Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in Temp Quarters- Assessing the Situation

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Temp Quarters- Assessing the Situation

Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in Temp Quarters- Assessing the Situation
Posted by… suppressed (11) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)

Roman sighed a long sigh. “I wanted it to stop, the weight, the… emotional pain, I suppose? All of it. It had nothing to do with Rand or the Sentinel or anything now and everything to do with… certain events in my past. The note was… Well, I suppose preparing, but more just… wanting? Without a concrete when or where?”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

She nodded slowly. “These things have a way of coming back and hitting us in ways we can’t always anticipate.” Leah blew out a breath. “Look, I know you just want to get through this as fast as possible, but part of my evaluation is figuring out what happens after you leave here. We’re making progress, Roman. It might not feel that way, but we are. And we’ve been at this awhile. Under normal circumstances I would never keep going for so long. But we’re both a bit tired and could use some food. Let’s take an hour break. You can have something to eat, have a shower, freshen yourself up. Feel free to take a quick nap, read, play your violin, hang out with Pipkin, whatever feels good for you right now. I’ll be back and we’ll go from there.”

Leah pushed herself to her feet, and stretched, feeling her circulation. She wasn’t giving him the choice of a break because it wasn’t just about him in this moment. She needed to be okay to continue too. “I’ll be back soon.”

She slipped out of the quarters and maintained a stoic face as she moved to Sickbay to both give an update to Kreed and see if she could contact Jay’s parents.

~Leah Hart, NP

Once Leah left, Roman wasn’t able to hold himself back as he started crying again. Instead of curling up on the bed like he wanted to do, he pulled his violin out of its case and began to play. His posture was perfect, his form textbook. The tune he played was melancholic, full of deep pain. The tempo slow and sad.

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

It was just over an hour before Hart returned.

She stepped in after have a cat nap, something to eat and redoing her hair. She could hear the music before she stepped in and didn’t say anything as she crossed the threshold. Instead, Leah took a seat on the end of his bed, closed her eyes and just listened to him play.

~Leah Hart, NP

He’d already been playing for about forty minutes so it wasn’t a surprise when he stopped not too long after. The song finished on a long, sad low note. He set the violin down very gently and turned to Leah. “I heard you enter. I hope you don’t mind my finishing my piece.”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

“Not at all,” she said, opening her eyes. “I enjoy listening to you play. I didn’t want to disturb you in the middle of your piece.”

Leah gesturing with her chin to his violin. “Did playing help at all?”

~Leah Hart, NP

“It always does. Just not… Enough,” Roman replied with a sigh. “Your enjoyment makes me happy. I rarely play for others.”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

“What would make you change that? Do you need a reason to play for others? A better environment to?” she asked.

~Leah Hart, NP

Roman considered it. “A reason, maybe. I don’t know, I just… I play for myself. I’ve played since I was old enough to hold a bow, but I haven’t done any sort of public playing since… Oooh, secondary school?”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

She nodded. “I get that. I used to dance competitively. Now I just dance at clubs for fun, but it’s not quite the same.”

Leah drew in a slow breath, letting it fill her lungs. She held it a moment before she let it out. “I spoke with Henry.” She smiled. “He seems like a lovely person. Someone who cares about you a great deal.”

~Leah Hart, NP

Roman glanced up and then away awkwardly. “I know he does.” He said softly. “Please tell me you didn’t tell him anything too… specific.”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

This was one of those tricky moments. Was she completely honest, or did she not throw Rand under the proverbial bus. “You asked me not to, and ethically I’m not allowed to share anything with a patient’s family that they haven’t agreed I can share. Outside of certain circumstances, of course.”

“They want to talk to you, Roman. They have been wanting to for awhile. They were wanting to wait until you were ready, but I think we all know you’ll never think you are ready. So I think we should call them anyway. Rip off that bandaid and see for yourself. You are a part of their family whether you think you deserve to be or not, and it seems like this family is pretty determined to stand by you.”

~Leah Hart, NP

Roman seemed relieved by her words. “I don’t suppose ‘maybe later’ is an option?” He tried. He wasn’t sure what the problem was but the idea of talking to them.. it wasn’t comfortable. And the fact he didn’t know why made it worse.

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

“What would talking to them later accomplish? How would that help?” Leah said.

~Leah Hart, NP

“By making it so I don’t have to do it now?” Roman replied.

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

Hart shrugged. “To what end? We already agreed that you need to talk to them, and that they want to talk to you, so how does putting off that conversation make your current situation better?”

~Leah Hart, NP

“It… doesn’t?” Roman answered. “I don’t know, I-I just… What would I even say?”

~ Cmdr Alden, XO/CSO

Her smile was soft and she leaned forward ever so slightly, but not so far that she would fall off the bed. “Roman, I know having control of the variables makes things predictable. That can make things feel safe. Maybe you don’t have to know what to say. Maybe we just start with making the call and seeing what happens?”

~Leah Hart, NP