Alexandra Garfield sat in the mess hall and stared out the large window to her right. Her tray was filled with a hodgepodge of items that seemed to have been selected haphazardly. None of it was touched including her cup of coffee as she stared into the vast expanse of space. She had found a peace and beauty in the stars mainly because of Chris. Now it just amplified her loneliness.

Her mind was numb and her thoughts muddled which rendered her ability to make a rational choice non-existant. The beginnings of a headache pulsed at the base of her skull. This was not the typical spot for a stress headache to form but without some sort of aspirin or acetaminophen it would erupt into an event more bothersome later. Her eyes scanned the inky blackness searching for a single point: Polaris or more commonly known as the North Star.

Chris has shown her where it was in the night sky a million times yet it was like she had never found it before. Absently her hand crept to her neck as she began to fiddle with her necklace.

The normal dull white noise of the crowded mess hall helped her drown out the buzzing that rang in her ears. She felt dizzy wondering if she would be able to make it back to her quarters without collapsing to the deck plates. Alexandra should have been bouncing off the walls with pure happiness as she mulled over the sickbay results with someone on the other side of the table fretting about every prolonged silence or ache. Instead, she was alone. This was becoming a pattern when Chris popped up in her life. He professed undying love yet the first sign things were not going his way, Robins took off without a hi, bye, or kiss my ass.
Taking a long sp of her coffee Lexi thought back to the last day of the science conference. That was the last day she truly remembered being happy. Everything was right about that day. The sun shone down warm on her exposed arms and bare legs. The smile she wore was one of contented happiness. After all these years, everything had snapped into place. Her Nana always said things turned out how they were supposed to given enough time. Turned out the time was six years. Instead of a dark night with drizzle and the sound of her tears, she was standing for the world to see with the sound of the ocean rolling in wave after wave of different choices and there were a lot of choices to be made. Chris and Lexi could have ended that moment like a fairytale yet as always, it fell apart before it ever got going. Who would have ever thought one day six weeks ago could change your life forever.

There were a few options that wouldn’t require her to drastically alter the course of her life. All but one went against the core of her moral center. Lexi needed a sign from the one person who could help her yet the message carefully typed out on the PaDD next to her wasn’t sent. How could she send it? Chris had made it abundantly clear he wanted nothing more to do with her. Lexi called several times over the past six weeks and not once has he followed up with the promised calls back. This meant she would have to just like when she had to fight to get him to call her after the North Star Cafe. Still, this was not a call she could not make.

Getting up from the table she could not procrastinate any longer. She was actually on a time crunch. Once in her quarters, Lexi decided to call Chris back again. If he didn’t answer it was on him. If he did, Alexandra Garfield had no idea what she would say.

Lt. Alexandre Garfield.