Posted by Ensign Iyun Riani (Scientist) in SB 157 Arboretum

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Ever Zeanar (Chief of Psychiatry) in SB 157 Arboretum

Posted by Ensign Iyun Riani (Scientist) in SB 157 Arboretum
Posted by… suppressed (3) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Tears flowed freely, soaked up by the roots of the rainbow of flowers growing towards the unnatural lighting of the arboretum. On Bajor, Ever had spent many afternoons in a park near her office. Gardens, rolling hills of grass, seemed to draw people together, spreading their wings in sunlight, free from the constraints of buildings. On starships and bases, this was as close to a park that could be naturally created and as such, drew visitors. Ever became aware that a small child had noticed her distress. Licking an ice cream that had melted onto her clothing and smeared across her face, the child furrowed her lips and brow. Children had their own emphatic abilities and were often over sensitive to other’s pain and suffering. Managing a weak smile, Ever nodded to the child and moved away, praying silently to the four deities she would never have the burden of one of those creatures. Goddess did she hate children. 

Ever was not the only one looking for refuge in the Arboretum just then. Not far from her a petite figure was sitting half hidden behind a rhododendron in full bloom. An ordinary observer would notice that she was dressed in long, light blue skirt and a white blouse (OOC: think Victorian walking skirt and a blouse that matches the era). Her long dark brown hair was pulled back in a French braid, that - in her sitting position - touched the ground. Her head was bowed as if in prayer or thought, so that her Bajoran earring lightly brushed her cheek. Yet anyone who paid closer attention, might notice that her breathing was fairly shallow and that she was ever so slightly fiddling with the fabric of her skirt. It seemed that she was oblivious to what was going on around her. Anyone paying closer attention to her might also notice that she looked fairly young.

Scanning the plants quickly, Ever spotted what she had come to see. Stopping in front of the lilac bulbs, she laid her hand gently underneath and bent her head to take in the sweet fragrance. The walls and glass of the green house melted away, transporting her back to Bajor. Pink dragonflies circled around her head, some landing in the curls of her long black hair. Closing her eyes more tightly, draining the last of unwanted tears, Ever could imagine a familiar, yet lost, figure emerging from the twilight, moving  slowly towards her. 

Lt Commander Ever Zeanar, CoP (Incoming)

It wasn’t till Ever moved closer towards her, that the young woman looked up and turned her head towards her. She wondered who the other woman was. Yet timid as she always was, Riani didn’t dare to approach her. Instead she found herself subconsciously shift her position and stare at the woman, wondering who she was. She couldn’t even say why she was so fascinated by her. After all, it wasn’t the first time she saw some one in a park or this case arboretum walk around and smell flowers. But it wasn’t long till she realised what she was doing and that it was highly inappropriate to stare at someone. So she quickly turned her head and attempted to move to a point behind the rhododendron where she could neither see the other woman nor be seen by her. However, in her rush to crawl away she managed to forget about her long skirt and to pay attention to where it was, leading to her toppling sideways with a soft squeal and lading in the rhododendron.

~Ensign Iyun, Scientist

To the Betazoid, the young Bajorian woman was basically standing next to her screaming directly into her ear “look at me”. Ever withdrew from the memory she had no business revisiting or obsessing over after so many years. Moments long gone, still present  like another heart beat only added to the pain of loss. Glancing down to the young woman laying in a sea of lace and frills, Ever thought she looked more like someone who had walked straight out of a romance holo novel than a science officer.  Of course Ever had recognised Iyun immediately as being one of her “special” cases from the crew manifest and psychology records. Given the officer’s record, Ever wasn’t even mildly surprised to find the woman in this predicament. Amused, but not surprised. The rhododendrons, however were not amused.  And neither would  whoever was responsible for caring for the arboretum. 

Never one to pass up the opportunity to rescue a damsel in distress, Ever held out her hand. “Might try smiling at a stranger next time instead of staring and stalking. Less creepy. “

Her cheeks were by now a brilliant scarlet and Ria wished for nothing more than the ground to open underneath her and swallow her. However, as that was very unlikely to happen, she bashfully stuttered, “I- I’m s-sorry.” She then reached hesitantly for Ever’s hand and let herself be helped back to her feet.

“Come on. We need to get out of here before you get caught destroying the gardens. That will get you a life ban. Trust me. I know,” Ever grinned and walked towards the exit. She had dressed casually in light coloured trouser and a free flowing no frills blouse. The garments hung loosely and were not flattering to her figure, but were comfortable. Today had not been a day she had planned on meeting any of the crew, but rather, just enjoying the last of her leave time. “I am Ever Zeanar. The Ogawa’s new head shrink, by the way. Just to make you a little more nervous.” 

Lt. Commander Zeanar, (CoP, Incoming)

Looking down at the rhododendron, the young woman’s face turned - if that was even possible - even more scarlet. For a couple of moments Ria remained rooted to the spot after Ever had started walking away. Shifting her gaze between the other woman and the rhododendron a couple of times, she tried to decide what to do. Eventually she slightly lifted her long skirt and hurried after Ever. “Shouldn’t I own up to what I did? It’s not right to lie. Even if it’s just by omission,” she asked timidly. “I can’t just pretend as if nothing has happened.” A deep frown had appeared on her forehead. She was confused and also started to get really anxious once again. Looking around, she continued, “I should find someone who takes care of the arboretum and report to them what happened. Maybe I can help them taking care of the plant or the arboretum in general as penance.” She was starting ramble and she was aware of that but seem able to stop herself. In her anxiety it also didn’t seem to register that Ever had introduced herself nor that she was the new Chief of Psychiatry.

~Ensign Iyun, Scientist

How many sleepless nights had this poor woman endured asking herself if she had done the right thing? Had she been enough, good enough? And found all the worrying had not emptied any sorrow, but rather taken her strength and self worth. Anxiety was a terrible thief, stealing joy, happiness and peace. No amount of price could ever pay anxiety’s purchase. Ever declared silently and through a smile that extended to the edge of her eyes, she would help Ensign Iyun to find a way to conquer this burden, to learn to breath.....breath and live.

“Ensign. This venture has caused you no end of grief. Staying will not ease your conscience, but increase your shame and guilt. Leaving will cause your anxiety to grow too large. Yet you alone are responsible for the consequences of your mind. Notice I said mind, not actions. Master it or live with the storm,” Ever said as she paused a few feet from the exit. The flowers were in a shamble. But probably no worse for wear than any afternoon were children played. “I am thirsty and in need of a drink. Come or stay. Your choice.”

Lt Commander Ever Zeanar (CoP)

For a few more seconds, Riani just stood there and stared at Ever. What should she do? If her mind would just stop spinning for a moment so she’d be able to think straight! In the end she took a deep breath and followed Ever. After all, she could always come back later and tell the gardener what happened. It would be even more awkward then, but she felt like she should go with the other woman. Once she caught up with her, she said softly, “I’m sorry. I …” Her voice trailed of and she shook her head. Why was it that she kept leaving people with probably awful first impressions of herself all the time?

~Ensign Iyun, Scientist

“You are sorry for what Ensign?” Ever said glancing sideways for a brief second. Breathing stopped momentarily as  she exited the arboretum as the cooler air of the starbase mixed with humid dry air of the greenhouse. Catching hold of the closest bulkhead, she leaned, bending her arm at the elbow, closing her eyes. Deep within her chest, lungs constricted, heart and pulse raced competing to an invisible finish line. Small beads of perspiration pushed through the pores of skin above her lip and eyebrow. Some stories never had a resolution. Stifling darkness, suffocating not just her body, but soul. Craving to scream and out shout the voices, sounds and smells that lived only in her head, Ever pushed back before the darkness could pull her in and drown what remained of her spirit. Denial always came with massive repercussions. Twilight would come. Not now. Not today. Opening her eyes, she was once again standing outside the arboretum. Riani’s thoughts and feeling pressed and weighed in, dismissing and replacing old nightmares. The poor girl’s mind never seemed to stay still, always running from one thought to the next. No wonder she was filled with worry. This intrusion was welcomed and gave Ever somewhere else to focus.   

“Don’t worry about the plants. I know the gardener. I will get it sorted out for you, I promise.” Ever didn’t explain any more as she started moving once again down the corridor. “What makes you think I have an awful impression of you? Or that I was even thinking about you for that matter?”

Ever increased the speed of her steps. filling her energy return to normal. Taking turns and corridors that seemed in a random pattern, one hall looking the same as the next, seeming to go in a circle. However, their paths never crossed with the arboretum again. Finally, Ever stopped outside a door that had only the number 224 on it, like any other guests quarters on the starbase. Waving her hand across the security panel. Ever waited patiently for the door to open and then stepped through. 

As the lights flickered and came to life, the quarters were indeed standard. Neatly stacked in the far corner were four medium sized crates which held all of Ever’s worldly possessions. Nearly half were clothes and shoes. Goddesses she loved shoes. Nothing save the cylinder brought from OED, held any interest to an outsider. No souvenirs. Crossing the room, Ever kicked off her shoes and sat on the only couch in the room. As she poured a  glass of water from a tall thin blue beaker, she glanced at Riani as though she suddenly remembered she was not alone. After pouring a second glass, she held one out to her guest. “Andorian. Much better than the water on Bajor any day.” 

Lt Commander Zeanar, CoP