Posted by Lieutenant Tandra Mika (Chief Mental Health Officer) in Recovery in All Forms

Posted by Civilian Yavia Crockett (Nurse - Sacred Heart Hospital) in Recovery in All Forms

Posted by Lieutenant Tandra Mika (Chief Mental Health Officer) in Recovery in All Forms
Posted by… suppressed (60) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
Mika hugged her back. “Okay. See you.” Then she smiled at Sharah and Revna. “Is it time? Yavia and Ilena have been keeping me busy all day.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Busy is good. You were never good at being idle,” Sharah smiled. “You never let us be idle either.”

Revna raised a brow in silent question.

She laughed. “Tandra was my CMO during my Cadet tour,” Sharah explained to Revna.

Mika nodded. “I was. Idle is boring.”

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO

“Ah, so you two have been together for a while then. That’s pretty special.”

“We were good friends. Kept in touch after Sharah graduated. I miss being a CMO, but being a counselor is rewarding too. I go wherever the Fleet needs me.”

She sat and looked at Mika. “Any questions or requests before we begin?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“No, I can’t think of any,” Mika replied, looking at Sharah and then out towards the nurse station to see if Yavia was still there.

~ Mika, CMHO

Yavia caught her looking and wiggled her fingers at her and blew her a very outrageous kiss before winking at her.

Sharah snorted a small laugh at it and then sat down and held her hand. “I’m glad the fleet needed you here.”

Mika laughed at Yavia’s antics and winked back. Then held Sharah’s and and smiled. “I missed working with you.”

“Tell me about that morning. How did your day start, Tandra?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mike’s smile quickly faded. “Ummm.” She uttered softly. “I uh… It was just a morning,” she shrugged. “I had a date, with Séan planned, so I put a little extra effort into getting ready.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“What did you do extra?” Revna asked.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“I used this special product on my hair that defines the curls, scrunched it against my head, and blow dried it. It makes it curlier.” Mika ran a hand through her hair. It was messy and unbrushed, knotted and dirty. “I don’t wear make up, I don’t like it, but I did put some facial lotion on and a scented body cream.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Does Sèan like the smell?” It seemed a personal question, but Revna was focusing on the before. When, in Tandra’s mind, things were normal.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Hmmm… I don’t know. I never asked. He seems to.” Mika replied. It was a little personal, but Mika didn’t mind answering. “We’re taking things slow. Dating, spending time together. We haven’t been intimate or anything.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“There is absolutely nothing wrong with going slow.” Revna always gave as much as her patient gave to her. “My husband I did the long distance thing for a year before we got married. It was very slow.”

“What were your plans for the day?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“It was a day off, so no work.” Mika replied. “I wanted to get my garden taken care of. I’m trying to start a new one.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Was Sèan going to help you?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“No, he’s only seen it once. We had a dinner date.” Mika replied. “That’s… That’s how he knew something was wrong. I never showed up for the date.”

~ Mika, CMHO

Revna nodded. Thank goodness for that. “What were you doing when it happened?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mika squeezed Sharah’s hand, hard. She bit her lip and looked back and forth between the two. Her stomach was queazy and she didn’t want to talk about it. “I was inside, just… reading. There was a knock at the door…” She swallowed and studied her own lap. “I um.... I…”

~ Mika, CMHO

Revna held up a hand and visibly took a breath and relaxed. “What were you reading?”

Sharah held her hand just as tightly.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“A medical study.” Mika made a face. “I can’t remember what about. They… They hit me in the head.” Mika was getting really worked up. Her heart rate and blood pressure climbing, fiddling with her free hand in her blanket. Her hand in Sharah’s was sweaty.

~ Mika, CMHO

“That’s okay,” Revna assured her. “Tell me about your garden.” Revna was watching the read outs. Getting worked up was inevitable, but she didn’t want Tandra over stressed. They needed to develop rapport and trust before they could move to the really hard things.

Enger, DOE

“I like to grow herbs and fruit and things. Things that grow something useful.” Mika said. “I have some flowers too, but I really like ‘getting something’ at the end of it.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“How are you finding that here on Oed? It takes more time to nuture it, I imagine. With the lack of weather.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“It’s easier than growing things on a space ship.” Mika said with a little smile.

~ Mika, CMHO

“Well, there is that,” Revna agreed with a soft laugh. “What did you do with your plants?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Little planters with artificial sunlight lamps,” Mika said with a shrug. “With a little watering system. They usually do just fine, as long as they’re small.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“You said fruit and herbs. What kinds? Anything really interesting? I enjoy cooking with new rhings.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Chives, parsley, Sharah gave me seeds for Betazoid Anslari once. That was fun to grow.” Mika listed some other things off.

~ Mika, CMHO

“That one has a mind of its own,” Sharah chuckled.

“If you could get me another one of those?” Mika asked. “I mean, I guess it’s not really easier for you to than me. Isn’t your brother in the delta quadrant now?”

“I can get you some,” Sharah assured her. Fresh, she would ask her Byzrie to bring some. “He is. I haven’t heard from him in awhile. I need to try and contact him.”

“The Delta quadrant?” Revna asked. “The Manhattan?”

“Yes, he was just recently transferred there.”

“Oh man, I could tell him stories about that crew. I was stationed on the Manhattan as their Diplomatic Attaché before I came to Oed.”

Sharah shook her head, “Small galaxy.”

Mika smiled. “You should tell us all about it. Sharah and Eilah are close.”

Revna gently brought the conversation back, “What did you do with your garden that morning?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mika focused on Revna, a sense of dread settling over her. “Um… I watered them. They’re not big enough to be clipped back yet or harvested. I was… a little depressed when I got here, to Oed, so I didn’t start gardening right away. So I just water them, make sure they’re getting enough light, let them grow. I grow mint, because I like the smell. Oh, maybe I should plant some lavender. That would make my room smell nice.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“I love lavender. I could never get it to grow quite right. At least not to harvest it. You know I could bring you some bilberry plants. They do well in a big enough pot, and they are very delicious.”

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO

Mika grinned. “There’s a trick to it. I’d love bilberry plants. They sound perfect for my little garden.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“I’m going to try again, now that we are settled. Like you said, it’s hard on a ship.” She waved a finger at her, “You’ve got it. I’ll bring a small bush by. I don’t think we have any seedlings right now. I’ll check though.”

“A small bush is fine,” Mika said.

“So where did you meet Sèan?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Oh, well…” Mika blushed. “I’m the ‘Chief Mental Health Officer’ here. I’m in charge of the hospital’s counselors. He was assigned here. He… works for me. Normally, I only go for girls but…” And she explained her and Sèan’s first meeting and how she ended up liking him. “That’s why we’re taking it so slow. He’s the first man I’ve dated.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Well when you make a connection, nothing else matters. How do you feel about the difference from your normal?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Well, I talked it through with Sharah.” She squeezed Sharah’s hand. “It doesn’t really matter in the end, does it? Whatever makes you happy. He does.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“That’s very true. Happiness can come from unexpected places.” Revna was glad Tandra had such a close friend. “You said you weren’t happy when you came to Oed. Why?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“I liked serving on ships.” Mika replied with a shrug. “But I’ve been moved around so many times, I lost my sense of belonging.”

~ Mika, CMHO

Being in Star Fleet meant moving, but that sounded like more than normal. “What about now? How do you feel about being here?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“It’s okay. At least I can work with Sharah. And Yavia, and the others.” Mika shrugged again.

~ Mika, CMHO

Revna noted the shrug. She didn’t think Tandra was aware of it. She wasn’t happy here, but she wasn’t sure yet if that was because of the attack or before. “If you could serve anywhere, where would you go?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Challenger, to work with Cadets. Or a medical ship.” Mika said excitedly. “I mean, I’m happy here,” Her body language said that wasn’t quite true, but she wasn’t aware of it. “Oed is an underserved population. I just miss the exploration.”

~ Mika, CMHO

Mika was lying, but she wasn’t aware of that. “Exploration is a reward all it’s own, isn’t it? You enjoy teaching?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Yes,” she again gestured to Sharah. “It’s not something I would’ve chosen but something I was chosen for.” She said. “But I liked it so much I was sad when I was called away.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“We always need good teachers. Those connections between teacher and student are special.”

Sharah squeezed Mika’s hand and smiled, “Yes they are.”

“What did you have for breakfast that morning?” Revna asked.

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“Uhm..... Oatmeal and some fruit.” Mika answered. She smiled at Sharah. Her friend’s presence was clearly a comfort.

~ Mika, CMHO

“Then what did you do?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

“I got ready, like we talked about earlier. Are we going to walk through the entire day?” Mika asked.

~ Mika, CMHO

Revna sat back just a little, but she was still relaxed and welcoming. “Yes. Not all today, but eventually, yes we will walk through your whole day.” She leaned forward slightly and set a hand on the back of Tandra’s. “I keep hearing you say you want to be back to ‘normal.’ Before this person showed up at your door, your day was normal. You said that. So we’re going to explore that. That way, as we progress, we have something by which to measure your return to normal.”

“So we’re going to talk about that morning. What you did, how you felt, what made it normal.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mika nodded. She knew frustration with the process was normal. She’d seen it enough times herself. “Just…” She shrugged. “Nothing special about it. Another day on beautiful Oed.” There was sarcasm in her voice. “Nothing different from any other morning.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Tandra, you’re not happy here, it’s clear the way you talk about Oed. That’s okay, you don’t have to like it here. But I am saying something because I don’t want you to fall into a belief that being transferred to Oed will make everything better. I know you know that, but it can be hard to apply what we know, to how we feel.”

“What is your goal, Tandra? Other than a return to ‘normal’ what does moving on, conquering if you will, this trauma look for you?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

There was a stab of guilt, Mika felt bad for not liking it here. Sharah loved it here. Mika looked at Revna and shrugged. “I don’t know yet. I… I don’t want to leave Oed.”

~ Mika, CMHO

Sharah set a hand on her shoulder and then leaned in and hugged her. Sharah had her headband on so she couldn’t feel Mika’s guilt, but she knew the look. It was okay that Mika didn’t like this posting. Sharah hadn’t thought she ever would like it either, but so much had changed for her here. It had made the negatives worth it for her. It was okay if it wasn’t the same for Tandra.

“I’m not suggesting that you should, nor would I recommend it. I just want to make sure that we avoid that particular obstacle, alright?”

Mika nodded. “I understand.”

“Now,” Revna said, a little more firm, “I want to work toward you being able to talk about that morning without it spiking your blood pressure and heart rate. Not the attack or what came after, but before. That you can remember it, with that same sense of ease that normalcy gives you. That may be a long road, but we will start there. I also have some homework for you. I want you to keep a list of what triggers you. Even if it seems a small thing. Or maybe you don’t know what specifically tiggers, so write down what was going on, how you were feeling. You don’t need to figure out why it’s a trigger, just that it is. Does that sound doable?”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mika nodded again. “I’ll keep a journal. That’s what I’d recommend my patients do.” She sighed, “I know what this can turn into. I don’t want it to go there.”

~ Mika, CMHO

Revna nodded, the beads in her hair catching the light. She knew Tandra knew it, but she had found over the years, that it was important to say anyway. Staying silent could make Tandra feel that people didn’t care enough to help with the small things. “Good. It’s been a long first session. So I will see you again tomorrow, alright. Comm me if you need anything.”

Revna, Lady McKenzie

Mika nodded. “I will. Promise.” She looked at Sharah and smiled. “There’s a number of people who’ll make sure I do.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“That’s right, we will,” she winked at her friend and mentor. After Revna left, Sharah looked at her, “Feel like eating or would you like to get up and walk again?”

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO

“I want to walk… Then eat.” Mika said, pulling the blankets off herself. She moved her legs off the side of the bed.

~ Mika, CMHO

“Then let’s do that.” Sharah grabbed the slippers and robe. She helped Tandra get ready. Yavia appeared at the door, “Don’t think you get to go out without me.” She came over and put an arm around Mika and gave her a gentle hug. “Let’s escape!”

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO

Mika hugged her back. “I wouldn’t dream of it.” She said. Ready to go, she stood carefully, leaning on Yavia and Sharah at first, and then supporting herself.

~ Mika, CMHO

“Good. Let’s go,” Yavia said with a soft laugh in her voice. They let Mika decide the pace and direction and the length. Tomorrow they could push her for more.

Yavia

Just like earlier, she came the doorway and hesitated just outside of it. “I uhm… I don’t know. Maybe that’s enough.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Okay, that’s fine.” Sharah nodded at the other door in the room, “Do you want to use the facilities before you get back in bed?”

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO

Mika shook her head quickly. “No, it’s okay. I want to stay here.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Alright, let’s get back in bed then. Sharah get her something to eat. Yourself too. I know you haven’t eaten today.” Yavia gave Sharah a look and Sharah flushed. She hurried over to the replicator.

Yavia shook her head, “Amazing doctor, but is going to end up a patient if she doesn’t take care if herself.”

Yavia

“I always warned her the same thing,” Mika said as Yavia helped her back towards bed. “Sharah, just a little something please, I’m not hungry.”

~ Mika, CMHO

“Hey,” Sharah pouted at Yavia and Tandra, “I do much better these days. Today was just busy.” She nodded and ordered a tray of veggies, fruit, cheese, and crackers for them all to share and brought it over.

Lt. Cmdr. Fayth, SFCMO