Posted by Civilian Thyr Th’arialat (Resident) in Un-Conscientious Objector

Posted by Civilian Jezem (Upstanding Citizen) in Un-Conscientious Objector

Posted by Civilian Thyr Th’arialat (Resident) in Un-Conscientious Objector
Posted by… suppressed (22) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Shivan paced back and forth in his own apartment. By Eryn’s rules, he was supposed to report this. But… It would be so easy to just do. Or not report. Either way. He’d received a request that was.... less than squeaky clean. It was exactly the sort of thing he used to do. He hadn’t been able to turn it down on the spot. He’d told them he’d ‘see’. To come back in a few days.

Maybe he should put it out of his mind. He would go think of something else. Do something else. He decided to go to Jezem’s (because what else would he go do?). He showed up at Jezem’s door and knocked.

~ Thyr

A few minutes later the door opened and Jezem poked his head through, “Ew, you’re all shaky and sweaty,” At least, Shivan had the look of sweaty given how nervous he seemed, “Come in and spill because something is clearly bothering you.” Jezem stepped aside, allowing the Andorian the space to come in. The house was much the same though there were an unusually amount of flowers. There was always fresh flowers somewhere but now they were every where. Displayed on ever open surface Jezem could find room for them. He was running out of vases.

“You want some flowers for your shop?” He asked Shivan.

Jezem

Shivan remembered what Séan said about his girlfriend, that doctor. “Happen to meet Séan’s girlfriend?” He asked, seeing all the flowers. He nodded to the question, “Sure, people like that crap. You pick though.” He shrugged to answer the previous question, looking down at himself “Nothing too important. I was working.” That would explain the sweat that wasn’t because of nervousness. Not the sweat that was. Or the shakes.

~ Thyr

“He has a girlfriend?” Jezem wondered out loud, because of course that would be the first thing he would comment on. Shaking off that train of thought and motioning for Shivan to take a seat on the couch, “Okay. And did something happen while you were working?” Did something happen to spook Shivan? Jezem showed none of his concern in his body language or face. It was too soon for the Syndicate to have caught Shivan’s trail.

Jezem

“He visited after you poisoned me because I missed our meeting. He made me agree to let her scan me because she was a doctor before she was a counselor,” Shivan said, clearly delighting in gossiping about their shared shrink. “They’re not dating yet but he said he’s into her, and she was flirting hard with him while she was there. Her name’s Tandra Mika.”

Jezem’s eyes narrowed at that name. Tandra Mika. The counselor’s boss. He made a mental note to look into Miss Mika and see what kind of person she was. Something about her. . . There was danger there.

Shivan recognized the look. “You know something about her I don’t?”

“I had my own run in with her, don’t worry about it.” Jezem

He took the offered seat. “It has nothing to do with our shared past.” Shivan shrugged. “It’s.... I had a request to acquire and sell a weapon.” He told Jezem what it was. An illegal Klingon blade. It was exactly the sort of thing Shivan had previously been in the business of supplying. “I didn’t say yes, of course, but… I can’t bring myself to tell Eryn, either.” No, he was still considering calling the guy back. He was offering big bucks for the job.

~ Thyr

Jezem stared blankly at Shivan, momentarily struck speechless. “Thyr,” Jezem began through gritted teeth, “You have your shop because you promised you would report suspicious activity to her. If you take this job and you don’t tell her then you will lose your business and you’ll be arrested, you imbecile!” This is why Jezem never believed Shivan when he said he wasn’t that dumb. Because this? This was total idiot behavior.

Jezem

“I know, I know!” Shivan growled back. He sighed, “old habits die hard, I guess. I swear, I wasn’t gonna take it! I thought about it, sure, but more as a missing the old days thing than a throwing my life away thing.”

~ Thyr

“Now isn’t the time for short-sighted thinking,” Jezem said sternly, “What you have now is hells of a lot more stable than what you were doing and our work on the old ship.” Criminal life was grand, except when the jobs were slow, or terrible, or people tried to stiff you on the pay or kill you so they didn’t have to pay or it just plain sucked because you had to share tight quarters with other criminals who were not shy about setting boundaries.

“I know, but why do you think I turned to what we did before in the first place?” Shivan replied.

Jezem pinched the bridge of his nose, “Report to Eryn what you saw and see what she wants you to do about it. Sisters, this is what had you so nervous and sweaty?”

Jezem

“I wasn’t nervous,” he argued. “Conflicted, maybe.” He still didn’t want to report to Eryn, but he valued loyalty, that was partly why he was able to join the Syndicate. Jezem held his loyalties. A direct order from Jezem wasn’t to be ignored.

Now isn’t the time for short-sighted thinking… Like this would last that long anyway. The Syndicate would find him regardless of what he did, all he was doing was delaying them. Like he’d told Séan, living a life he hated to delay a death he couldn’t avoid, and causing more and more collateral damage the longer he stayed. Shivan forced his clenched fist to relax, trying to use one of the method’s Séan was trying to teach him.

~ Thyr

“Conflicted? About reporting to Eryn?” Jezem would normally yell at Shivan for being dumb and to stop thinking such things but since he’s trying to do better he supposed he should show more tact. Tact and, ugh, consideration. “What about it makes you conflicted?”

Jezem

Shivan expected him to yell. To call Shivan dumb. Those was.... Weird. Couldn’t they just fight it out like they always did? That would be normal for them. And cathartic. Shivan, usually impulsive and unable to shut his stupid mouth, was unusually quiet as if avoiding saying something. He hated talking feelings. After several moments of silence, “Nothing. It was stupid. Forget it.”

~ Thyr

Jezem wanted to strangle Shivan. Don’t be so dense! Instead, the orion breathed deeplyt through his nose before speaking, “If it was nothing you wouldn’t have brought it up. You wear your emotions and something about this is bothering you so tell me what it is already.” Was it the selling people out to Eryn? Reporting suspicious activity was far and beyond more legal than anything they did in the past. Besides, anyone who goes to random civilian blacksmith for illegal weapons hardly deserved the title of criminal by Jezem’s standards.

“I’m not going to ‘forget it’” He added with a pointed look.

Jezem

You asked! Shivan almost shouted, fists balling once again. No, no, count breaths… One… Two… A few deep breaths passed, “It’s like being a rat on the kinds of people I used to work with.” Yeah, this guy was an idiot, though if Eryn weren’t holding the shop over his head Shivan supposed the guy would’ve picked the right place. “Can you imagine ratting on any of them? The people you used to work with? It would be like if you’d turned me in instead of helping me.” Jezem was, after all, technically harbouring a fugitive. Shivan wasn’t the biggest name in the criminal world of weapon trading but a big enough name it may very well be recognized by the kinds of people in that world, or the groups of law enforcement who hunted for those kinds of people.

~ Thyr

All through Shivan’s explanation Jezem became more and more confused. “These low-lifes aren’t the Syndicate. No, I can’t imagine-” Jezem cut himself off because he was about to say I would never betray the Syndicate like that. Instead he finished, “-why this is such a big deal to you. They’re not the Syndicate. They’re criminal low-lives who populate space like starving rats and breed just as fast. I’d gladly sell them out, especially if I were being paid for it.”

“They’re not Syndicate, no. If they were, it wouldn’t be a debate.” Jezem would know just how strong Shivan’s loyalties could be. He’d proven that more than once on Pavlajia. Shivan started to laugh though, shaking his head. “It shouldn’t matter anyway. I’m not only here because of unpaid dues. I betrayed the Syndicate directly. Crossed them.” He’d felt there was no choice. It was betray the Syndicate or die on the spot. In retrospect, there had been a choice after all. He really was an idiot.

“Think of it this way. By selling them out to Eryn you’re influencing the criminal activities on this rock. It’s only beneficial to you if this place builds a reputation of being aggressive on crime. The less small-time criminals or even the bigger names come here the safer you are. You need to think about the bigger picture.”

Jezem

“You’re right, of course you are. I can’t be recognized by anyone who might know me or know of me.” He shook his head, blurting what was actually on his mind at last, “Why am I trying this hard anyway? You and I both know however they end up doing it, they’re going to find me. All I’m doing is avoiding it like a damn coward and bringing you down with me!” At the word coward he banged his fist into his own leg.

~ Thyr

And there comes the truth. For a moment, Jezem was quiet in deep contemplation. “It’s not cowardly,” He said at length, “You’re trying because there’s a chance you’ll survive this. Slim though it may be the Syndicate isn’t all powerful or all knowing. They’re powerful but not invincible. Even if they were that powerful, were I in your position I would be doing everything in my power to out run them and live in spite of them. I would be fighting for every minute of survival, every day of peace.”

Jezem seemed in a somber mood, lost in his thoughts as he reguarded the rings on his fingers. Something to fight against. Was that what he’s been missing? The thrill? The challenge? Would Naanni be proud of him or would she reject him? “So even if Argam and I are forced to go on the run don’t drown yourself in pity. Because I won’t be feeling sorry for myself or cursing your name. I will dancing on the blade’s edge and it will not be my blood that wets the steel.”

Jezem

“Argam… He’s okay with that?” Anyone else and Shivan wouldn’t care so much. Jezem… For some reason he did care. So much it tore him up with guilt. Jezem’s words did make him feel better, but it wasn’t just Jezem. “You two and that shrink and his girl… If I get caught they’ll be after you.” Shivan seemed legitimately upset. “I… I considered using what money I have to get far away from here, give myself up. So they wouldn’t know you’ve been in contact with me.”

~ Thyr

Jezem twisted around, pressing close and into Shivan’s space, “You better be joking with me,” He hissed. Cold fury replacing whatever somber mood he held before. Of all the most idiotic things he ever heard! “I swear to the Sisters if you pull any bullshit like that I will hunt you down and drag you back to this colony and then I will break your legs so you could never do it again. We did not work so hard to get you to where you are now just so you could throw it all away!”

Jezem

The anger did not scare Shivan, but it did surprise him. He wasn’t sure what he expected but… It wasn’t that. His smart mouth acted up before he could filter it: “Well if I did that, I don’t think the Syndicate will leave anything for you to hunt down. They might break my legs for you though.” He said grinning stupidly.

Then he sobered up, not at all intimidated by Jezem or the fact he had invaded Shivan’s personal space to deliver his angry rant. “I just thought… I’m not worth at least four lives, Jezem. I honestly didn’t think you’d care. One less thing to worry about. I’d have done it myself, but you know how the Syndicate feels about that.”

~ Thyr

Jezem’s lips were pulled back in a snarl. Maybe Shivan’s stupidity was starting to rub off on him because like a tackles andorian he’s blurting his own feelings, “I do care. I care too much and it makes no sense. I should have turned you in. I should let you leave this rock. But I won’t and I don’t think I can. Your stupid drama and your stupid low self-esteem is the best thing that’s happened to me since I came to the colony because I had no idea what I was living for and dealing with you and all your problems makes me feel a little better about myself.”

By the end of his rant he was panting, all the emotions he tried to bury and forget burst forth from his chest and now he said it.

Jezem

Shivan was speechlessly surprised. “Well I’m glad I’m good for something.” He said at last. He huffed and sank into the couch. “The shrink said he thought you wouldn’t let me go because I’m an investment to you.”

~ Thyr

“That too. I have an account in my head of everything I’ve done for you and all the meals I’ve made and it’s collecting interest.” Jezem snapped. Sisters he wanted to punch this man and fight like they usually do but he was too emotionally exhausted. Tired of feeling things and explaining himself over and over again. Jezem turned back away and let himself fall over sideways onto the cushions. This is worse than fighting their feelings out. “What else has that shrink been telling you about me?”

Jezem

Shivan would far prefer fighting their feelings out. The physical pain detracted from the emotional pain and physical pain was easy to deal with. Especially Jezem’s punches. It would be cathartic and relaxing, in a weird way. “Just that you said I should stop going to the rough bars.” He said with a shrug. He was emotionally exhausted and his head was spinning and he just didn’t know what to think anymore.

~ Thyr

“We’re never doing this again,” Jezem said, “We are never going to talk without throwing a punch because this? This is terrible and I hate it.” He only felt more confused and tired and full of emotions he didn’t want to think about or examine at this time. “I’m going to put on a soap because I just want to sit in silence and not think for an hour. Also, I bought way too much of this thing called caramel kettle corn and I’ll be sick if I eat any more of it so please take it off my hands.”

Jezem

Shivan nodded. “Agreed. I hate it. I feel worse. And confused. Never again.” He settled into the couch more comfortably. “I’ll take it,” said the living garbage disposal known as Shivan. “Good snack food for the show. What’re we watching today?”

~ Thyr

“They’re in the pantry. Please eat the whole thing and bring me the tapenade in the fridge and the crackers,” Jezem said while selecting their entertainment for the night. Once their snacks were gathered Jezem explained the show he picked, “It’s an episodic short series made by humans, only six episodes but I knew we had to watch it when I read the description. The story is about, get this, a Syndicate cell risking it all in a high-stakes heist to secure a rare gemstone of all things and they’re in a race against the clock against Starfleet agents.” The series was bound to hilarious if only because the humans know jack all about the Syndicate.

Jezem