“Computer, load up Unreal Desperate Housewives of Betazed (DHoB for short) Season 4 Episode 3 The Housewives Do Risa and play,” Kenzie ordered as she laid on her bed, resting her padd on her upper legs.

The holovid began to play in front of her, the introduction and the theme song, the theme from seasons 1-3 was much better, this new composer, a half Pakled-half Klingon really had no idea about music in Kenzie’s opinion, but who was she to complain? The theme song for DHoB meant that she got her fix of DHoB, and better a bad DHoB theme song followed by DHoB than no theme song and no DHoB.

It started with Delina in the booth, telling the audience that she and the gals were going to Risa on account of her having acquired tickets for all of them to the planet and she hoped they all appreciated that she was letting them go with her, especially Lwineria who had accused her in the previous episode of having impure thoughts when it came to Lwineria’s husband. That was, of course, a violation of the agreement that they would not use their telepathy to read the minds of each other. She respected him as a colleague, nothing more.

Then the shot changed to all of the Unreal Desperate Housewives together on Betazed in Ralindia’s condo. Ralindia was depressed, there was nothing new in that, thought Kenzie as she watched. Ralindia’s husband had gone missing in the previous season’s finale, and despite the evidence that he was, in fact, dead, she refused to believe it, instead believing he was hiding from her in some cruel kind of hoax and that he was somehow hiding his thoughts from her as well.

Calonixia, the youngest of the housewives, and as empty headed as a Pakled, was complaining loudly to anyone who would listen that she had broken a nail and that she had no idea that being pregnant would take so long.

Horinisa, the matriarch of the group, looked at Calonixia with utter contempt on her face, and commented, “dear, perhaps you should have understood the process before you had sex, just a thought.”

“You would know all about that, you old bat,” Calonixia replied, glaring daggers at the older Betazed woman. Those two were always at each others throats, it was one of the things that Kenzie loved most about this show.

Mr. Xero, Horinisa’s valet and butler, entered the camera shot, silent as always and distributed drinks to the ladies. That seemed to calm them down.

Delina came into the shot at that point and said “ladies, your attention please, pack your swimsuits, your sunhats and your little black dresses, we are off to Risa. I have got us all tickets for a week long vacation to the pleasure planet.”

With much whooping from among her fellow Unreal Desperate Housewives of Betazed, they went to advertisements …

-Kenzie East
OOC: You know … I just had to don’t you. :P