Posted by Lieutenant Commander Joe Milligan (XO) in Cross struggling within-

Posted by Lieutenant Miriam Cross (Chief Medical Officer) in Cross struggling within-

Posted by Lieutenant Miriam Cross (Chief Medical Officer) in Cross struggling within-
Posted by… suppressed (12) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Cross was rubbing her tired eyes,just as Hunter entered for his night shift ‘’Doctor Cross you do look tired ,rough day?’’ he asked as he made his way for the first cup of coffee ‘’Say’’ the male doctor went on ‘’You don’t know how my mug got broken in two do you?’‘. Seeing Cross did not respond he felt that maybe she was not up to converse.
Then the N.O entered ‘’Cross why don’t you leave,I’ll give the over to doctor Hunter’’ .She nodded and the only word was a simple ‘’Good night’‘.

Out of sickbay the female doctor headed to the gym,she eyed the black punch bag which she used in the past Not any more Cross sighed. Putting on the punching gloves she headed to the smaller punch bag.Tired as she felt Cross did not want to give in ‘’ Anything for a good night sleep’’ she muttered under her breath.

Remembering way back the trainer repeated that one should hit the bag not push it.Commonly referred to as pushing punches, which are extremely powerful punches that aim to destroy the target and have longer contact with it to cause maximum damage. Snap punches, on the other hand, aim to have minimal contact with the target by just hitting it and immediately returning after making the contact. Snapping is considered to have a stronger effect than pushing as it allows you to punch faster and harder using less energy.

With that in mind Cross started to exercise but not for long ,with perspiration running down her face the female doctor had to stop and fell on one knee breathing heavily.The frustration she felt was both painstakingly tough and crushing.

Cross CMO .

Joe walked in just in the middle of Cross swinging and ooomphing as she was swinging at the small bag. He couldn’t help but to be quiet and watch her with his brows knitted. Something was wrong with what was going on here, but he couldn’t quite put his finger on it. Finally, as she had given up, he walked across the gym toward the large black body bag. He turned to her as he passed and smiling asked her “Learning how to hurt them so can fixed them Miri? ” He shook his head and fished by saying, “Business must be slow. ” Joe was wearing a workout outfit with a sleeveless top. He looked for a clean pair of gloves that would fit and finding them began to slip them on as he stood in front of the bag. Looking over at Miri he decided not to kid her anymore. Not for a while anyway Joe started his workout simply three fast jabs with his right hand followed by two with his left before switching them up Then suddenly stepping back, he gave the bag two flying kicks followed by a series of jabs and upper cuts

As Cross had one knee on the floor ,she raised her head to look at Joe .Had he looked closely the look she gave him was of hostility and scorn.

Joe then stepped away sweat now dripping off his brow and looking over at Miri said with a laugh as he panted. “Not as young as I once was Miri .” He took a quick drink of water and then attacked the bag again. Finally stopping again, he asked Cross, “So I don’t see you down here much Miri, What’s the occasion? “

Lt.Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO

Something inside her snapped and with all the strength she could muster attacked Joe,slamming her body with a brute force into his ‘’So now its rubbing salt on an old wound is it!’’ Cross said through clenched teeth.’‘Want to know what’s the occasion do you!’’ the doctor exclaimed. ‘’The psychiatrist would call it a psychological, irrational or obsessive fear of something ‘’.

Cross CMO.

Joe was caught off guard by Cross’ sudden metamorphosis from a sweaty slim little thing who only hours ago was telling him she liked him to a sweaty slim little thing who was imitating the charge of an underweight bull calf. As she hit him, he was forced back a half step. But this only helped then as he bent town and stepped forward against Cross’ body. He wrapped one arm around her waist as he pushed forward with his shoulder. Taking another step forward he had deftly tossed Cross across his shoulder in a fireman’s carry. “Gods Eyes Miri!” he groused at her. “What in the name of a Klingon’s moustache are you yelling about?”.

‘’How dare you!’’ Cross screamed ‘’Let go of me,its your fault for taunting me ‘’.

She was across his shoulder, legs kicking as if she were trying to take a swim as her fists flailed away trying to beat on his chest. As he held her there the only thing, he could think of was her weight loss. She was skinny as a bean pole! She weighed hardly anything! He stood there for a moment letting her wear herself out a bit my all the flailing and hitting on him. Finally, he reached over and slapped her backside a good one and told her in an unyielding voice. “Now stop all that! You want to tell me something then let me know why you’re beating on me and then I might let you take a few free swings. As it is you may pass out with all that nonsense!” He paused again until he could feel her start to slow down a bit over there on his shoulder. He then sighed and asked her. “Can I put you down now do you think?”

Lt. Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO.

It worked soon enough, Cross got tired more then she had been previously ‘’You can put me down ‘’ she did sound defeated physically ,mentally and emotionally distressed.
‘’I’m tired but do not want to fall asleep’’ the doctor rested her head against Joe’s chest ,if the Cmdr had been baffled by her then ,he would surly be more baffled now.

Cross CMO.

The truth be told Joe had always been baffled by Miri. Her moods had always kept things new and exciting. Of course, Joe had to admit to himself that his own ideas of a good time were somewhat different than others. He suspected that Miri wasn’t entirely all Maltese. With her temper flaring as quick as it did, he had always suspected some Sicilian, some Calabrese or maybe some Saxon in her.
But as of late Miri had been acting more than ever. At first, he thought it was his sudden appearance in her life. Now however he wasn’t quite sure. “Tired but don’t want to sleep? ” Joe asked. He knew better than to tell Miri that made no sense. So, he did something that might sound to her like it made sense. He held out his left forearm in a gentlemanly fashion and reached over to lift her right hand and place it on his arm.” There we go, hold on tight. You won’t fall you’ll get your quarters alright and people will start a lot of rumors about old people.”

Lt. Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO.

Cross slapped his hand ‘’I’m not in the mood for role playing ‘’ and instead dug her nails on Joe’s back shirt.She walked with him in complete silence ,anyone who passed by wondering what was going on, the female doctor gave them a menacing glare .

Stopping near her quarters Cross looked up at Joe ‘’Cmdr I’m afraid,afraid of the recurrent nightmares that has tormented me since I returned back on the ship ‘’. Cross was thinking how to put the words in a coherently sentence ‘’I cannot leave this is the only place I get to call home’‘.

Cross CMO.

Joe winced at first as he felt Cross’s nails dig into his back. It bothered him for a moment. Soon though he grew almost used to it. Well almost. Joe turned toward Cross as yet one more person passed them looked at them suspiciously. “You know Miri I sort of liked the other way better. I wasn’t trying to play make believe I was only wanting us to look a bit normal as we walked down the hall. ” He winced again before he continued. “As it is I look as though you’re kidnapping me or that I’m your dummy and you’re about to make your voice come out of my mouth.”

Joe could have been talking to the walls ‘’I don’t care what others think,perhaps gossip would go around at a warp speed not yet invented, that the Cmdr has some infectious disease who refused to go to sickbay and the CMO had to go and fetch him’‘.

He listened as she talked about the recurring nightmares. Joe closed his eyes for a moment as he listened to Cross. post-traumatic stress Miri. ” Joe said to her simply. “You don’t need to worry about it. It’s nothing that can’t be treated. I had to do it after some Adorian almost …well never mind what he almost did. The point is you can whip it. What about that Wong guy we have one board have you told him about it? That’s what those guys do.”

Lt. Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO

The door swooshed open and Cross pushed him inside ‘’What? Cmdr have you lost it, the Wong guy is the last person that should know’’ the female doctor blurted out. ‘’And not a word to Hunter either,I’m going to take a shower, meanwhile decide if you want to stay with me to-night.If I find you’re gone then I have no other alternative but to leave , go back to sickbay and find some medicine to keep me awake ‘’.

With that she entered the bathroom and while showering Cross was hoping Joe would stay for she could barley keep her eyes open …too many sleepless nights were definitely taking their toil.

Cross CMO.

Joe simply listened to Cross. Not saying a word. He had been yanked back and forth like a yoyo by Cross and her mood swings since coming aboard. It was starting to tire him out mentally. He could only sigh as he watched her disappear into the rest room. He leaned against a chair looking toward the door for a moment as if he would leave. He sighed and shook his head at his own weakness. He knew he couldn’t do that. She still needed someone, and it might even be him. And he couldn’t find it in himself to leave her again.

So, in the end Joe sat down and waited for Miri to come out of the bathroom. He sat there staring off into nothing for a moment with his hands across his stomach and was half asleep by the time Miri came out of the bathroom.

Lt.Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO

She came out wearing a pair of pink pajamas .Seeing Joe still there Cross was relieved.Putting the dim red night light on she called out to Joe ‘’Cmdr come under the bed sheets I would surely feel guilty if I left you sleeping in that manner.’‘

Once her head hit the pillow the doctor fell asleep,for once since the nightmares begun she felt at ease and secured.All was well for the next couple of hours,then it started. The first sign was Cross mumbling incoherently and trashing about.Her hands were in front of her face as if to protect herself from something that wasn’t even there . She started to scream and finally was jolted in a sitting position and woke up,it was as if someone had thrown a bucket of water on her ,she was drenched in sweat,for some time Cross stood there staring at the foot of the bed terrified and lost in her own world.

Cross CMO.

Joe was tired. He had a big day tomorrow and needed some sleep. He merely kicked off his boots, went into Cross’s bedroom and lay down beside her. The last thing he remembered before he fell to sleep was mumbling to Cross,” I hope you still don’t snore. ”

It was a couple of hours later when the scream happened. Somewhere in his subconscious Joe became aware of the scream before the rest of him did. His eyes weren’t opened completely until he had sat straight up in bed with one hand steadying himself and the other balled up into a fist. He watched as Miri bolted upright. Snapping fully awake he said in a stern voice as he wrapped his arms around her, “Miri, Miri wake up calm down! Take a deep breath. Long deep breaths. Look around you you’re okay!”

Lt. Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO

Cross turned her head slowly with wide open eyes staring at Joe,it took her a full minute for her brain to register that he was actually there .She did as Joe said and looked around ‘’The nightmare ..I’m sleeping and wake up to see a small figure at the foot of the bed,I can only see his form, a boy not older then three to four years ‘’ the doctor took a deep breath before continuing ‘’I can see his red diabolic evil eyes, as he climbs on the bed moving towards me with something shining in his hand carrying an intent to harm me…this heinous being gives a repugnant sinister smile showing his rotten teeth ‘’.

Now Miriam buried her face in her pillow and cried,she could not take the negative emotions anymore .

Cross CMO.

Joe stared at Miri in shock. One thing he had never seen from her was crying like this. Maybe she was broken? Oddly enough it was the first thought that popped into his mind. All he could think of to do at first was to reach out and place his hand on her shoulder. He stroked her shoulder and let her cry for a bit before he said to her. “It’s a dream Miri. Just a dream and you’re real. “

Mike leaned down to brush his lips against Cross’s sweat covered temple and caressed her hair with his hand as he said in a calm quieting voice “You close your eyes now and I’ll sit guard over you by your bed. Anyone comes through here I will personally send them back where they came from.” Joe got up from the bed then and brought back a chair from the outside room. He set the chair beside the bed and then took Miri’s hand in his. “See? he spoke to her. “I’ll be here the whole night through on guard duty for you. Just you breathe easy girl. Nice deep breaths and get you a good night’s sleep.”

Lt. Cmdr. Joe Milligan XO

Miriam laid on her side ,her eyes never leaving the man she once thought was more then just a lover ‘’Joe’’ she called him by name ‘’When I found out that I was pregnant knowing the baby could not stay on the ship I thought your family would be more then happy to raise him up but then you came to say goodbye,leaving to take care of your family’s business …I..I did not want to make a scene, to scream,call out ,telling you to stop ,that there was a part of you growing inside of me .Since you did not even ask if I wanted to go along with you, I decided to say nothing at all ‘’.

What is done is done Cross thought before closing her eyes.

Cross CMO.