A warm wash of air tousled her long blond hair as she tilted her head up towards the sky and absorbed the feeling of warmth on her face. Yes, they were in a dome with manufactured weather, but it was no less real and probably even more vivid when memories of home allowed her to borrow ‘reality’ for a bit. And in borrowing old memories, she could ignore her own reality for a time.

Ylana knew she’d have to tell him sooner rather than later. The timing was terrible, even more so now that there was a powerful being roaming the planet hinting that he had plans for her. The intimate touch of another’s mind was something that was usually welcome, but with him it felt like an intrusion. Yes, she could push him out, but that took control. Would she always be able to block him? Would there be a point where she couldn’t? And if so, what then?

Even though she was trying hard to focus on old moments of bliss and contentment, it was hard for Ylana not to slip into worry, or worse yet, old memories she kept under tight control, locked away in the far reaches of her mind. Memories that she feared Leamas would find and use to destroy her, or worse.

It was one thing for people to learn she was telekinetic along with her very strong telepathy, but she rarely talked about Moset’s experiments on her and her sister, even to Michael. It wasn’t a secret and when it had been necessary to talk it all, she had, but especially for the last several years, Ylana had been happy to leave that chapter of her past behind. Was that realistic though, or had she been exceedingly naive?

So many painful moments of being pushed to try this or manipulate that. Never mind that she’d had had parts of her brain exposed and they had stimulated the little sensors attached to try and achieve their ends regardless of the pain inflicted. The truth was that she had had strong enough dormant abilities that, with enough coaxing, her mind could effect objects without her physical intervention. Crell Moset had thought himself to be a genius. She and everyone else sane had thought him a monster.

And yet… she had chosen to submit to his experiments, knowing full well what they were trying to learn from powerful Betazoids and somehow apply to the Jem’Hadar. She had chosen that path to save Kema, her sister, who was dying from whatever they had done to her. She could have handled no more and so Ylana had offered herself in her sister’s place. A noble gesture with a high price. She had lived- they both had, but her sacrifice had only prolonged Kema’s life and her suffering. Still, Kema had told her often in her broken speech that she would have rather had those last years with her and Grar than to have died on that Godsforsaken station amongst the dead and miserable. At least she had been granted some dignity.

It hurt- remembering Kema. It didn’t always, but today it did. Though only her half sister, they had grown up together and had been extremely close. Right now she missed her deeply and wished she had been here to meet Nikala, their mother’s namesake. Just like she wished her mother had survived trying to drive the Dominion off their planet so that she could have eventually met her grandchildren. But it was not to be.

Maybe she should call her father tomorrow, tell him the news. After I tell Michael, of course. And maybe her Napean father would come spend some time here with them. She missed him and he was the only living family member she had that she was close with. Her mother’s family had been better to her after she had temporarily run the Fourth House, but there was too much drama and family politics. For her they didn’t exactly hold much love. At least here with Michael and Nikala, she had all the love she needed. And more with another child, if it works out. She dared not think about it much beyond that. Losing the twins before Nikala had been a devastating experience and even though her pregnancy with Nikala had gone fairly smoothly, there was still a thread of anxiety that ran through her.

Opening her eyes, she could feel the sudden tension in her body. Almost reflexively, she reached out to push the glass of water back onto the patio table beside her. Looking around, no one had seen the floating glass. Ylana sighed resignedly and wondered what Leamas was up to right now. Whatever happened, she knew she had to be vigilant. For all she knew it could mean the difference between life and death.

~Ylana Eviros, CSO