Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in Misery and Disquiet

Posted by Captain Rende Asam (Commanding Officer) in Misery and Disquiet

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in Misery and Disquiet
Posted by… suppressed (14) by the Post Ghost! 👻

(snip)
“See you, Rand. Come back soon.” Franks said as she left.

~ Franks

Rende had stayed in sickbay to, well she wasn’t really sure why Kreed had her stay, other than to reinforce that Alden was off duty. She had gone to check on Rand, knowing she was confined to quarters for the most part. The poor girl had looked absolutely sick and unwell when she left sickbay. Rand had not been in Alden’s quarters nor her old Yeoman’s quarters. So she decided to check the mess. Rand still had to eat, and she knew the young woman would never ask anyone to bring food to her.

As she stepped off the lift, what she saw was Rand, darting quickly down the hall, from the biology lab, and toward the mess. Along with Lt Franks telling her to return soon. Rende decided not to call the woman out on it. Instead Rende went back to the bridge for awhile. She would check on Rand later. It was quite possible that Franks had simply asked Rand where Alden was on her way to the mess.

Asam, CO

Rand picked up a late lunch tray. It was depressing. It was her and Roman’s meals. Gorshin was knew they always ate together and had them ready for her. Rand sighed and carried the tray back to their quarters. She wasn’t interested in eating, but it explained why she was down on deck 9. She set the tray down and then let Pipkin out of her cage. Rand sat on the bed. She felt horrible. She knew she was having an anxiety attack. She knew it wasn’t just the medicine either. She wasn’t going back to Sickbay. They were just going to have her lay down and try to distract her. She could lay down in her quarters, alone, just fine. Pipkin climbed onto the bed and hopped and sniffed around and then curled up into a fuzzy little ball on Rand’s chest.

It was some time later that there was a chime at the door. Rand almost ignored it, but no one would come find her to just visit. It had to be important. Pipkin wasn’t budging, and scrambled against her, so Rand picked her up and carried her with her to the door. She had the horrible feeling that it was Lt Kreed with bad news.

Rand

When the door opened, it took Rende only a moment to make the decision to invite herself in. She stepped in, causing Rand to back up and let the door close. She put both hands on Rand’s shoulders and guided her toward the bed and sat down next to her and hugged her. “Oh you poor child. It’s all going to be okay.” Rende hugged her tighter when she tried to pull away. “No no, none of that. We are just two women here. I understand better than you think. I’m married, you know, and you and Alden may not have a certificate yet, but that piece of paper doesn’t change how you feel does it?”

Rand had obviously been crying, and her breathing really wasn’t great. She tried her best not to appear so, but she was too upset to make a thorough showing of a mask.
She was so surprised by the captain’s comfort that she began to cry in earnest. “Nnno.” She sniffed and took a shuddered breath.

She ran a hand over Rand’s arm. “It is cruel to have to watch someone we love struggle so horribly. You don’t have to pretend in here. We are just two regular people. Rank got left out in the corridor, alright?”

Rende

She sat up, cradling Pipkin, and wiped her face. “I’m sorry, Cpt. I guess this is why families don’t serve together.” Rand was beyond embarrassed that the captain was seeing her so upset. She was immediately resigned to the fact that either she or Roman would be transferred after this. Probably herself. He was the XO after all, and the crew looked up to him. First officers didn’t get transferred unless they were promoted or demoted. She hoped that wouldn’t happen to Roman. It would be all her fault if it did, and he would never forgive her.

Rand

“That’s nonsense. Serving together is no more or less troublesome than serving with strangers. If you hadn’t been here, we may never have known Alden was in such trouble” Rende patted her shoulder. “Cargo ships are much more dangerous, and they are nothing but families. And they are very successful. Now,” she reached over and rubbed the rabbits ears, “Who
is this?”

Rende

“Oh,” Rand was distracted by the question “This is Pipkin. She was Roman’s birthday present 2,” was it really that long, “years ago.” Rand rubbed between Pipkin’s ears. “He always wanted an orange Netherland Dwarf growing up. It’s not common to have pets, but it is allowed. She’s very friendly.” She let Pipkin go and the bunny hopped onto the captain’s lap and sniffed her.

Rand

Rende laughed, “You aren’t like Pipkin are you. In Watership Down he was chubby and slow, “but like him, you are very sweet.” Rende laughed at Rand’s expression. “It was one of my son’s favorite stories.”

Rende

“You have a son?” Rand hadn’t read that. She was Sure she would have remembered that detail. She couldn’t imagine leaving her child behind and the captain wasn’t old enough to have a grown child. Not unless she had had him very young. She doubted that she and Roman would ever have children. Officers weren’t prohibited from being pregnant, but they were required to serve on Earth. She wouldn’t want to go through the whole pregnancy and birth without Roman. She really didn’t think she would make a very good mother. She adored children, but she’d be so afraid all the time she’d probably make her children just like herself.

Rand

“Had,”Rende emphasized the word. “He died a long time ago. I like to remember him. Tabris was a very sweet and talented young man. He took after his father. He loved to work with his hands. He was Eldorin’s shadow. They did everything together.” The captain smiled sadly for a moment. “Eldorin and I were lucky. His loss brought us closer together rather than ripping our marriage apart. It was hard though, one of the hardest things we have ever been through. We both went times of great grief and depression. Sometimes separately and sometimes simultaneously. We made it through though. You and Alden will too.”

Rende

Rand nodded but didn’t look convinced. “He won’t forgive me. He might want me around now because I’m familiar, but he won’t forgive me for saying something.” She sighed heavily. “He was doing so well.” She sighed again. “He was doing better, but then Randy left. He didn’t have anyone to make him talk then. It wasn’t ideal Roman having to talk to my brother about it all, but Randy was all we had.”

Yeoman Rand

Rende pet the small rabbit who was very curious for such a small prey animal. “That’s right, you and your brother, your twin, were both stationed here together. That’s rather exceptional. Did you both know Cmdr Alden before that?”

Capt. Rende Asam, Commanding Officer

“N…nno. Actually, I didn’t even know Randy was going to be stationed here. I was on K5 for 2 months before the Sentinel arrived. Randy, well he’s really amazing at what he does, and he helped someone. He was offered any position he wanted. Sentinel didn’t need a NP then, so he came as a yeoman. We didn’t meet Cmdr Alden until three days after we boarded. It was at the lounge on K5. Cpt Carmichael had called all the senior staff to the lounge for a drink or something. Randy and I didn’t know. We were off duty and decided to go to the station before we left; we were just sitting at a table with our drinks.” Rand got this slight grin before hiding it, but Rende could hear the butterflies the memory caused, “I guess he was the last one to arrive. Everyone was standing around looking awkward, waiting for Carmichael to say or do something. Cmdr Alden walked in and right past everyone and sat down like the meeting was his and asked if anyone else was going to sit.”

Lt., j.g. Rand Farquharson, Yeoman First Class

Rende smiled, she could hear, even now, that first rush of attraction in Rand’s voice as she recalled the memory. “He’s very confident and self-assured isn’t he?” He had been a bit uneasy in their first meeting, but Rende could tell he was wary of her, and upset he didn’t get the promotion. She hadn’t taken it personally. She would have felt the same way. “I’ve noticed no matter how hard I try people still hold back with me in favor of going to him.” She held up a hand, “I like it. It shows they have confidence and trust in him. After the history of captain’s Sentinel has had, I am glad they had someone so steadfast.”

Cpt. Asam, CO

Rand sighed, the sound carrying such despair. “He is… or he was. I wish I could help him, but I can’t. I can’t do the therapy for him, I can’t magically change the past. I just…” Rand stopped. “I shouldn’t be talking to you about this. I’m sorry Captain. I promise it won’t affect my work.”

Yeoman Rand

“Rand, that is ridiculous. I know you and Cmdr Alden are very private people. And I am aware that outside of your duty you are not a social butterfly.” She smiled gently at the horrified look in Rand’s face. “It’s okay. You don’t have to be. But you have no one to confide in. To support you through this. Plus, I know you would never tell anyone about this. You would never risk his reputation that way.”

“This is scary and heart breaking. But you ate not just a Yeoman, Rand. You are a person. I am not inconvenienced to know that or to simply be a friend when you need one. You don’t have to pretend all the time. You almost lost the love of your life. It’s alright to talk to me.”

Cpt. Asam, CO

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” There was an odd catch in her voice as she said it. “I mean I know I had to tell Lt Kreed, but I don’t know what to do now. I understand he couldn’t leave us alone, he has protocol to follow, but I couldn’t explain.” Rand sighed defeated. “I wouldn’t matter, Roman hates excuses. Anything I say now he’ll just think is an excuse and it will make him more mad. I can’t apologize, I’m not sorry.”

Yeoman Rand

Rende listened to the discordant notes around her. Rand wasn’t just stressed; she was anxious and nearing a panic attack. She was doing a remarkable job of not showing it though. “Rand, listen, it’s going to be hard on both of you for awhile. The only thing you are supposed to do is take care of yourself.” She held up a hand, “Yes it is. First and foremost because otherwise you can’t help him. And to help him, you are only supposed to be there for him. Don’t give up on him. He might be mad for awhile, but he won’t stay that way. All couples get mad at each other once in awhile. It doesn’t mean anything horrible or world ending. You’ll get through it and have a stronger relationship for it. I promise.”

Cpt. Asam, CO