centuries, and every Scott I’ve met, swears by it.”

With more trepidation than she might have shown when she was feeling better, Jeannette took a small sip of the vibrant orange drink. At first confusion swept over her face and then just uncertainty, but she still held the drink for a moment before she attempted another sip. “Not sure about this yet, but it doesn’t make me feel ill, so there is that.”

Revna grinned, “Well, right now, that is a positive, isn’t it.” It wasn’t a question but a statement.

Revna studied Mathis a moment. “Tell me where you are at right now.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

She sat there for a moment before reaching for the coffee and pouring a cup with a splash of milk and a small amount of sugar. Mathis wrapped her hands around it and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she had to push away the sadness from her eyes and took a sip of the coffee. “Sometimes I’m not sure. Lost, much of the time, but also determined. Dash and I had a plan and I intend to see it through,” she said firmly, summoning the determination that had kept her going these last few weeks here on Oed. It would be easier if we had some answers but the investigation is still ongoing, so there is no conclusion, no… clarity.” She shrugged. “But it doesn’t matter,” she said firmly. “All of that gets put to the side because the work demands it. Oed is in too precarious a position and I won’t any of this to taint the work we’ve been doing.”

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna nodded. “The work has to continue. You have a couple of options, push through or request an emergency replacement.” Revna paused for just a moment. “Of course, we both know you won’t take the second option.” Revna lifted her tea and took a sip. “That’s not what I’m asking though. There is only one answer from Ambassador Mathis. I’m asking where Jeanette is. You’ve suffered a huge loss, and you will have to grieve. And that is not an easy process. Have you considered talking to someone? A counselor?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Here, sitting in her office, Jeanette was not used to dropping her guard with anyone outside of a select few people. Revna was so kind to have helped out this last week, and Jeannette was loathe to ask too much of her given this wasn’t her assignment. But is was nice to talk to someone had had worked as an ambassador before, as there were just some aspects to the job that only those who had been in the role could understand.

The question made her frown though. “Considered? Not really. Not in an active dismissal way, just that it never really occurred to me in all the chaos of this last week.” She drew in a slow, deep breath. “We’re just so… heartbroken, Revna. Myself, Ren, Jessie. I don’t have any siblings and no aunts or uncles. My mother is still alive, but she’s getting on in years. My father past away over a decade ago now, so it’s been awhile since I’ve had to deal with such deeply personal loss.” She blew out a breath. “Maybe I should consider it, but to be honest, it’s a bit of a tricky ask around here. Yes, a therapists are bound by confidentiality but anyone I chose would have to have additional security clearance and a thorough background check. Not exactly something I can expect too quickly. I mean, it’s been a process enough just staffing the embassy so we can function. I’m not even sure which jurisdiction would be correct, though maybe Starfleet given they handle our security.” She shrugged in sheer weariness. She was way too hung over to mentally work through the logistics of getting her and her family a therapist.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

“I think you should. You have too much on your shoulders to allow this to fester in the background. It would be good for Ren and Jessie as well.” Revna studied her for a moment considering. It was a bit of crossing lines, but Revna wasn’t here permanently. She was here to help until Jeanette found someone else. “Well, and I may be over stepping here,” Revna said bluntly, “but before I worked for the diplomatic corp, I was, I am a counselor. My specialty is trauma not grief, but I am happy to step into the role for you, until you can find someone you are comfortable with.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

She let her lungs slowly fill with air, held it for a moment, and then it slowly out. After a moment, Jeanette nodded. “You’re not overstepping. I’m honoured and grateful,” she said softly. “I’ll mention it to Ren and we’ll let you know.” She wasn’t going to decide something like that on her own.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna nodded, “Of course. No pressure. Though, professionally, I suggest you look into a pediatric grief counselor for Jessie. I am happy to help any of you, until you can find someone to meet your needs.” Revna smiled kindly. She knew grief, she understood it, intimately.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Of course, thank you,” Jeanette said. “Jessie has been on my mind a lot throughout all of this. He’s taken it very hard as well, and it’s already been a difficult transition for him.”

She gazed out the window that overlooked the private garden at the side and back of the property and gathered her thoughts. Jean was always so used to being direct and speaking her mind. It was strange to feel uneasy voicing them now and feeling unable to turn and meet Revna’s gaze. Deep down she understood what it was, but she was loathe to let it happen down here, in her work space. The memorial had been difficult enough. “The hardest part is the uncertainty. Everything feels so precarious right now. I’ve been in more complicated and dire situations, but nothing that has struck so close to me. I was always able to compartmentalize, and as much as I already told you I would do just that… I’m worried I won’t be able to. I don’t know how to go into the next meeting with Ambassador Kek without Dash. Yes, I’m there with the Governor and Lieutenant Governor, but we’re not… close, or friends in the same way. It’s a different dynamic. Their duty is to Oed and I can’t expect them to have my back. It’s been a very long time since I’ve had to go it alone. I can, and I have before, but it’s so rare at this stage of my career.” It wasn’t just about having someone to help with th administrative side of things. This was about collaboration, about mutual understanding and support. Dash’s care and regard has been unwavering, something she could rely on. Suddenly, for the first time in many years, Jeannette Mathis wasn’t sure what she could professionally rely on. Personally, she had no doubts Ren would be there for her, but Ren never crossed lines into the work. It was the agreement they had had from Day One.

Jeannette Mathis, Federation Ambassador

Revna didn’t speak or do anything to interrupt. Jeannette needed to get this out, to voice it, before she could look at the task ahead of her and decide on a plan of action. Revna knew she could never replace what Jeannette had shared with Jones. They had been a team for a long time. It took a long time to build that kind of trust. It wasn’t something easily moved past. “We barely know each other, but we both know the job. It doesn’t help, really, I know,” her voice held a deep sorrow that told of understanding grief. “I am here until you say you don’t need me anymore. Tell me what you need and tell me what you want. Professionally or personally. We have to start somewhere.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie