Posted by Civilian Jezem (Upstanding Citizen) in Someone To Take Your Pain (Tag Sharah)

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Sharah Fayth (Chief Star Fleet Medical Officer) in Someone To Take Your Pain (Tag Sharah)

Posted by Civilian Jezem (Upstanding Citizen) in Someone To Take Your Pain (Tag Sharah)
Outside of Counselor Ivan’s office, Jezem paused to run his hands over his tired face. Wrung-out, over-stretched and worn down. The calm of the storm that will return next week to whip through his life once again. Jezem pulled himself together enough to get out of the doorway and pad his way past countless other sterile doors in too bright and clean halls. The Starfleet complex was one of the ugliest buildings Jezem ever had the pleasure of seeing. He made it out of the counseling offices and into an open common area washed in natural light from various skylights and tall windows.

Jezem threw himself face first onto the first padded bench in his path. Too many thoughts and feelings still trapped in his head. Old trauma lingering like bruise on the skin. Pain, some long forgotten refreshed with recollection. The fear that he could never heal, never find this mysterious path forward towards healing that Counselor Ivan insists is there. Another fear, all this effort and nothing to show for it. No progress, no change. Same old him. No answer to Naanni’s question. No happiness and peace for him. Sisters, Eryn was right. People like them don’t find peace. They find contentment and hold onto it for as long as it lasts. Jezem sighed into the fake leather of the seat. It smelled like cleaner. Gross. He rolled over so he lay on his back, staring up at the sky above. Ah, then there was that overwhelming feeling of sadness and hopelessness.

What was that called again? Oh right, depression. Sisters, can he go back? To when he didn’t care about things like true happiness and finding himself.

Jezem

Sharah came out of an office further down the hall. She had been called for a medical consult for a prescription for a mutual patient. She had been at the hospital all day, and had stopped by the complex on her way home. Her small frame allowed her to move softly down the hall. The Fleet complex never slept. Three full shifts were always going and no department was ever dead. She passed through the doors and her eyes were immediately drawn to the person laying on one of the small sofas. They were deeply upset. It hit her like waves. There were often such feelings in the counseling department, but this person was here, alone, not in a session, and not Star Fleet. Her talents made it so that even if she wanted, she could not walk away. Sharah wasn’t that kind of person anyway. She genuinely cared about people. She paused and sat in the adjacent chair. “Can I do anything to help?” Because it was obvious the person was not alright.

Fayth, SFCMO

Jezem sat upright, panic on his face. Stupid! Here he was so caught up in feeling like a. . . like a miserable puddle of mud that he let someone sneak up on him. The old him never cared about these things. He’d never let anyone sneak up on him, nor feel. . . embarrassment at getting caught. Jezem’s thoughts scattered as he attempted to gather the shards of his personas and cobble them together into something he can present. Spoiled by wealth. A harmless ditz. Far too emotional. It’ll have to do. Jezem took a deep breath before turning himself around the face the person sitting across from them.

Oh. A betazoid. Jezem could scream in frustration. Breathe idiot. In a moment Jezem focused his mind to quiet the thoughts and feelings whirlling endlessly inside him. Except he couldn’t quite cover everything. Frustration warred with ennui. Why even bother? What was the point? Depression still there, no matter what kind of face he wore. Jezem buried his face in his hands, “Can you point me to the nearest Vulcan to train me how to purge every emotion from my body?” He said into his palms.

Jezem

Sharah couldn’t stand Vulcans, but she most certainly understood the appeal. She’d studied with them trying to learn their discipline. “That’s a misunderstanding. Vulcan’s don’t purge their emotions, they still have them. They just suppress them until they explode. Then they go through the ritual of cleansing their emotions again and again.” The woman smiled gently. “However, there is much to be said for their mental discipline. I know a few that may be willing to take on a student if you’re serious. However the training begins with fully embracing your emotions so that you can recognize and identify them. Then learn how to negate them.”

Fayth, SFCMO