Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Galley/Lounge- Holding Boundaries

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in Galley/Lounge- Holding Boundaries

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Leah Hart (Nurse Practitioner/Counseling) in Galley/Lounge- Holding Boundaries
Posted by… suppressed (19) by the Post Ghost! 👻
She sat in her quarters and looked around at the blank walls. In her mind she could see what the space would look like when she could finally decorate but right now she hadn’t had the time. Nor the energy. Her days were busy and work was intense. It was more or less what she was used to but the venue was different and rather than a rotation of people, her days were spent mostly around the same people. It wasn’t a negative thing, just a difference she had noted.

What was harder was the sudden drop in the spaces where she could be social. Sure, she could hang out in galley slash lounge, or go workout, and she did both those things, but she was missing the variety. For someone as active and social as she was, this was an adjustment that was harder to make. She knew it would take time, but in the meanwhile she would have to work harder to negate some of the loneliness that was already seeping in.

Her comm announced an incoming call. Leah pushed herself to her feet in one graceful motion and sat at the desk. She activated the screen and braced herself after seeing the source was from Aldebaran III. One of two options, and neither were particularly great just now. She could ignore the call but that would only make it worse. She plastered a smile onto her face as a woman appeared. Anyone who saw them together always commented that they could have bene twins. But of course Ana Isabel (who went by Anabel) was nine years older than her and had lighter coloured hair and their mother’s green leaning hazel eyes. Leah slightly darker complexion, hair and brown eyes were all from her father. [O]Hello, Anabel.[o]

[o]Oh, you actually answered. Wonders never cease!,[o] Anabel said with a smirk.

[o]Actually, it’s quite late but I couldn’t sleep, otherwise I wouldn’t have answered. And you could have sent a message so we could arrange a time that was good for both of us.[o] Evan as she said it, Leah chastised herself for even mentioning it. Doing something that was equally convenient for others and took them into consideration was not her sister’s way. Or her mother’s for that matter.

[o]Oh, don’t be like that. I just thought it would be nice to chat given you’re who knows where now. Mom said you weren’t stopping to visit first.[o]

Leah shook her head. [o]There wasn’t time. I was on six ships in two weeks and when I got here I’ve had to jump right in.[o]

Anabel waved her hand. [o[Well, it’s good to know you’re alive. How’s the new assignment? Is being on a ship weird?[o]

Leah drew in a deep breath. [o]It’s very different, but there’s lots I’m enjoying about being here.[o] As per her personal rules, she kept the details of her life out of the conversation as much as possible. Sometimes that seemed impossible, but where she could, she tried to not let her sister and mother grab hold of things to use against her later. Everything went so much smoother that way, at least for her.

[o]What did Daro say about you leaving?[o]

Sh!t, she thought. Leah deeply regretted opening her comm when she was drunk one night and spilling anything about her relationship with Daro Kelreden that had gone rather badly all told. She took a measured breath and maintained a neutral expression. [o]Daro and I broke up… three months ago. He has no opinion on the matter because I never told him.[o]

Dismay swept across Anabel’s face. [o]Oh no! Oh, I’m so sorry, Leah. He seemed like such a nice guy. What happened? Why didn’t you tell me?[o] Anabel actually looked hurt.

Oh, there were a lot of reasons, but Leah was not about to share those with her sister. Not only were they not close enough for that, but the last thing she needed was for her mother to get a hold of all the details. As much as she did love her sister, Anabel was not a person she could safely share her secrets with without deeper repercussions that Leah just honestly didn’t want to deal with. [o]I honestly just didn’t want to go over it then, and I’m not up for discussing it now. Just need to deal with it myself.[o]

[o]Okay then, don’t have to get all weird about it.[o]

Leah just smiled and didn’t take the bait. [o]How’s Randall?[o]

Anabel’s face lit up. [o]Oh, he’s good. Been really busy with his caseload, but he’s gotten word that he’s up for Assistant Colonial Counsel.[o]

[o]That’s wonderful![o] Leah said, genuinely happy for her brother-in-law.

Anabel leaned forward, suddenly shy as she flushed. [o]And well, I do have some news as well.[o]

Leah never prodded and only ever responded to what was asked because to do otherwise was to have the expectation of reciprocity. That was not possible if she was to maintain loving boundaries with her very complicated family. She simply nodded and waited.

[o]Well, Randall and I have finally decided to try for a baby![o] she gushed. [o]It just seemed like the right time because I’m done my residency and both our careers are going well. We’re so excited! And you’ll get to be an auntie![o]

Leah smiled and it wasn’t entirely a facade. [o]I’m happy for you.[o]

They chatted for a few more minutes. Well, Anabel just gushed about all the details that Leah honestly didn’t want to hear about, but creating confrontation by interrupting in this case was not worth the backlash. So Leah smiled and nodded and let her sister be excited. She had every right to be, after all. It was a big step in her life. But Leah also knew that there would be a trickle down that she needed to prepare for.

[o]Well, that all sounds great. I do need to go now though. I have a shift in the morning and it’s quite late,[o] Leah said.

[o]Alright, well, you can call me you know. Let me know how you’re getting on?[o] Leah nodded. [o]We miss you, Leah. I’m always going to wish you were back here with us, but I know you need to do you thing.[o]

For once Leah felt like the comment came from a genuine place. [o]Thanks, Anabel. I’ll talk to you later.[o]

[o]Bye![C]

The call ended and she was left sitting there and trying to work out how she was feeling. Untethered was one word for it but also resigned. She was truly happy for her sister but all she could think about was how every call going forward with her mother was going to be that much more difficult. Feeling her flurry of emotions, Leah braced her elbows on the desk and held her head. Anabel was a lovely person and Leah did love her, but she was so deep under their mother’s influence that she couldn’t see how Liliana tried to manipulate and control everyone around her.

After a minute, Leah felt antsy. Though it was 0015 and she should be going to bed, she threw a colourful floral tunic over her leggings and left her quarters.

~Leah Hart, NP

Stepping into the eating and social space of the ship, it was rather quiet as she suspected it would be. What she wanted was to go out on the town, find a club, down several shots of tequila and dance till her brain stopping thinking about her frustrating family. Maybe she’d meet someone, maybe she wouldn’t, but at least she wouldn’t be alone in her quarters wishing she were elsewhere.

It was hard to get her bearings here outside of work, but Leah was doing her best to be patient with herself. These things took time and effort. Truthfully, she hadn’t had much downtime since she had arrived and while she would rectify that soon, there was a certain level of overtime she needed to do in order to get caught up and carve out a space for her practice here on a ship that wasn’t intuitively designed for it.

She had pondered opening one of the bottles of Bobal or Petit Verdot. Her abuela had insisted she take them with her when she had popped in briefly before shipping out. But drinking in her quarters alone was sad, and besides it was a terrible waste of really nice wine. That wine was meant for celebration.

Wrapping the chunky loose knit lavender shawl around her snugly, Leah moved over to the stasis pantries to see if there was anything enticing. Sure enough there was a lone piece of chocolate cake that looked like it had a decently decadent fudgy frosting. She smiled at a crewmember who was just finishing their mea, looking like they had just come off shift and were ready for bed. She’d let them be. Grabbing a glass of water, she sat at a table near one of the windows and watched the stars for a moment, entranced. Yes, that was a part of the appeal. It always had been. Wonder, curiosity, possibility. She had inherited a wanderlust from somewhere, but she wasn’t sure from whom. Slicing her fork through the moist layers, Leah tried to banish her sisters words to the recesses of her mind. Still, her mention of Daro had twisted her emotions just enough. It wasn’t even Anabel’s fault, either, yet her sister’s sadness at the breakup made her uneasy- especially since her sister had no clue how lucky Leah had been to get out while she could. She slipped the cake into her mouth, willing the chocolate to replace four shots of tequila and knowing, no matter how good a recipe, it wouldn’t even come close.

~Leah Hart, NP

It was a late night for Rand and the captain. That wasn’t unusual though. Rand was used to keeping odd hours. She was sitting at an out of the way table, two PaDDs sitting on the table. She was writing on one and scrolling on another. A cup of tea was sitting between them, and she sipped from it every so often.

Yeoman Rand

Leah sliced through more of the cake, the tines of the fork hitting the plate with a sharp ting. She glanced up and saw Rand and smiled, despite her annoyance. “Hey, Rand, what are the chances I could requisition a bar on this ship, you know, for crew wellbeing and all?” she said, her expression fairly neutral.

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand looked up, seemingly startled to be addressed. She hadn’tnoticed anyone come in. She spotted Hart and smiled gently. “Gorshin had a fully stocked liquor cabinet. He keeps it tightly controlled though to make sure no one over indulges. Cook Haddon worked as a bartender all through Academy. When we have parties and such she mixes drinks. She’s back there now, would you like me to ask her to make you something?”

Yeoman Rand

Leah chuckled mostly to herself. Overindulging was kind of the point right now. “I’m not sure shots of tequila would quite count or be allowed. It’s okay, I appreciate the offer though.” She cut into more of the cake. “I do miss having a place to just go and let loose. Parties are great, but they require planning. Sometimes I just want to go, have some drinks, and dance.” Or in the case of tonight, a lot of drinks.

~Leah Hart, NP

“You’d be surprised how often impromptu parties happen on board. The galley is usually more subdued, but the rec room usually gas something going on. And really it doesn’t take much planning. Just spread the word, insert a data disk of music and voilà.” Rand smiled. She didn’t drink. It bothered her. Never helped her relax, it just made her more anxious. “There aren’t many places to gather so the rec room is always a good bet. The arboretum will be too, once it’s done.”

Yeoman Rand

She nodded. The arboretum sounded nice, but not what she was looking for tonight. In the future she’d have a better feel for how everything worked here and maybe know how to slip into the social fabric of the ship, but she was still new here, still figuring it out. There were no manuals for how to settle into a new place and make friends. You simply had to wade through the initial awkwardness and figure it out.

Twirling her fork, Leah considered the yeoman. “So what brings you here at midnight?”

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand looked down at the PaDDs and back, “Reports. Trying to get them all finished for Captain Asam, so they can be sent back to command with the next data packet. It all has to be formatted correctly and size compressed and all that.” Normally Rand didn’t work in the Galley, she wasn’t much on socializing, but her quarters were too empty and too distracting because of the emptiness. She still couldn’t work in the tiny office of a closet either. She supposed eventually she’d have to deal with that. “What about you? Just a craving for cake?”

Yeoman Rand

Leah twirled the fork in her hand and eyed the cake before slicing through it with a far more stabbing motion than she intended this time. “I’m eating my feelings. It was this or shots of tequila and this was what was available to me.” She wasn’t embarrassed by the admission. After all, even mental health practitioners had their own troubles.

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand wasn’t sure what the appropriate, socially expected response was there. She didn’t mind people sharing their feelings and whatnot with her, but she never seemed to say the right thing. Concern, humor, ignore, respond in kind? It was too many variables and too many branching conversational choices that could happen. It was overwhelming. Why did Randy have to transfer? He always knew what to do, what to say. Why did he have to be gone now along with everything else that was going wrong?

Rand was quiet for a noticeable pause while she tried to decide what to do. “Oh, well, um, I mean Gorshin’s cake certainly is delectable enough to distract.” There was no Star Fleet regulation for this situation. “Are you having trouble settling in?”

Yeoman Rand

There were things that were rough about her new assignment but she was still new and some of that would take more time. “Not exactly.” Leah sighed and set the form down. “Do you get along with your family, Rand?”

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand nodded, a small smile graced her face. “I do. I’m lucky that way.” Unlike Roman. Except he had a family that DID love him. He just couldn’t accept it. “I know a lot of people aren’t so lucky.”

Yeoman Rand

Leah half-snorted and nodded. “I’m glad yours is good. I love my family, but there is a lot that is difficult and today was a good example.” She popped a bite of cake into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. “I want to say it wasn’t always so bad, but it was just that back then my dad was a buffer. Without that… it’s a lot. And you would think being on a starship far away from them would make it easier, but we have subspace comms,” she said with a laugh.

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand shook her head. “Oh it’s not easy.” Her family tried to order her life, to watch out for her, but Randy was that necessary buffer for her. “Subspace is great, but you know… there is always some sort of interference. Especially if you ask the comm officer.”

Yeoman Rand

Her brown eyes glittered. “Hmm, yes, we do have that potential of issues. I’ll have to be aware of that next time my mother or sister calls.”

Hart sipped on her water. “Though I have to say, my abuela is wonderful. She’s back on Earth and I got used to spending so much time with her. It is rather weird to be so on my own,” she mused.

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand nodded, “We will make sure not to have any interference those days.” The Yeoman sipped her tea, “Grandparents are wonderful, very special people.”

Yeoman Rand

“That they are. I have only my maternal grandmother alive still and she’s quite something. What about yours?” she asked. Leah only had loving things to say about Inés Maria Álvarez Ríos, but hovering in the back was the knowledge that if Leah ever needed to go no-contact with her mother, she’d likely lose her grandmother as well. She wasn’t willing to do that, so she continually put up with her mother’s crap. And her sister’s as well. It was truly exhausting at times.

~Leah Hart, NP

“My mother’s parents are still alive, but only my father’s mother is still with us.” She missed Seanair more than anything. He had died when she was younger, and it was her fault he was gone from their lives. It didn’t matter what anyone else said, she would always carry that guilt with her. It was why she tended to be so pushy about Roman’s health. She tried not to be, but if she was honest, she wasn’t going to change and any concern in that area appeared excessive to Roman.

None of this showed on her face. She was far too skilled to let body language give her away. “They are wonderful, and Seanmhair really dotes on me. She’s a quirky lady.”

Yeoman Rand

Leah smirked. “It seems to be something about getting older and having lived a great deal of life. Mine is the same. She used to be a flamenco dancer, actually. It’s where I learned to love dance. I didn’t grow up on Earth, so getting to see her perform when I was younger was a very special occasion.”

~Leah Hart, NP

“Flamenco is beautiful, and the music,” Rand sighed, “is just enchanting. Did you learn?”

Yeoman Rand

Leah nodded slowly, taking a sip of her water to hide the slight flush she could feel on her cheeks. “That I did. Umm, I did classes for thirteen years, actually.” She wasn’t used to talking about her dance history. Mostly these days she just showed off some of her skills when she went out to the clubs with friends. Most knew she had really been into dance but few knew the full extent of it.

~Leah Hart, NP

Rand nodded. Everyone needed a hobby. “My family, we always have music and dancing whenever we get together, but no one was professional.”

Yeoman Rand