Posted by Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk (Chief Engineer/Containment Architect) in Away Team Psychological Evaluations: Tag Henao

Posted by Lieutenant Laural Corynn Witley, Ph.D., M.D. (Counselor) in Away Team Psychological Evaluations: Tag Henao

Posted by Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk (Chief Engineer/Containment Architect) in Away Team Psychological Evaluations: Tag Henao
Posted by… suppressed (27) by the Post Ghost! 👻
With every medical clearance of the away team, Laural was notified. Serving as a medical officer herself, she could appreciate the ease with which medical clearances could be done. Not only could simple scans identify acute and impending injuries or illnesses, but people were far more likely to cooperate. After all, symptoms like physical pain or extreme fatigue could be just disruptive enough not to be easily ignored. On top of that, it was hard to justify the avoidance of a process that could take as little as 30 seconds.

Identifying psychological changes, on the other hand, could not be so easily identified or addressed. Psychic pain, if acknowledged at all, could be suppressed for years, even though it could be even more destructive over time because the sufferer could take it out on others.

All this Laural understood even as she acknowledged some would always seek to if not avoid the post away team psychological evaluation, at least delay it.

That was why Laural was persistent.

~Doctor Laural Witley, Counselor

Iphigenia entered the waiting area of the Counseling Suite, her mind full with thoughts about the mission they had just returned from. She couldn’t shake off the images of the desolate planet they had explored, nor the tension that had simmered among the crew during their time there. Despite her efforts to focus on the present, her thoughts kept drifting back to that eerie landscape, their terrifying inhabitants, and the eerie feeling it had left her with.

Iphigenia gave a nod of acknowledgment to a few officers she passed by as she made her way towards Doctor Witley’s office. The area was busy with activity, various officers attending to various tasks with focused efficiency. Iphigenia’s steps were slow as she approached Doctor Witley’s office. There was a slight hesitation before she reached out to press the chime. It was a small moment, barely noticeable to an outsider, but to her, it was a brief pause to collect her thoughts before stepping into the next phase of the post-mission routine. With the chime activated, she stood there, waiting patiently for the invitation to enter.

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

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“Come in,” Laural called out. She was expecting members of the away team to come by, having cleared her calendar until everyone had been seen to, but she had not asked to see specific people or anyone in a particular order, so when the door hissed open, she was surprised to see the Captain as her first customer, so to speak. Wit realized she should not have been, however, as Henao had always struck Laural as someone who took particular pride in leading the way, for things big and small.

Wit smiled. “Captain, it’s good to see you. Please, come in and make yourself comfortable. I’m glad to see you setting the proper example.”

~Dr. Laural Witley, Counselor

Iphigenia stepped into Doctor Witley’s office, her gaze briefly scanning the familiar surroundings before settling on the counselor. She returned the smile, though it felt forced on her lips. “Thank you, Doctor,” she replied, her tone polite but distant. “I try my best to lead by example, I am afraid I don’t always hit the mark though.” she said as she reflected on the past few days.

As she took a seat, Iphigenia couldn’t help but feel a twinge of discomfort. Opening up about her feelings wasn’t something that came naturally to her. She preferred to keep her emotions tightly guarded, especially after a mission like the one they had just completed.

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

Naturally, Laural was curious about the remark, but rather than immediately address it, she simply offered with a small smile, “No one can be perfect all the time, not even the Captain. So, what was this mission like from your perspective?”

~Doctor Laural Witley, Counselor

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Iphigenia shifted in her seat, the recent mission pressing on her shoulders like a burden she couldn’t shake off. Doctor Witley’s question pierced through her defenses, and for a moment, she hesitated, grappling with the urge to deflect or conceal her true feelings.
“It was… intense,” she finally admitted, her voice a quiet murmur. “We faced unexpected challenges, and the decisions I had to make… they weren’t easy.”

She paused, her gaze drifting to a point somewhere beyond the counselor’s office, lost in the memories of the mission. The weight of responsibility settled heavily on her, each choice she made echoing in her mind.
“But we completed the mission,” she continued. “We achieved our objectives, even if it came at a cost.”

Iphigenia’s fingers fidgeted with the edge of her uniform sleeve, a nervous reaction she couldn’t seem to shake. She knew she needed to talk about what happened, to unpack the emotions that were beneath the surface, but the words caught in her throat.

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

Laural didn’t need to have education and expertise in psychology and mental health to see Henao was reluctant to open up. At the same time, it was clear she understood the importance of processing events with someone who knew how to support her and also keep things confidential. Still, building trust wasn’t instantaneous.

“Even when we know leadership comes with costs, that knowing doesn’t make dealing with the emotional reality any easier, does it?”

~Doctor Laural Witley, Counselor

Iphigenia nodded slowly, her eyes meeting Doctor Witley’s with a hint of gratitude for understanding, yet also apprehension. Trust wasn’t something she readily handed out, especially when it came to discussing the complexities of her emotions.
“It’s… complicated,” she began, her voice steady but tinged with uncertainty. “As a leader, I have to make decisions for the greater good, even if they weigh heavily on my conscience. But knowing that doesn’t make it any simpler to bear the consequences.”
She paused, searching for the right words to express the emotions within her. It was difficult to articulate the conflicting emotions she grappled with, the pride of accomplishment mingled with the sorrow of loss, the relief of success shadowed by the burden of responsibility.
“It’s… a weight I carry with me, even when the mission is over.”
Iphigenia stood, walked to the window and gaze out of it as she locked she clutched her hands behind her back. The stars glittered in the darkness of space, a silent reminder of the vastness of the universe and the insignificance of her individual struggles. Yet, her choices held immense gravity in that vast expanse, shaping the course of lives and futures.

“I know it’s part of the job,” she continued, her voice soft but resolute. “But sometimes… it feels like too much to bear.”

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

Ruuk pressed with chime to Counselling suite. He would have come sooner, but he found himself putting off.

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

Iphigenia turned at the chime’s sound, her senses alert to the unexpected interruption. However, she welcomed the distraction from the weight of her thoughts.

She took the initiative and invited whoever was outside the door in, “Come in,” she called. As the door slid open, revealing the figure of Lieutenant Ruuk, Iphigenia’s expression softened with recognition. She offered him a nod of acknowledgment, gesturing for him to enter the room.
“Lieutenant Ruuk, you made it,” she said, her voice warm and welcoming as she motioned towards an empty chair. Turning back to Doctor Witley “I really don’t want to make this all about me. I just want to ensure everyone on the away team is okay.”

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

“Thank you, Captain. I hope I’m not intruding?” Ruuk was tired but reassured by the Captain’s kindness.

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

Laural didn’t know what to say at first, surprised by the interruption and the Captain’s invitation of someone else into her office. Ever the professional, however, she rolled with the punches, or in this case, the surprises. “I was just talking with the Captain about her experiences with the away team. We haven’t finished, but I can meet with her another time if she or I are needed elsewhere?”

~Doctor Laural Witley, Counselor

Iphigenia took a deep breath, recognizing Dr. Witney’s reason and thoughts about having Ruuk return at a later time, however she said, “Doctor Witley, I believe having Lieutenant Ruuk here might offer valuable insights. If you don’t mind, I’d like him to stay. It’s unconventional, I know, but his perspective on the mission could help us process what happened.”
She turned to Ruuk, her eyes searching his face for any sign of hesitation or discomfort. “Ruuk, I’d like to hear your thoughts on how the latest mission went. Your experience and role are crucial, and I think it’s important we understand every angle. Please, tell us everything. Your observations, your feelings.

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

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Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

Things that certainly moved in an unexpected direction, but Witley had no reason to deny the Captain the opportunity to hear Ruuk’s account. This debriefing wasn’t just about psychological and emotional processing, but a fact-finding mission in a sense as well.

The counselor gestured for him to enter and make himself comfortable. She too was now curious to hear what he had to say.

~Dr. Laural Witley, Counselor

Ruuk gentle sat down and paused a moment, contemplating his answer to the Captain. He was unsure what to say, but he surmised that the captain would appreciate candor, so that would be the route he opted for.

“I found the away mission… difficult” He said earnestly. “Perhaps it was naive of me to think so, but I had anticipated a straight forward fact finding mission, but things developed so rapidly. I found myself feel unsettled” There was an emphasis on unsettled. Ruuk took great pride in being grounded and calm in his work. To find himself feeling overwhelmed was not a feeling he was accustomed to.

“Perhaps it is my own fault.” he continued. “I have been on so few away missions on my previous posting that perhaps I was not best prepared.

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

Laural’s initial instinct was to reassure the chief engineer his feelings were not a source for judgment. One could assess an opinion or recommendation fairly, but feelings were another matter. Time spent questioning whether they were appropriate would be time wasted.

As much as she wanted to interject, she was reminded there was another person in the room who needed an opportunity to process her own feelings, and that perhaps the two of them together could find something therapeutic in sharing things with one another with limited intervention from Wit.

Laurak turned to the Captain. “Captain, I wonder if you can relate to any of those feelings?” It was a delicate dance they were engaging in. Witley had to facilitate something therapeutically meaningful for both of them while creating a safe space. She would have to let Henao decide for herself how forthcoming and potentially emotionally vulnerable she would allow herself to be. Ideally, rank and position would hold no sway in a therapeutic endeavor, but Laural also wasn’t naïve to the realities that both could play, especially for a commanding officer.

~Dr. Laural Witley, Counselor

Iphigenia took a moment to let Dr. Witley’s question settle in the air, then she said, “Dayner,” she began calling him by his first name, “you’re not alone in feeling this way. The mission tested all of us in ways we hadn’t anticipated. There’s no fault in that. What matters now is how we process and learn from it.”
Iphigenia replayed memories of the mission in her head, the officer that was eaten by the worm, the danger they encountered in that alien terrain, and the sharp twists of events that had caught everyone off guard. She too had felt unsettled, her instincts constantly on edge, her decisions weighed down by the lives depending on her.
“Doctor Witley asked if I could relate to your feelings,” she continued, addressing both Ruuk and the Counselor. “And the answer is, yes, I can. Leading the team, I felt immense pressure to remain composed and decisive, but inside, there were moments when I was just as unsettled as you were. Maybe even more so, knowing the responsibility I carried.”
She paused, searching for the right words to bridge the gap between their experiences. “The uncertainty, the rapid developments, the fear of the unknown or not knowing if we were going to make it back to the Leviathan… These are not easy things to handle, especially in the field. But what we went through wasn’t just a test of our skills; it was a test of our resilience. And it’s okay to admit that it shook us.”

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

Laural was pleased, and internally she would allow herself to admit only to herself, she was also relieved. She was still getting to know the Captain, so she didn’t know entirely what to expect, but Wit found Henao’s response to be as genuine as it was reassuring. “I realize both of you understand what it’s like to carry the weight of leading others and all of the expectations that come with that, including remaining the voice of reason and calm, but I can’t help but notice we seem to be dancing around something here. We’ve used phrases like ‘feeling shaken’ and ‘feeling unsettled,’ but at least in this room, can we call it what it was and admit you were feeling genuine fear?”

~Doctor Laural Witley, Counselor

“Oh, I have no shame in telling you I was terrified!” Ruuk said candidly. “But I feel that a lot of concern is letting the side down.” He continued. “We have a really high functioning crew her aboard the Leviathan, and whilst this carries me and pushes me to do my best for the ship and her crew, I’m very concerned about being the one who drags it down. This was very much on my mind whilst we were on that mission.”

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

Her own memories of the ordeal bubbled up, unbidden and raw. The chaotic swirl of alarms, the tightening grip of anxiety as the unknown stretched before them, and the silent, personal battle to keep composure in the face of overwhelming odds. She had fought to maintain her resolve, to project the strength her team needed, even as doubt gnawed at her core.
Taking a deep breath, she found herself stepping into the conversation, her voice steady but carrying the weight of their shared experience. “Fear is a natural response to what we faced. It isn’t just the physical threats, the danger of the mission itself, but also the pressure to not falter, to not show that fear. We are all deeply committed to our roles, to each other, and to the Leviathan. That bond is a double edged sword and it drives us to excel, but it also amplifies the fear of failure.”
As she spoke, Iphigenia scanned the faces around the table.
“We often talk about resilience,” she continued, “but resilience isn’t about not feeling fear; it’s about feeling it and continuing anyway. It’s about being honest with ourselves and each other about the impact these experiences have on us. I think that’s something we don’t always give ourselves permission to do.”
In the quiet that followed her words, Iphigenia reflected on the invisible burdens they each carried. The fear of letting the team down, of being perceived as weak or incapable, was a silent, pervasive force. And yet, here they were, sharing those fears openly. It was a moment of connection, a reaffirmation of their humanity amidst the rigorous demands of their duty.

Captain Henao
(Commanding Officer)

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Laural nodded to both, but kept her eyes on the Captain for a moment. She couldn’t be entirely sure of course, but it seemed like she was somewhere else in her mind for several beats. Inwardly, Wit’s reservations grew. There was a chance the senior commander was struggling more than she would feel comfortable revealing, and while she seemed forthcoming emotionally, she couldn’t help but wonder if her words were meant to offer reassurances she didn’t entirely feel. Henao was still before a member of her crew, and the role of teacher and consoler in chief was difficult to let go of, no matter how well intended.

“I don’t disagree with anything you’ve offered,” Laural began, referring to Henao, “and I appreciate your openess about what you were thinking and feeling,” she added, referring to Ruuk. “The tendency may be to suppress thoughts and feelings out of fear they will hamper performaance, but I agree, the key is to surrender to them and not beat yourself up for reacting that way. I wonder, though, how do we know when reassuring ourselves and others that reactions are normal is not enough? When do we know how and when to ask for help?”

Ruuk sat in thought a moment before answering. “Well, for me personally that would be when one starts to feel overwhelmed by the situation and when you feel like control of the situation is starting to get away from oneself.” Ruuk resisted the urge to laugh nervously. What he had just described seemed to be his experience an awful lot recently.

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

“Oh?” Laural offered with sincere interest. “Tell me more about that. What sort of contrrol are you talking about?”

~Dr. Laural Witley, Ccounselor

“Well, control of the situation” Ruuk replied. “And to some extent, control of one’s self I suppose.” He answered honestly. “I genuinely fear becoming so overwhelmed that I lose my head and start making the incorrect decision. I know that everyone makes mistakes but when those mistake could get people hurt, or much worse killed… I dread that.”

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

Laural nodded. “Under the circumstances, that is an understandable feeling…I wonder, though, can we ever have true control over situations, meaning what happens outside of us?”

~Dr. Laural Witley, Counselor

Ruuk thought about what had been said a moment before answering. “Well, I suppose we can’t have full control over a situation. But we can certainly influence it.” He answered.

Lieutenant Dayner Ruuk
Chief Engineer/Containment Architect

“Can we always?”Laural asked evenly. She wasn’t trying to be obtuse, but she did believe it was important to help people challenge their assumptions, since he believed thoughts were the major contributors of distress and unhealthy behavior. Thoughts around control, and specifically expectations concerning who or what had it, could certainly drive a lot of distress.

~Doctor Witley, Counselor