Posted by Lieutenant Hannah Lori Asimina (Asst. Chief Medical Officer) in Date Night In The Place With A View

Posted by Civilian Jason Reilly (Assistant Director - Colonial Intelligence) in Date Night In The Place With A View

Posted by Lieutenant Hannah Lori Asimina (Asst. Chief Medical Officer) in Date Night In The Place With A View
Posted by… suppressed (43) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Jason had told Hannah he was going to his office, which wasn’t a lie. He did, and ran all the names and places she had told him over their hours together. She was legitimate, and the relief he felt was surprising.

He left and went to his new apartment, the multi-level penthouse of rhe brand new Sky Harbor Tower. He met with the new building manager, security head, and maintenance lead. He then went to his new home, scoured the place for illicit surveillance, set up countermeasures, and then waited for the caterer to show up.

An hour before Hannah was due, the caterer arrived. Nachos, Deltan gumbo, pizza, chili, Monty Cristo sandwiches, and loaded baked potatoes were all set up and kept at the ideal temp with twenty minutes to spare before she was due to arrive. Jason shooed them out and told them they could pick up tomorrow downstairs. He then raced to the bathroom, showered, brushed his hair and put on a pale green button down shirt and a pair of gray slacks. He looked at himself in the mirror, and the sudden realization of him being nervous was not lost on him.

Reilly

Hannah’s trip to the Centurion didn’t take more than a couple of hours. An adjustment to the settings on the burn unit took care of everything. She spent the rest of her afternoon and evening in her quarters. She spent about an hour staring at her screen unable to find the motivation to make a visual recording. There was no point and it only made things harder unnecessarily. The rest of the time she wondered and stressed over everything. And whether or not she was making a good decision in the ling run and not just for right now. She had been completely honest and open with Jason. Even about things she should not have. She prayed he had been as well.

She realized most people were not interested in a woman with a baby. It was why she said something now because…Hannah wouldn’t lie. At 7 she got up, showered and changed. Black tampered but relaxed leggins that buttoned up from the cuff were paired with a grey and black floral lace and satin camisole. Over it she pulled on a light weight rose colored sweater that wrapped around and had large button on her right side. She gazed in the mirror, “No regrets Hannah. Even if he changed his mind.” She clipped her badge to her shirt, stepped into her flats and left the complex. She wasn’t accustomed to needing a ground car, and so she arrived at the building and entered the lobby 2 minutes after 8. The walk took longer than she expected.

Asimina

When the chime rang, Jason almost had a panic attack. What are you doing? Why are you doing this? And she is going to have a BABY! WHAT ARE YOU THINKING?!?!…

And he opened the door.

She was gorgeous. And he suddenly felt like everything was ok. He smiled at her and signed I wasn’t sure you’d come, and I am glad you did. You look beautiful, Hannah. and he gestured her inside.

Her smile probably looked how he felt - nervous and relieved. Jason just looked confident and relaxed. I wasn’t sure you would answer the door. She stood there a moment just looking at him. The shirt made his eyes look so much…well more. Her fingers splayed wide and she shook her back and forth at the wrist near her neck - sign for ‘he’s hot’. She blushed and quickly put her hand down.

The place had been transformed. It actually looked like someone lived there. The seemingly mismatched and ‘ecclectic’ things he had selected that afternoon fit… and fit well. And the place smelled great with all the food. Drink? he asked. I have fresh juices and soda. Whatever you want.

Reilly

The food smelled great…except for…something. The cleaner used on the new furniture. Apple or anything with ginger.

Both? I can make you a ginger ale with some apple juice. he asked. His mind was still screaming at him, but he chose to simply ignore it.

Hannah barely contained the look of yuck the idea of the two drinks together caused. B didn’t like the idea. That’s okay, just juice for now.

She looked around as she went further into the space. It suited him. She had seen it while he was shopping, but it all came together nicely. Did everything arrive? But what was she doing here? Well that was easy, because she wanted to be because she liked him. And that was…huge.

Asimina

It did. and he walked over and handed her the drink and faced her. “My hands hurt from signing.” and he laughed. He the said “But I found a feature of this place we weren’t shown when we looked. Ready?”

She smiled, he had ordered a lot to be delivered. She took the glass and sipped. “That is what your 25/7 concierge is for. To sign for you.” And she grinned. Hannah would go nuts doing that though. Having someone else handling all of her business. “Oh?” She was curious but unsurprised. That woman hadn’t intended to show Jason anything. “Ready.”

He went to the wall by the massive windows and pressed a series of buttons. The bottom seven feet of the windows slowly lowered, opening the apartment to the night air, quite unintentionally getting rid of the cleaner smell… at least for a bit. He dimmed the lights and said “Follow me, I want to show you something.”

Hannah turned watching all the windows go down. That was cool, she grinned. As the breeze came in it reminded her of some of her climbs after reaching the top.

He led her out onto the wide balcony. From the living room. From this side, they could see the main park of the city in front of them. He took her hand, interlacing his fingers with hers, and slowly led her to where the balcony wrapped around the corner of the building. From that side, the lights of Oed at night shown and sparkled, but it was quiet. No sound of traffic or shuttles… just lights and peace.

Reilly

She glanced down at their hands once. Her thumb rubbed over his hand as his fingers laced with hers. As they stepped around the corner her mouth made an ‘O’ shape. She was still for a moment, then, Beautiful. Hannah moved to the edge of the balcony. The nearness of the edge didn’t bother her, there was a barrier after all, but Jason would get the impression even without the barrier, Hannah wouldn’t be bothered. “It’s like looking down at the stars. It’s beautiful.” She breathed in, “And peaceful.”

Asimina

He wasn’t looking at the view. He was looking at her silhouetted against the view. And Jason Reilly- the man who had mastered the art of using people and manipulating events to get what was wanted or, in the case of many a beautiful woman- lost his ability to breathe. His chest was tight, constricted, his pupils dilating. For a moment he thought maybe she had poisoned him. But no… he was simply having feelings for her. String ones that made no sense to him right then, but would as he thought on them later. But right there, right then… he was scared.

He cleared his throat and, when he could breathe, he said “You look so beautiful right there. It suits you.”

Reilly

Hannah turned and looked at him. He kept saying that. Hannah knew she was pretty. That wasn’t vanity, but she had never been self conscious about her looks. She was who she was. It wasn’t until her last two years on the Fearless that being self conscious had started. It was never about her looks though. She had learned very quickly, however, after leaving home that men made such compliments and weren’t sincere. So she tended to take them with a grain of salt. It was his body language that said more and brought color tonher cheeks that the breeze didn’t cool. She didn’t know what to make of her reaction or why she was there.

“I like high places. The wind is always moving.” She turned her face into, pulling her hair back. “When I was little I didn’t know the wind made a sound. It was always there, still pr moving but silent. Like me.” She grinned. “My dad said I was an…” she always has trouble with that word a-d-r-e-n-a-l-i-n-e “seeker. I didn’t want to miss out on anything.”

“But the question is…do you like it? It’s your home.”

Asimina

Jason wasn’t thinking when he spoke, it was just the words that were the plain and unhindered truth. “I like it more now that you are in it.” His eyes widened at the implications of what he said, but he cleared his throat and refused to backpeddle or try and cover, despite what his brain was telling him to do. “Sorry if that was too much. My brain is telling me to shut up, and it is usually pretty on point.” and he chuckled in a self-deprecating fashion and looked at the floor as heat colored his cheeks slightly.

Reilly

He was blushing. So he wasn’t quite as self assured as he looked. That actually made Hannah feel better. “No,” Then Hannah looked away and then gave a nervous smile, “Well…maybe a bit. More surprising and unexpected than too much.” So many questions, so many things to consider, so much that should be said or not, so much was changing and who she was today would not be her in a matter of weeks and short months. It was enough to make her dizzy and grip the railing. Why was she doing this? It certainly wasn’t fair to Jason, but was that even her decision?

Asimina

The sound of her hand landing on the railing moved his eyes up and he saw her grip the top of the barrier. He moved to her side and put his hand gently on the small of her back. Are you ok? Should we go inside and sit? he signed.

Reilly

Oh that was such a loaded question. Did he realize that? It would be easier to strap into a bungee cord and leap off the balcony than leap into whatever this was.

Her hands stayed gripped on the railing. “Yeah I think. Sorry, I just got a bit dizzy, but not from the height.” She looked out over the view as she pressed back slightly against his hand. “We can or we can stay.”

Asimina

Jason took a breath, kept his hand pressed against her, and stepped to be next to her. “Tell me what you want, and I will make sure you have it. Whatever way you want or need.” He knew this was a loaded request. But it wasn’t him intending it to be. He was just trying to suss out what she felt was happening. Oh, he wasn’t stupid. Neither was she. The attraction was effortless and plain to see. But the question, much the first time she asked, now hung between them. Friends… or more?

Reilly

Hannah’s heart thudded and raced, just like before repelling down a cliff. She tipped her head back and looked up at the stars. How many times did she look out and wonder where he was and why he wasn’t there? When was the last time she wondered? If she was honest, before Ops came and packed his things up. Why? Why didn’t she feel that ache anymore? She never did, not this time. Why not? What was she feeling? “Gods, I feel like Alexis.” She made a strange sound, maybe a cry of frustration or a bitter laugh, it was hard to tell.

She turned her head to look at him and then down at the balcony at her feet. “I don’t know, Jason. Wants and needs are very different. And it’s not just my needs anymore.” She let go of the railing and began to sign. She tried to go slow but she just couldn’t use her voice anymore. I can’t even contemplate wants, even if I know what they are or what I wish they would be. Because before I can do that I have to consider…my baby and its needs. I’m in limbo AGAIN and I hate Daniel for it. I hate him. I hate him for leaving me with this, but if I’m honest he… Hannah stopped. Several cruel realizations coming to her at once. I don’t miss him because he was never really there.

Hannah paced away and back, shaking her hands to rid the tingling sensation left in the wake of her anger. I need my life to move forward. I want to see where this she waved between them, might go. But I can’t even imagine why you would want to do that. I’m not and never have been the type to have a fling. I would never be able to look myself in a mirror if I did. Especially now.

I am not going to physically stay this way - my pregnancy some abstract idea. People will see us…if…if there is more, and assume it’s yours. and what man wanted another’s baby with a woman he discarded without a thought?

Asimina

Jason watched her pace, could feel the anger in her rigid and rapid gestures. At her last statement, he waved it off. I don’t care what other people think. At all. He looked away from her and leaned against the railing, looking out over the city. He was quiet for a long time.

I have never thought about children. Never thought about a long term anything, really. I moved too much, was too.. and struggled with a sign and then just said ” -flippant with life. Mine. Other people’s.” He looked out again. I don’t understand this. and returned the motion between them. I don’t know why it happened… is happening. It scares me. And I have never been scared before. Not ever. But you scare me. He turned as faced her fully.

Not because you are pregnant. Not because I am staring down the barrel of being with a woman who is going to have a child that I have no connection to or right to claim. I am scared because you, Hannah, scare me. I have known you eight hours, and I bought a home and stopped for furniture with you. I opened the door tonight and all I felt was relief it wasn’t my imagination. And I am scared because I am selfish. In all my relationships. I have been selfish with my dedication. And I know that I can’t do that with you. He walked over and stood in front of her and looked her in the eyes and said “And it scares me that that doesn’t scare me.”

Reilly

He was silent for awhile after declaring he didn’t catr what people thought, but it did make him think. She felt the weight in her stomach turn sour as the silence stretched. She was nervous. Hannah watched as he signed, listened as he talked. Her head tipped to the side and turned slightly as she listened. She was focusing and paying attention, concentrating on the audible input. She didn’t know why it was happening either, and it was scary.

He scared her too and yet he didn’t. It did churn her gut when he said he was selfish with his dedication. That was okay, it didn’t make her like him as a person less. And long term wasn’t for everyone. But she couldn’t do that again. She’d lost 8 years with Daniel that way. So was he saying he wasn’t interested in more than a fling? He had the right to say so, but that wasn’t her. Maybe…she should go?

His last comment, the implications and understanding played across her features. Hannah was easy to read, not because she had no poker face, she was simply that open. So he would see the hesitation, the contemplation if she should go, and then the understanding as his words sank in. You scare me too. The physical like doesn’t scare me. It’s the deeper attraction that scares me. My life is…so Much right now, and it feels scrambled and chaotic. I want to see where this goes, no matter how short or far. But I feel like I shouldn’t because it’s
a HUGE ask. And it scares me that I’m not scared.

Asimina

He stepped up to her and took her hands in his. “You say it is a huge ask. Tell me… exactly… what is it you are asking?” he asked slowly, deliberately, and with his eyes never leaving hers.

Reilly

Hannah didn’t know. She just knew it felt huge. He was holding both her hands, but instead of feeling stifled, like her voice was gagged, she felt warmth and reassurance. She blinked but she didn’t look away. Her chest rose and fell with her breathes. “Do you think you can like us both? Want more with both of us however ling it is? Because it’s not just me.” How she wished it was, and that thought made her ashamed. “With all the baggage that comes with us because it’s not just going to go away. I know that. It will, but not right away.”

Asimina

Jason’s institute, the manipulator side… the side of him that he felt more and more ashamed of… said to just say yes and kiss her. She’ll buy it, and then you can move on. But that kernal of the decent person he was, or wanted to be, said “I don’t know if I can. I have no experience in this at all. But I know of that I want to try. And if it works, it’s because it was supposed to. And if it doesn’t, well… I don’t want us to spend the rest of our lives wondering ‘What if?’. I have enough regrets… I don’t want to add you…” and he looked at her stomach for a long moment and took a deep breath, “… both of you… to that list.”

Reilly

She didn’t want him to change who he was for her. 8 hours wasn’t long enough to know if he wanted it, if she…they…mattered to him. She had never asked Daniel to change either. She didn’t want them to change, she just wanted someone who wanted to be with her, to choose her, to choose their relationship, over everything else. She didn’t expect it to be easy she just wanted it to matter that much.

Under normal circumstances Hannah could wait and see, but the dynamics were bigger now. There was no more Hannah. At least she didn’t feel like it recently. He didn’t want regrets. Hadn’t she told Alexis that. Would she regret not trying? She would but…it was just all too much. She turned as the tears started and ran back inside. She wasn’t sure what she was running to or from until the smell of the food hit her. Bathroom she was running for a bathroom. There were several, but where were they?

The sound of the door to the half bath closing cut off the sound of her steps. Hannah was sick, several times. She didn’t even eat that much today. But it wasn’t just all morning sickness. She was heart sick and her body reacted physically to get rid of it too.

Asimina

Jason followed her, concern all over his face. And then he heard her throwing up. He took a breath and then went to the kitchen, got a towel and a glass of water, and went and stood by the door… waiting.

Reilly

Hannah didn’t want to go out. She wanted to wait however long it took for him to fall asleep or go to work and sneak out so she didn’t have to deal with this. This…whatever this was. That was limbo though, that wasn’t moving forward and finding her way. But it was scary and making her weepy. Grief, sadness should make her weepy, not being scared. Now she was mad and then her stomach churned again. She sat on the tile floor head back. She hated this, she hated Daniel (how could she hate him?) She hated herself and and putting Jason in this position, and she hated…she couldn’t let herself form that thought. That wasn’t like her.

She couldn’t stay and avoid life on his bathroom floor. She came to Oed to keep going. It just looked different than she expected. She just had to remember different was good and exciting. After a minute the commode flushed and the water in the sink ran. Then the door opened and she stopped short. She wasn’t expecting him to be there. Sorry her gaze somewhere around his chest.

Asimina

He handed her the towel and the water. What for? Being pregnant? and he laughed. Come with me. and he led her to the balcony again, but this time to some chaise lounge chairs. Sit. Relax for a minute. If you want to leave after, its ok. I will understand.

He took a seat and looked at her. “You are overwhelmed, and you are hurt. Probably more than a little mad, too. I get it. And the last thing I want to do is make life harder for you. So… how about this.” and he tookna breath and exhaled slowly before signing.

I like you. More than I should after just these few hours. And I know that you like me. And that scares both of us. So I want to try something. If it works, then we have a better idea of what is going on. If it feels weird or awkward or upsetting, then we have a nice friendly dinner, become friends, and carry on like nothing ever happened. Deal?

Jason

Hannah was watching him, of course, while she was reclined back on the chair. It was a great view, the dim lights from inside giving just enough light to draw attention to his eyes and create a silhouette. She was mad and upset and scared, but he wasn’t making things more difficult. He was making it far too easy.

Deal? She sat up and turned to him. He wanted to try something. Jason if you tell me you want to kiss me and see what happens, I am telling you, you do not want to do that. I just threw up violently in your bathroom. She shook her head, trying to find humor in it all. Sure, deal.

Asimina

He smiled and signed Stand up, then. and he offered her his hand as he stood.

Hannah told herself to stop being nervous, she agreed and it wasn’t that bad right? They were both scared and liked each other. If whatever it was didn’t work then they knew and no problem, right? Except she already knew how she felt when he slipped his hand against her back or held her hand. Which he was doing now while helping her up.

When she was on her feet, he stepped up to her and put his hands on her waist… and he slowly drew her to him and he wrapped his arms around her. He held her tight to him, not speaking, just feeling her against him. His heart pounded, so much he thought she could feel it. He held her for a long time, and then slowly let her go before looking at her and saying Was that connection of more? Or will we be just friends?

Reilly

Hannah could feel it, his heart pounding in his chest, a strong counter point to the way hers was slamming. Could he feel it too? She let her arms wrap around his shoulders and held him tightly. After a long moment she let out a breath she was holding and her head rested on his chest. Warmth and strength and she wasn’t sure she wanted to define it further yet. It was not awkward or weird. The only thing upsetting was when he pulled away. Hannah swallowed noticeably and shook her head. More

Asimina

He smiled at her. We’ll go as slow or as fast as you want. And if yiubchange your mind, know that I won’t regret a second. He took a deep breath. “Now… you quote obviously have nothing in your stomach. Do you want to eat? Or do we just throw caution to the wind and start breaking in every horizontal surface we can find?” and he laughed again, mostly in relief.

Reilly

Hannah laughed, actually laughed, with him. It sounded muffled and off and was heavy rather than light. And it cut off suddenly, like she was embarrassed. “Umm..I may use all my caution on food. But I think I could try and eat.”

Hannah

He nodded and signed You have a great laugh. and then said aloud “Have a seat. I’ll fix you a plate.” He went to the long counter by the kitchen and opened all the containers. A monte cristo sandwich with strawberry jam on the side, some nachos, and a small bowl of gumbo. He also made her a salad and side plate of sushi. Bringing it to her, he said “My mom ate sushi the entire time she was pregnant with me. Said it helped her.” He set the food in front of her on the coffee table and then went and refilled her juice and brought a ginger ale as well. He made himself a plate and came and took a seat next to her. He lifted his glass of water and signed Cheers.

Reilly

You don’t have to…make my plate… But he wS already moving away. Hannah moved over to the couch and sat down. Even inside with the windows open the breeze felt good, if a bit chilled now that it was darker. Hannah looked at all the food he set down. “Thank you.” She took thebginger ale first. She was going to have to remember to carry an antinausea hypo with her if she was going to be visiting Jason…or going out. “I have never had sushi.” She picked a piece up and looked at it. It looked good and she took a bite. Which was a bit comical because the pieces were meant to be bite sized. Hannah didn’t want to take too much if it didn’t agree with her. The fish was amazing and the rice seemed to help settle her stomach. Oh that is very good. She ate several pieces before eating anything else.

Asimina

Everything a growing boy or girl needs. he said witha grin and started eating. After a few bites he said How does your family feel about you being pregnant?

Jason

The gumbo was moved around in the bowl, releasing steam and an herbal aroma. She set the spoon down after taking a bite. They don’t know. I…No one knows but the doctors and you. She took a drink before continuing. I need to tell them, I just…it’s a lot. My mother will probably want me to come home. My father will too, but he is very traditional. He won’t be happy with the circumstances.

Asimina

Jason chewed and thought for a moment, looking out the windows. “Would he be less upset if the father were still with you? Or would it only matter that you were married, even with him having left?” he asked, and picked up a piece of sushi from her plate and popped it in his mouth with a smile.

Reilly

Hannah’s eyes widened, and grinning playfully, slowly pulled the plate of sushi an inch or so closer but not out of his reach. Mine and she took a piece and ate it. She took a bite of the gumbo, made a face, cleared her mouth with her drink and ate again. Better. Gumbo and sushi didn’t mix. She ate while she thought. “Daniel had a reputation, but he was never like that with me.” Her eyes turned far away…another uncomfortable realization. “And that was my choice. My dad isn’t so much stuck on marriage as commitment. A child should have a commitment from both parents to be around and present. It shouldn’t be done lightly. If you make a promise to someone you keep it. In the end though, I think it only matters it’s Daniel. My dad never liked how I waited, and he was…angry when he found out Daniel came back after 3 years and didn’t tell me, and very disappointed I forgave him.”

Asimina

Jason thought again. So when you tell them, tell them the baby is mine. He held up his hand. Wait. Hear me out. He thought again and foregoed signing to make sure he was clear. “First of all, we both know that we are going to see where this goes, right? Two, you said yourself. When you start showing, people will assume it’s mine anyway. So we know its going to happen no matter what. Three, you have enough to deal with right now. Adding even more stress isn’t good for you or the baby. Four, say this doesn’t work out. I don’t know your parents. I won’t ever be in a position for them to know me. If they hate me for ‘abandoning my duties as a father’ it literally makes no change in my life, and it deflects anger from you to me. I mean, yes. It sucks you lying to your parents. But the positives are much greater.” He shrugged and said “Diplomatoc Corps. Sometimes its better to deflect than admit to a negative truth that you can’t change anyway.”

Reilly

Hannah choked on her food. What?! she coughed twice and picked up her glass at the same time she tries to grab his hand and stop him from signing anything else. But he just kept going.

She sat there for a long moment totally befuddled. Jason…what…why?? She shook her head. “That…” she really didn’t know where to begin with that. “First, yeah we said we would see where this goes, but I don’t expect you to lie. Second, yes that is what people will assume, but my parents aren’t stupid, Jason. They know I left Saracen because Daniel left. They will know how far along I am. Whether I lie now or not, when it is born they can do the math. Third lying to them isn’t going to lower my stress level. And four, I am not worried about my dad being angry at me. Disappointed, but,” she shrugs, “I should have been more careful. I didn’t think about when our contraceptive doses overlapped.” She sighed again. “You don’t need to draw his anger for me. Besides if you think you won’t meet them, you aren’t taking into account they will come here at sometime. Besides, it’s a little soon to discuss that anyway, isn’t it? I mean…it’s been… 10 hours…” she also really hated the idea that he knew he could walk away and it wouldn’t bother him. That if this lasted long enough that her parents needed to be told…she was being emotional…stupid hormones

Asimina

Jason turned and looked at her. “Ok. Let’s look at it like this. What if, and yeah this is a huge what if, what if this is the start of something permanent? What if we are together for years and years and years and up old and on a porch swing some where talking about the crazy time we met. The baby would have been raised by both of us, right? I may not be the father, but I’d be ‘dad’. So if that were to happen… again, big ‘if’… why not just start now? I mean… I know you are gonna have a baby. I’m signing on for that before we’ve even kissed, so that either means this is something or I’ve completely lost my mind.” and he grinned. “But either way, I’m here. Ten hours or ten years… no difference. We decided we are gonna date. That means I have to be committed to you-” and he put his hand on belly, and electricity rolled through him as he touched her, “- and whoever this is. Like I said… in for a penny, in for a pound. Its all or nothing… right?”

Reilly

Hannah thought they had both lost their minds. This was crazy! Why was this happening? Hannah didn’t want a baby. Or not now, she always assumed she would eventually. Did he want this because of the baby? No.. he said he never thought about children. What if it didn’t work, that wasn’t fair to him or the child. They would be attached…right? DNA or not that didn’t matter. Why was she even considering dating? Was she? Or was it just Jason?

Then he put his hand on her still flat belly. It was an incredibly intimate touch, and it was electric and warm and she felt it in her chest where her heart stuttered and raced. Her hand rested over his, holding his hand there. What if it was only short term, but what if it wasn’t. What if it was a lifetime and they were happy. What if it was a life time and they weren’t? What if her parents found out she lied for years? Would they tell the baby about Daniel? Should they or not. She had the medical files so she didn’t need anything else. What if he came back? (And that terrified her) Her brain went into over drive, the one thing she did NOT think was wishing Daniel was there instead of Jason. What she was feeling about Jason was crazy and strong and she stood suddenly, but her legs decided they didn’t want to hold her up and she sat back down just as suddenly. Her vision tunneled and there was a ringing in her ears. And she started hyperventilating. Can’t breathe

Asimina

Jason moved. In an instant he had her on her back, resting against the arm of the couch. He lifted her legs and put a cushion underneath her knees, and then poured some water on a napkin and moved to sit by her and put the damp cloth to her forehead and cheeks. Easy… easy… panic attack. Just try to relax. He smiled at her and then said aloud “Not how I thought us laying down the first time would be.”

Reilly

Panic attack…she was having a panic attack? That was more insane than her being pregnant and letting Jason say he was the father. Hannah didn’t panic. Absolutely not. Panic did no good and only made things worse. She was not allowed to have a panic attack. She was the Assistant chief Medical Officer of a contengency of 10,000 officers and crew, working beside a colonial medical system that served 4 million people. A decorated search and rescue team lead. She would not panic. She was having a baby and she’d met a guy she liked. That was not a big deal…it was a HUGE deal. And she was alone with all of it in this huge colony, and…the more she tried to think the worse she felt.

The damp cloth was shockingly cool against her skin that felt suddenly like she’d been in the sun too long. The cloth felt good though, something very tangible to focus on. He wanted her to relax, well that wasn’t going to happen thinking about his last statement. Not a panic inducing thought but certainly not relaxing. She nodded for lack of being able to do anything but try to breathe. Relax…she needed to relax because her heart might pound through her chest cavity and her lungs didn’t want to work right. Panic…she was panicking....Hannah did not panic, but she was.

Silence…silence was relaxing. She reached up behind her ears. Her hands shook and her arms were strangely numb but felt like burning pins and needles too. She fumbled to get the implants off. The silence would help, right?

Asimina

Strong hands caught hers and held tight, but not confining. He squeezed gently and moved her hands to her chest, resting them on her stomach and gave them a pat. He looked at her and put a finger to his lips. Quiet. It already was. The noise was her moving and grunting and gasping. He gently rubbed the damp cloth across her face, and then he pursed his lips and blew gently across her skin, chilling the water and making it cooler. His hands held hers, and he kept repeating the process in silence: wipe, blow, squeeze… wipe, blow, squeeze.

Reilly

Her eyes went wide when he grabbed her hands, stopping her from fumbling with her implants. His hands were warm and his grip strong. She was surprised hebstopped her but not scared. It brought back a memory. When the implants had first been turned on. There was so much sound and it felt so incredibly loud, and no one had spoken yet. And then they did and it was confusing and terrifying. She had panicked and tried to rip them off. She had forgotten.

It was quiet, but it wasn’t silent. It was a difference most people didn’t distinguish, but that was okay. She watched his gaze for a long quiet moment and at least tried to be still, even if she couldn’t stop the gasping. She could feel, through her hands where he held them, the irratic rise and fall of her breaths. He created a rhythm - she would breathe out as he wiped her face, hold it so she could hear his breath as he blew and feel the coolness and breathe in as he squeezed her hand. And it repeated. After several repitions her breath smoothed out and several more they were calm. Her pulse still pounded erratically but it would follow. It was all connected. Then the sudden exhaustion would follow. Hannah knew this, she was a doctor and had treated panic many times. That didn’t help her help herself. Doctors were the worst patients.

Asimina

Jason slowly released her hands and let her relax a bit more before saying Better? Or do we need to get you to the hospital? He reached for a glass of water and held it out to her. Do you need to throw up again?

Reilly

Hannah grabbed his hand as he released her hands and squeezed once before letting go. Yes, no, yes?…wait… She slowly pushed herself up to sit a little more upright. She took the water and drank slowly. She set fingers to her carotid pulse and watched the chronometer,
counting silently to herself. She flexed her hands and feet but the tingling was gone. She was a little light headed when she first sat up but that seemed to be fading as well. Yes better. No hospital, I don’tthink. No, my stomach is fine. That was…horrible. She did not want to do that again. For the moment Hannah felt like she’d been climbing a failing cliffface for 12 hours. She steadily drank the whole glass of water because she had no idea what to say or do at that point.

Well that is certainly a story of a first date. She smiled a little, a mix of self consciousness and amusement.

Asimina

Second. Our first was buying an apartment. and he winked at her with a smile. He stood and walked over to the table of food. He came back with a small, bite sized something. “Candied ginger, mint, and citrus. It will help settle you.” and he held it out to her.

She took it and popped it in her mouth. She sucked on it exile she set her head back on the cushions and closed her eyes. It was a weird flavor combination and the best thing she had tasted in weeks. Where did you get these because I am going to have to buy these in bulk. I am going to name them a-m-b-r-o-s-i-a. Not because the flavor was amazing, it was, but it settled everything. Just like he said it would. She opened her eyes and looked at him with a grin. Thank you.

He sat back and looked at her. Do you want to talk about it? Or pretend it didn’t happen?

Reilly

Talk about it? Sure let’s talk about the crazy lady you let into your house and her emotional break down. Who is more crazy? Me for losing it or you for letting me in? Hannah grinned at him. Really though, as much as I wish that hadn’t happened. And I swear it never has and that is unsettling, can’t really pretend it didn’t.

Asimina

He shrugged and said It is understandable, though. He shook his hands. Yeah, he was going to have to practice to keep up signing. “You at least have hormones to use an excuse. Me? My o ly excuse for doing this is thst I just want to.” and he chuckled. “Ansd I don’t even really know why!”

Reilly