<much needed (?) snip)>

“Sure you would,” she let out a small laugh. “You would be in intel officer and still have a way of waking up a priest in Boston at two am. By letting others define you, you are giving up your life. I can not say whether or not we would have different Admiralty or if we would be in a war right now based on things you did. It wouldn’t matter anyway. That is the past and we can not change that but we can change the future. Excuse my bluntness but you are not that important or unique. Sure you were on those missions in the past but if I have learned one thing in life it is that everyone can always be replaced. The seedier elements in Starfleet operate under the premise of anything is acceptable as long as it achieves a mission. If you hate it or what they made you in the past then get out. There is always a way to get out. It is just whether or not you want it bad enough.” Vanessa just gave Tom a tough pill to swallow but if he did there would be a way to change the direction in Tom’s life to be the one he wanted and not the one he was assigned.

Vanessa Slade CNS

Tom smiled but it wasn’t warm.

“You’re right, I’m not important. I’m so unimportant that the universe has declared me totally forgettable and blessed me with looks that let me wonder into a crowd and have my pursuers loose me. As I’m so replaceable, then there’s no point in you trying to ‘tough love’ me into a better outlook. Contrary to popular belief, I like my job. The only thing I don’t like is that I’m given the highest risk missions due to my particular skills. Skills which apparently millions have as you have just told me that I’m not unique and replaceable at any moment. Anyone can do my job and copy my accomplishments in nearly exact detail.”

Tom sat back and resumed his neutral expression. There was nothing to tell if he believed his words or not.

“Was that the result you were hoping to achieve?”

Tom wasn’t sure what her objective was but he didn’t put it past IntSec to attempt a PsyOps test to see if he was still a viable asset. Who better than a counselor to carry it out.

• Tom, IntSec

“Tonight? I needed someone to wake up a priest in Boston at two am,” Vanessa said shrugging it off. “This is not an official counseling session but one person talking to another in the downtime between comm calls. You were the one that hinted you weren’t happy with your current position in life. I mean you used the words seduced and manipulated. For the record, it was Vanessa that was wondering about Tom and not Lt. jg. Slade trying to give Lt. Jarvis a job performance review.” Nothing in her mannerism or demeanor spoke to Vanessa taking any offense to what Tom had said.

“When I said you were not unique it was more related to your job than your identity. I don’t know what hardships you have endured over the years but hardships are personal. Everyone sees and feels them differently. What I did say was in an employment aspect everyone is and has to be replaceable. I tell people that because it is easy to both see others only as their job or yourself as a job. Take Lt. Hicks for example. Big, burly, tough security officer but the man can paint like Picasso. If I only see him as a security guard then I am not seeing the whole person. When Lt. Hicks is seventy and can no longer climb through the mud and the muck is he replaceable…absolutely. When Brian Hicks is seventy and takes up teaching art classes at the local college is he no longer a security officer? No, but he is that plus something more.” Vanessa didn’t want to alienate or isolate Tom so she did not add or ask him about what something more he wanted to be. Instead, she focused on herself.

“I mean right now I am a counselor with a tough love attitude but one day I am going to be someone’s Mrs. Ex with a passel of kids, a mortgage, and a custody agreement. I say Ex because I am no sure who could ever survive a meeting with my family,” she joked.

Vanessa Slade CNS

“Your intent may not have been to minimize myself, my position, or my accomplishments that no-one will ever see but, that’s what it seemed like you were attempting.” Tom replied, “I am very aware of my insignificance in the grand scheme of the thousand spheres yet I still do what I can rather than give up. I know I come off as apathetic it’s just, difficult, to build relationships and develop social skills with my particular mutation.”

Tom got up and went to his replicator.

“Raspberry water, cold.” he ordered then turned to Vanessa, “Would you like something to drink?”

Tom returned to his seat.

“As for your family, I don’t know anything that isn’t on record so I will have to take your word for it. If they’re so difficult, why risk a happy, supposedly healthy, relationship by involving them?”

• Tom, IntSec