Posted by Captain Kelly Bordeaux (Commanding Officer) in Counseling - Cara’s office

Posted by Lieutenant Cara Esmé O’Farrell (Counselor / Education Specialist) in Counseling - Cara’s office

Posted by Captain Kelly Bordeaux (Commanding Officer) in Counseling - Cara’s office
Posted by… suppressed (4) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Ensign Christine Brown stood at the counselor’s door waiting to be granted entry. Her problem was very personal and there were few people she could talk to about it on the ship. The people and her family that she spoke to about her struggle had vastly different points of view. Since the accident, her life had changed dramatically. Part of her was angry about it. The medical staff could fix everything and anything with a wave of a tricorder except the blank spots in her memory. The spots were small enough not to affect her job performance but large enough that it caused vast canyons in her personal relationships.

Ensign Brown

A woman, wearing a blue medical uniform, with curly bright red hair, green eyes, and classic pale skin marked her as having strong Irish Terran heritage stood in the open doorway. A very strong Irish accent flowed from her, “Hello En Brown. Please come in. I’m Lt O’Farrell. Ya can call me Cara if ya like.” She stepped back from the door. She offered her hand for a firm shake that seemed to put people at ease and make them feel welcome.

Immediately to the left of the door was a desk sitting catty-corner. A variety of places to sit, including a large reinforced couch, and low tables dotted the rest of the open area. The right wall was taken up with a wall to wall, floor to ceiling storage until. Books, various pieces of art, and nick knacks covered the shelves. The office was filled with shades of green and blue, brown and orange. “Help yerself te the replicator and have a seat.” O’Farrell grabbed a glass of tea off her desk and took a seat for herself.

O’Farrell

“I’m fine,” she politely refused the offer of a refreshment. Christine sat down in a chair feeling rather uncomfortable. It was not the counselor. It was the situation. Christine did not feel the need to come here but everyone in her life was clamoring that this was the only place to find a way to live right now. Her medical and prior counseling file would show that two months ago Ensign Brown had a head injury. Medically Brown had recovered fully from the injury and was back to unrestricted work and activities. The only complication was some partial memory loss which seemed to center around her and her finance, John, and her memories for the past 2 years.

“So John wanted me to come talk to you,” she admitted in a neutral tone. “He has been great, really but there are these big chunks I still don’t have remembering things that everyone in the universe keeps saying happened. I don’t doubt them. I see the pictures and videos and know they happened but I don’t remember them. The wedding is coming up in three months and I don’t know where I am at so John suggested I come talk to you.”

Ensign Christine Brown

Memory loss was a hard thing to cope with. For the person and those around them. It made it especially hard for the person when those around them became impatient or hurt over it. It changed the level of intimacy and comfort between people. “What does that mean, ‘ya don’a know where yer at?’” Can ya give me an example?” That would help give Cara a point of reference. Did she mean the ship, the relationship with John, her work, friends, her feelings, or any other number of scenarios.

O’Farrell

“I don’t know what I want but I don’t want to lose what I have,” she spoke in a riddle but it was not on purpose. It was how she felt. “What do you do when you have someone that honors ever vow one would speak in a marriage and you know it to the depth of your soul but can’t remember how you got there?”

Christine Brown

What Christine was saying actually made perfect sense, though it was clear she was frustrated and lost. “What do ya remember of your time with John? Tell me some of your memories ya do remember. Be as descriptive as yer comfortable bein’.” Sometimes repressed memories could be recalled by recalling associated memories in deep sensory detail. It would also give Cara an idea of how much time and experience Christine had lost.

O’Farrell

“That is the problem,” Christine’s frustration was very evident. “I am not sure. When you look at a picture you are in you see the emotions, the scenery, the people in it. You think, yeah I remember that beach and being happy but do you really or are you just accepting what you see. Its like when you look at pictures of yourself before you actually have a memory it it. Say when you are 2 years old or such. You know it happened and you accept you crawled into the bathtub with your clothes on because you see the baby you but you really don’t remember it. You take that image though and joke later that “I crawled into the bathtub with my clothes on but I never would have known that if I didn’t see the picture of it. That is my life. Some things I do remember clearly. Like John and I’s first date from five years ago but don’t ask me about Christmas last year because all I can say is I got a robe and that is because there is a picture of it.”

Christine Brown

“Okay, tell me about yer first date.” It didn’t matter when it happened, it mattered if it was something she was sure she remembered.

O’Farrell