Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in side - sim: A Secret is a Prison

Posted by Commander Roman Alden (First Officer & Chief Science Officer) in side - sim: A Secret is a Prison

Posted by Ensign Rand Farquharson (Yeoman First Class) in side - sim: A Secret is a Prison
Posted by… suppressed (26) by the Post Ghost! 👻
It had taken Randy a week to get Rand to come out of her quarters without having a mild panic attack. She refused to go by her office, choosing to go the long way around. It had taken another 3 days before Randy convinced her that she had to be able to at least walk past her office. What if there was an emergency, what if the other way down the corridor was blocked for maintenance? Randy argued that Rand couldn’t avoid her duties because of her memories. It had taken both Randy and Roman both to get her to go. Morgan had even come with them. She convinced Randy to let her go with them stating that she was there with Rand and could answer questions about what had happened better than he or Cmdr Alden could. It had taken every bit of self-discipline and acting training for Rand to go and not show how horrible it was for her. Afterwards, it would have been better if she could have slept, but delaying the panic attack hadn’t made it better once she was safely back in her quarters.

She couldn’t work from her office, she couldn’t even bring herself to get anything from the room. Roman did it for her, or she went without. She worked from their quarters, avoiding her office completely.

Rand had been back on duty, finally, for a couple of weeks. Light duty. That meant half day shifts, limited screen time, no lifting at all, and lots of breaks to sit. That meant no running. She missed her morning runs, but Elbbirt would not clear her to start running again. At first it annoyed Rand, then as she realized how tired she was after just morning rounds, she stopped complaining. Her day was split into three hours in the morning and two in the evening. She barely was able to get evening reports done for her hour long meeting with Rogers, but Randy helped with that. Running errands like uniforms or stocking the conference room or the yeoman pantry or butler’s pantry in Rogers’ quarters meant she now had help. Gorshin or Chief Helpful always made sure someone was around to carry things for her. Rand tried to explain the restriction was for lifting not carrying things. And only because she got dizzy standing up from bending down still.

Every evening after her meeting with Rogers, she and Roman would eat so she could sit for a bit, and then he would take her to see Nibbles. She wasn’t able to come during the day. Rand hated to admit she needed a break in the middle of the day, but she did. And Roman couldn’t stay with her and watch her 100% of the time while he was on duty. Nibbles was still steadfastly attempting to climb, and Rand wasn’t sure how to discourage her. Rand didn’t really have the heart to make her stop, but knew she needed to. She ended up having to cup the mouse in both her hands to keep Nibbles in one place. The distraught squeaking and chittering had stopped now that Rand had been around for a few weeks.

Rand

There had been several more episodes of Roman needing his hypo and his inability to take it easy on himself slowed his healing. But he was still getting better. Slowly just doing his job alone stopped making him need it, and now it was only if he really overdid something. Soon, very soon, his restrictions would be lifted. If he would ever go to sickbay, that is.

But his nightmares were worsening as time passed, bringing them further and further through the month of September. It was like it was last year, he was barely sleeping. He was trying to hide it from Rand, he didn’t want her to worry, or stay up with him, he wanted her to heal, especially after they tried to make her go in her office. Randy had to convince him to help with that, he hadn’t wanted to make her.

And the heart and the burns had made his fear of sickbay worse. He would go in there if he had to, as XO, spend as little time there as he could get away with, and then leave. He’d barely look at it if he had to pass the door in the hall. That was something he hadn’t told Rand or Randy about, though Randy did know how his nightmares were. The effect the lack of sleep had on him was hard to miss, and the nightmares and sleep deprivation were bad for his heart.

The nightmares were causing him to skip meals again, too, though whenever he ate with Rand, he tried to eat at least a little, so she wouldn’t worry. That wasn’t particularly good for him and his heart either, and the idea of fainting again loomed over him, but even that couldn’t motivate him not to skip food.

He was still wearing a shirt to bed and changing in the bathroom. The longer he went without telling Rand about the burns, the worse he felt. But now it had been so long he didn’t even know how to bring it up, so he hadn’t. He’d have to tell her eventually. He’d been talking to Randy about that, too.

Roman looked forward to taking Rand to see the animals every day after his shift. It made both of them happy, and it reminded him how they met. He would sit with her and watch her interact with them for as long as she wanted, then they would go up to their quarters and he would ask her all about her day, glad she was able to go back to work even if it was restricted work.

~ Roman

Randy encouraged Roman to tell Rand. She was well enough to handle it now that she was back at work. The longer he kept the secret the worse it would get when it was discovered. He knew the nightmares were getting worse without Roman saying. He was surprised Rand hadn’t noticed herself. That nagged at Randy some, but he didn’t say anything to Rand because that would violate Roman’s privacy. He also pushed Roman to say something about them to Rand. She’d helped him through things last year, and there was no good reason to hide that from her. She knew about them. Randy also stressed to Roman he didn’t have to deal with them alone. He wouldn’t want Rand to hide it from him. But in the end Randy couldn’t make Roman say anything.

Roman told him he didn’t want her to worry, to stay up because he was. He hated when she woke up. She needed her sleep. He wouldn’t want her to hide it from him, but this was different. (It wasn’t, really, he was just rationalizing.) With the burns… she was going to be mad and he knew it, and that was a bad reason to keep it from her, but… he was being a chicken about it, and he knew that too, but he still couldn’t make himself do it.

Randy told him he was making excuses. This was not different. Rand might be hurt that he didn’t tell her, but if he went ahead and told her himself and explained she would listen and understand. BUT if she ever found out on her own she’d be mad in a way Roman didn’t want to see. Of course Randy would rather her be mad than the alternative.

Roman promised to tell her. Said he was planning on it. But hadn’t worked up the guts to do it yet. He hoped she didn’t find out about it on her own. He knew that would be worse than him telling her.

Life was returning to normal, to an extent. Rand was getting up early, even though she didn’t go for a run. She took her time getting ready and moving through her morning. She preferred that to sleeping later and then rushing. On her days off, thought if asked she felt she’d had enough days off, she went for long walks, she couldn’t run, but she could stretch and move. She didn’t join Roman for breakfast anymore, instead they ate something small before she left. She’d tried the first few days, but she’d gotten behind, rushed, and made her self dizzy and confused. For a very few loooong minutes she’d thought she was lost. She hadn’t told Roman or Randy about that, not wanting them to worry.

Some days they had lunch together. Now that she wasn’t confined to their quarters Roman didn’t come up to eat with her as often. It bothered her at first, until she reminded herself that Roman was behind in his work too. The truth, that Roman was avoiding eating because of his nightmares hadn’t registered with her yet. She was also dozing still in these early weeks from returning to work, so she missed lunch as well. The evenings were the best part of her day. Getting to talk with Roman about their days, their work, the animals, or now they could even watch movies again.

Roman was behind, and he missed having lunch with Rand all the time, but it also made a handy excuse to skip lunch. Then he’d tell her he ate, at his desk.... All this lying was becoming a slippery slope. The same went for breakfast. He could eat something little with her, before she left, or if he left with or before her, sometimes he could get away with not at all. Dinner was the hardest to dodge, they almost always ate together. He’d usually try to eat a little, but sometimes, he just pushed the food around.

Rand knew he was lying about eating at his desk. Roman had a strict policy of no food in the lab. The only time he’d broken that rule was when Carmichael had left and Roman was pulling double and triple duty. She knew he was actually working through lunch, but telling her he ate so she wouldn’t worry. Also Scott would have spread that gossip of Alden’s double standard like wild fire. She wished he would just say so, but she knew Roman didn’t want her to worry. She really couldn’t say much since she was napping through lunch herself.

Something was bothering her though, in the reports. Roman’s seemed…off some how. They didn’t seem the same. At first she just thought it was from not working so long and it taking longer to do the work. But it kept nagging at her. It was frustrating and made her feel something was wrong. She couldn’t put her finger on it. She became angry at herself because details didn’t come so easy anymore, like they did before. They were little errors in the reports, and she’d seen them before she just couldn’t pin point where or why. It wasn’t anything major but it seemed important. Randy and Elbbirt had told her that her memory was getting better and she’d need time. She was impatient. When was her next appointment?

That’s when she saw it. She had one at the end of the week, but Roman was supposed to have his final assessment for his heart a week ago. He never went. Or if he did he didn’t tell her or ask her to go with him. It was an easy enough thing to search the records to see if he went - he did not. Rand knew he hated it, but he needed to do this. It was also a simple search to see that he had no major experiments or tests or meetings scheduled for the end of the week. She talked to Randy and they set it up.

At the end of the week, when they got up, Rand broached the subject. “I have another assessment today. Can you go with me?”

Rand

Roman was getting ready for work. His final assessment was a week ago, and he figured Randy would come after him about it eventually, but Randy hadn’t, so Roman just silently stressed about it. But he didn’t expect Rand to set him up, so when she asked him to go to hers, he nodded. Like always, he’d brave Sickbay for her. He wouldn’t like it, but he’d do it. “What time? I’ll be there.” Then he stressed about going with her all day. He’d rather not step foot in Sickbay at all, but he’d do it for her.

~ Roman

“1030 hours.” When the time came Rand waited for Roman before going into Sickbay. She was wringing her hands. She really was nervous. She hated these assessments. She didn’t want to be there at all, and she was feeling guilty about asking Roman to be somewhere he hated so much.

Randy was waiting for them. After he had Rand sit down he pulled a chair over for Roman. “We’re going to do the cognitive tests first and then go to the gym for a physical assessment. It’s safer there with all the mats.” Randy started the biobed running the medical scans. Then he pulled the computer screen over and insert a disk. “Alright, you know how this goes. Press the control when you’re ready.” Rand hated these tests. She always felt like she was getting worse.

Rand

Roman was on time to be with her. When he saw her wringing her hands and otherwise being nervous he hugged her. “It’ll be fine.” He said to her. During the tests, he sat down by her and and held her hand when he could. He was still under the impression the appointment was just for her. He hesitated walking into sickbay, and then tried his best to not look as nervous as he was sitting with her. He tried to keep his focus on her. That was the only thing that helped.

~ Roman

She hated the questions, she hated how hard some answers were. She also hates how easy some came only to be wrong, but that hadn’t happened in awhile. When the answers didn’t come easy, she squeezed his hand nervously. The bed showed her heart and respiration go up each time, more so if she ran out of time to provide an answer. Randy squeezed her other hand a moment. “Deep breaths, Rand. Relax don’t fight with yourself.”

Roman squeezed her hand gently and put his other hand on her shoulder. “You’re doing fine. You’ll get more of them right if you try to relax.”

Elbbirt came in as she was finishing, and saved Randy from having to broach the subject of Roman’s test. “Cmdr Alden. You’re here. Finally. I thought I would have to go find you. Don’t get up, just stay there and I’ll grab a tricorder.” Which he did, and pulled out the wand. “If we hadn’t been so busy I would have already.”

Roman froze at the sound of Elbbirt’s voice, his grip on Rand’s hand tightening considerably. “Go find me? What for? I’m not here for me, I’m here for her.” And he gestured tensely to Rand.

Elbbirt nodded, “Yes I know, but since you are a week late for your evaluation, and you are here, let’s get it over with.” Elbbirt was well aware of Alden’s adverse feelings toward Sickbay, but since he was here Elbbirt would make the most of it.

Roman was prevented from getting up by Rand’s death grip. She’d failed to answer a second question in a row.

Rand

He tried to stand from his spot, to shy away from the tricorder but Rand’s grip was too tight. He’d have to let her hand go and he wouldn’t do that. “I’m doing fine, I don’t need any tests.” Rand and Randy would both recognize how uncomfortable and stressed he sounded.

~ Roman

Rand had forgotten in her anxiety about arranging for Roman’s eval while she had her appointment. The sound of strain in his voice pulled her away from her own tests. She looked up at him and then at Elbbirt. Oh. She tugged his hand and tried to look reassuring. “Of course you’re fine.” The computer beeped, a time warning. She got flustered and Randy reached over and paused it. “Didn’t you say you need to be back on full duty?” She looked at Elbbirt, “Won’t this take care of that? Then he’ll be done?”

Roman’s chest tightened down in anxiety and panic so quickly and so hard he coughed lightly and had to make himself breathe. “No, I… It’s fine the way it is…” It was difficult to hide the strain in his voice when he could barely get the words out. His focus had narrowed and he hadn’t heard the computer’s time warning or seen Rand get flustered because of it. His grip on her hand was tight, his palm clammy and sweaty.

Elbbirt nodded, still quietly taking his scans. “Oh yes. Once this is done, the Cmdr can go back to full duty. Unless there is some problem we haven’t been told about.” Rand smiled and shook her head. “He seems fine to me.” He had even carried her a few weeks ago when she…she’d… panicked. She turned back to the computer, looking more at her lap and suddenly was squeezing the bones in Roman’s hands. She didn’t want to remember.

Rand

Elbbirt’s scans showed his heart was doing well, even under the stress he was now under. But there was that permanent damage they hadn’t been able to heal that would always be there, he would always have to watch when exercising for concerning symptoms. It also made future heart problems more likely for him. If Elbbirt took the right scans for it, he’d also see the effects of Roman’s poor eating and sleeping habits of late, putting strain on his heart and the rest of his body.

Elbbirt was running a full physical scan so he saw the results and his puzzles look drew Randy’s attention. Randy stepped around and looked at the scans. The two had been working together long enough that a simple look and a nod from Randy told Elbbirt that he was aware and it fell under Randy’s expertise. Elbbirt made note of the scan but left the details in Randy’s capable hands. The evaluation was mostly complete. The sudden panic Alden was experiencing was better than a standard stress test. Elbbirt would like to get scans while Roman worked out, but that wasn’t necessary.

Roman had been lucky he hadn’t needed his hypo then. Lifting her was too much for him at the time and he’d felt it for sure. But he hadn’t passed out, and his heart had been able to recover on its own, without medical support. “I’m fine. I just need to go…” He tried to stand again, but Rand was squeezing his hand again, hard. His chest was still tightened down so much it was difficult to force breaths let alone speak. He looked at her. “Rand..?”

~ Roman

Rand looked up at him. She looked confused but really she was just lost. She couldn’t remember exactly what she did to keep him calm. She tried to remember. She was trying to answer the questions, she had accidently hit the key and started the test again. The timer was counting down. She entered an answer just so it wouldn’t be blank. She would hug him and breathe with him, whisper to him. But he would come closer and she has to stay on the bed while it finished her scans and she had to finish her test. She entered another answer. He was pulling away. “Ròmanach, feumaidh tu seo. Mura tèid thu seachad, faodaidh an t-òrdugh leigeil ma sgaoil meidigeach a thoirt dhut. (Roman, you need this. If you don’t pass, command may give you a medical discharge.)” But he wanted to leave, he needed to, and Rand didn’t want to make him stay. Elbbirt had put the tricorder away, and she let go of his hand, so he could leave. She understood he needed to leave, that he could not stay. The computer trilled, showing a failed score.

Rand

Roman was too distracted to fully understand what she said. The ‘you need this’ part, he got. Her voice and her words seemed to help a little, understood or not. She let go of his hand but he didn’t let go of hers. He kept a tight grip. He wanted to leave but he couldn’t leave her. Then the sound of the computer caught his attention and he saw her failed score. He felt terrible. Maybe he should go, he was distracting her with this ridiculous problem. But she was nervous, she wanted him there. She always wanted him there. So he clamped his hand onto hers and kept his seat looking like he was doing all he could to stay.

~ Roman

When he clamped onto her hand she wrapped her fingers around his. She didn’t want him to go. This had gotten out of hand very quickly. She just wanted Roman to be dones with this. She wasn’t paying attention to the computer. She wanted to help him, she was supposed to want him to go. To put him before herself.

Roman felt terrible. Rand was scared because he was. If he could just control himself better, he could help her. The more stressed he was the harder it was to focus, to not get lost in… in memories. Every biobed, empty or not, had… things he did not want to see, or deal with, on them for a split second. Like when he had the flashback that relapsed his heart, he blamed himself. He should be able to handle this problem, but he couldn’t.

Elbbirt looked at the screen. He would have redo the test later. “Randy, take Rand up to the gym, and I will be there in a moment.” He needed to check the log of hypos for Alden before he could sign off on his medical release. Randy kept impeccable logs and so it was a simple review to see that Alden did use it, but less frequently and the circumstances were increasing in strain before he needed it and the scans showed no further damage or struggle. Elbbirt signed off and would find Alden later to tell him. Maybe a message to his computer would be better.

Randy moved the computer and took Rand’s other hand. “Come on, let’s go up to the gym. You’re almost done.”

Rand felt a lot of guilt and her stomach felt funny in a bad way. “You don’t have to come. You probably need to go back to the lab.” The words were really quiet so he may not hear her. Randy was exhausted. He felt bad for both of them, but these evals had to be done. And it hurt to see Rand so....afraid.

Rand

Roman shook his head stiffly. “I’m coming.” He said, equally softly, giving her hand a little tense squeeze. “I won’t make you do this alone.” She wouldn’t leave him, he couldn’t do that to her. He had to be able to do this. As they left sickbay he relaxed a little but still stiff and stressed.

~ Roman

Randy led them to the lift and up a deck to the gym. He took Rand over to a treadmill. “Alright we’re just going to start with a slow walk, and build up the speed. See how your equilibrium and head manage the pace. No running yet.” He set the machine for a slow pace to increase the pace every two minutes.

Rand stepped onto the machine, holding the side rails as the track began to move, slowly at first which was good because it took a minute to find the rhythm and traction on the machine.

Randy stood back and next to Roman as they watched. “You could get on the treadmill next to her. She always liked running with you. It’s not quite the same, but it might help. Besides she knows she’s the faster runner. If you pace beside her she might not try so hard to over push herself.”. Randy was not trying to get more readings on Roman, but to distract him from the memories and get him to focus on something else. And physical movement was a good way to ground the mind in the here and now.

Randy

Roman shook his head at first, he’d been made to walk and then run like that after his leg… but running with Rand was different and if it would help her… He did not even consider the idea that they might try to get readings on him while exercising. He nodded, slowly, and stepped onto the treadmill next to Rand. “If I run too, then it’s like our morning runs,” he commented to her as he matched her pace.

~ Roman

Rand smiled, it seemed hesitant. The pace out slow but was starting to increase. No running, Randy really didn’t think she was ready for that. Elbbirt arrived to observe and scan. Rand seemed okay but she was holding on to the railing awefully tight. After several minutes, she looked at Roman again, and slowed her pace to match his. Truthfully he was in better shape than she was right now, but habit made her adjust and after a couple of more minutes Rand’s readings leveled out. As Randy had predicted she wasn’t pushing so hard. “I miss running with you.” It seemed like it had been forever.

“I miss running with you, too,” Roman replied. He offered a little smile. “It won’t be long before you can run again.” It was an easy pace for him, he was more than well enough for it. If they’d made him do the physical portion of his test they’d have made him go faster.

She nodded but the smile wasn’t convincing. It would be quite awhile. The longer she had to put it off, the more out of shape and practice she became. After her fall in the gym she doubted anyone would clear her to run for awhile.

The pace finally stopped increasing at a pace for speed walkers, not running but moving quickly. Rand had been starting to struggle earlier, but pushed it. Elbbirt called a halt when she stumbled on the moving track. Randy grabbed her and turned the machine off. “Cmdr could you walk her around the edge a moment? Just let her get her feet back under her,” Elbbirt asked.

Rand

Roman reached for her when she stumbled but she was okay and then Randy had her. He nodded when Elbbirt asked him to take her around the edge of the gym. The good news was Randy’s idea seemed to have worked. Roman seemed more relaxed than before as he worked his way around with Rand.

~ Roman

Rand tried to walk on her own, but the more she pushed the more she seemed to stumble. It was like her feet couldn’t quite figure out how to walk in solid ground after the movement of the treadmill. She didn’t want to admit she couldn’t do it in her own, everyone would worry. They would take her off duty again.

Roman worried more about her stumbling than he would if she asked for help. After the first couple of times he reached to help her. “Let me help. I don’t want you to fall.”

Elbbirt and Randy were watching. Elbbirt shook his head. “I don’t like it, but what I like less is she won’t ask for help. It’s not about doing it alone, but having the presence of mind to know and ask for help. The be self aware.” Randy nodded. “I know Elbbirt, but my sister is a special kind of stubborn.” Elbbirt snorted, “Well they make a pair don’t they.”

Rand

Roman was still trying to help Rand. They were too far away from Randy and Elbbirt to hear them, thankfully for them. Roman would stubbornly argue that he was not stubborn.

~ Roman

Rand was being stubborn trying to do it on her own, but when the floor swam and her head suddenly started throbbing sharply she stopped pushing herself and let Roman put his arm around her. She stopped completely after two more steps. “I can’t.” She leaned on him until the throbbing stopped making her vision tunnel and then started walking again. Elbbirt had her walk until the slight over dilation of her eyes returned to normal and her BP dropped. It wasn’t overly high, but once it dropped meant her head would stop throbbing so much.

Roman gave her the same arguments she always gave him, that she needed the help, that she didn’t need to strain herself doing it on her own. Finally she let him help, but it didn’t last and she ended up leaning on him. He hugged her and waited with her.

After that Elbbirt had her doing all kinds of balance activities and lifting and carrying different amounts of weight. She did okay carrying things, but bending over or kneeling to lift and then standing was problematic and she got dizzy. The balance activities were a struggle and she needed a lot of help. Randy was truly scared she would fall and get hurt. It was a long evaluation and after an hour, Rand felt bad keeping Roman away from the lab. When Elbbirt had her take break, she said something to Roman. “I didn’t know it would take so long. You don’t have to stay.”

Rand

Roman waited for her to finish her evaluation. He couldn’t be right with her for most of it, but he knew it helped for him to at least be in the room. When Rand told him he didn’t have to stay, he shook his head. “You wouldn’t leave me. It’s fine. It wasn’t a busy day today anyway.” Rand knew that, of course, not that Roman knew she’d scheduled it on purpose. “I’m staying here,” he said, setting a hand against her arm.

~ Roman

Rand smiled and squeezed his hand, “Thank you.” The evaluation lasted another hour. By the end Rand was tired and shaky, she was so out of shape, and dizzy from a mild headache. Not nearly as bad as it had been. When Elbbirt let her stop she sat on the mat gratefully while she waited. She felt really guilty about forcing Roman into the eval. It wasn’t supposed to be that way. She wrung her hands nervously. When she saw Randy and Elbbirt talking about both of them she felt even more guilty. She knew Roman would be upset, but the guilt was too much and she blurted out staring at her hands. “Roman, I’m sorry. I didn’t know Elbbirt was just do that. I knew you had missed your eval and how much you hate it, so I asked Randy to block out extra time. We were going to ask you to just try to do it since we were there. We weren’t going to…well do it like Elbbirt did. I thought it might be easier since I was there too. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want you to be thinking about it all day. I’m really sorry, I shouldn’t have. I know you’re mad.”

Rand

Roman stayed for the entire hour. He was with her when he could be, when she was doing something he couldn’t be with her for, he was sitting nearby watching her. Finally she was done. SHe looked nervous, but Roman didn’t know why, he figured it was just the test results. He saw Randy and Elbbirt, off to the side, talking about her. Then she blurted that out, and it did two things, made him feel even guiltier for not telling her he was shot, and while he was upset she did it, she’d done it for him. She hadn’t known Elbbirt would corner him and freak him out like that. He went over to her and hugged her, shaking his head. “I’m… I’m not angry. I don’t love that you did it, but… you were trying to help.” He sighed against her and shook his head. “I’ve been stressed about it all week… and didn’t say anything to you because I didn’t want you to worry about it.”

~ Roman

He wasn’t angry, but he wasn’t happy. She supposed it was similar to how she felt about Roman having Randy give her meds for the nightmares. She hugged him back, “I worry anyway.” The truth was she had been worried about him but hadn’t been worried about the appt because she either hadn’t known about it or had forgotten. “I’m still sorry.”

Roman smiled and then sighed, “I just don’t want to worry you.” It was the reason he was hiding so much from her, and hiding it was driving him crazy.

Elbbirt and Randy finally came over. “Well, Cmdr, you’ll be happy to know I’ve cleared you of all medical restrictions. Just continue to pay attention and use your hypo if you need it. Let Randy know if you need another.” Then he looked at Rand who looked so nervous he wanted to hug her. “Don’t worry Rand. You get to stay at work, but I’m not lifting any restrictions, yet.” Then he left. Rand sighed, her shoulders slumping. At least Elbbirt didn’t take her off duty, but she should have done better.

Roman nodded, he was happy about that despite his fear of the assessment. It was relieving, he didn’t have to worry they would find something or he’d get stuck in sickbay, or… whatever other strange worry his mind could come up with. Roman hugged her. “At least you’re not off duty. You’ll get better. You have to give it time.” It was another thing Rand had said countless times to him. Especially about his heart, when he was frustrated with what he could and couldn’t do.

Rand nodded. Time, just time. She knew that, better than Roman or Randy. Just like then she was impatient. Rand took a deep breath that Ran could feel with his arm around her. She had pushed too hard then and ended up back in the hospital. “I don’t want to be in the hospital again.”

Randy moved away but didn’t leave. He did not want to intrude, but Rand looked, well, like she should have help. Incase Roman needed to go right back to the lab, he wanted to be on hand to help her.

Rand

Roman was still hugging Rand. “Do you want me to walk you back to our quarters?” He did need to get back to work, in fact with how long he’d been gone, he’d probably need to work late. Besides missing out on time with Rand, it wasn’t exactly unwelcome. It was a perfect excuse to avoid other things that were bothering him.

~ Roman

Rand smiled gently and squeezed his arm. “I do, always, but you’ve been gone awhile. And…” She wanted him to go with her, but she was okay if he couldn’t. She also knew if he did she wouldn’t want him to go because of how she was feeling. She needed to take care of herself, take time. She gave a little nod to herself. “I think I am going to lay down. Right now, I don’t think I feel up to going to the lab today. I am going to ask Randy to take my shift tonight.”

Rand

Roman nodded. “Okay. Do you need me to stay with you?” She was going to ask Randy to cover her shift and she wasn’t going to the lab? She loved going to the lab! But as worried as he was he didn’t want her to feel bad. He was glad she was taking it easy. “Let me walk up with you at least.” He had to get back after that, but he could at least walk her up, especially after she wore herself out with the tests.

~ Roman

The truth was that right then she didn’t feel well and she knew she couldn’t work, and she was too tired to handle the animals. She had to make safe decisions not just do what she wanted. In a few hours she might feel better, but Roman said time and right now that sounded like a good idea. She would love for him to stay with her. “Okay.”

She needed help standing, and she walked slowly, but she was steady on her feet…mostly.

Rand

Roman walked her back up to their quarters. On the way, he grinned at her and said, “No medical restrictions… That means I can carry you whenever I like.” Back up in their quarters he sat with her on the bed for a few minutes. “I need to go back to the lab now,” he said with a sigh. He’d stay if he could but he’d already put off hours of work.

~ Roman