Posted by Lieutenant Commander Faye Calloway (Chief Intelligence Officer) in Faye’s Quarters

Posted by Civilian Marishka (Lounge Host) in Faye’s Quarters

Posted by Lieutenant Commander Faye Calloway (Chief Intelligence Officer) in Faye’s Quarters
Posted by… suppressed (9) by the Post Ghost! 👻
Around 1200, Marishka rang Faye’s chime like a proper guest with little to know agenda.

• Marishka

“Come in,” Faye called out.

Faye’s quarters that she shared with Daggum were two DH quarters combined into one. There was a bedroom, bathroom, living area, office, and small kitchenette. The kitchen area had a two place induction burner, cold storage, and a sink. There was also a closed contraption that looked like a small oven sitting on the counter.

She was sitting on a large couch , with a low table in front flanked by two larger than usual chairs. Along the walls were transparent frames holding old comic books and posters for some of the old Earth bands that Faye loved, like the Clash, David Bowie and The Foo Fighters. On another wall was a somewhat abstract painting of a sea with cliffs. The kitchen area was partially separated by an island with the sink. The door to the left led to the bedroom and bathroom, the door to the right was locked.

The place looked lived in, but overall reasonably tidy. Daggum’s comics were accessible but kept safe, and Faye had her yoga gear stashed in a large sturdy grass basket next to a low shelf with gardening implements in a open tote. There was also a pet bed by the sofa, with food and water bowls near the kitchenette. There was no pet in the bed but as Marishka stepped into the quarters, a fluffy tail appeared belonging to a white and grey long-haired cat. The feline seemed to be studying the newcomer critically, as if decided whether to permit her entrance or not.

“Tess, she’s fine. I invited her,” Faye said with a smirk as she rose from the sofa and set a Padd down to the side. “Don’t mind Tess, she’s very protective.”

~Faye Calloway, CIO

Marishka entered Faye’s quarters and glanced around. She enjoyed the decor and was surprised it was so homey. The modifications were subtle but definitely served a purpose. Glancing down at the small feline she attempted to make her eyes soft, she had been told this was effective but, every cat is different.

“Greetings IlnDoq, if I had known you were here I would have brought proper tribute to pay. Please forgive me, I am not Ferengi and I do not believe in bribes.” Hoping she had made momentary peace with Tess, Marishka crossed the space and sat down on the long couch.

Faye smirked. Tess followed Marishka to the couch and hopped up into Faye’s lap. Faye ran her hand along the cat’s back and tail as Tess settled in.

“It always surprises me how people can turn their quarters into their own refuge. A little slice of whatever they need to make their time on wherever they’re at more bearable. Hello Faye, what do we need to talk about?”

Marishka was trying to be conversational but, there would always be a part of her that wanted to get right to the point. She was the type of person that would probably always be working on balance. It was in her genetics.

• Marishka

Fortunately, Faye tended towards the the blunt automatically and (when she wasn’t being socially awkward) usually just said what was on her mind, even if it was to her own detriment. On the other hand, this was personal and complicated to talk about, so she took a few moments to gather her thoughts. “I owe you an apology and an explanation.”

“The whole episode at the asteroid is…” Faye took a steadying breath. “It’s not the first time I’ve lost it in a situation I wasn’t fully prepared for. It wasn’t about any of you, but about something I am starting to understand better about myself. I told you when you and Dawson and I first had the discussion about how we might all work together that I have some social difficulties. It’s a piece of it, but not the full picture. I don’t know the full of it yet, and I already know my brain works very differently than some, but at the moment I’m in a difficult place where I struggle with situations I can’t predict. And trust me, I can predict a variety of scenarios with a high degree of accuracy. I just wasn’t prepared for how my body and brain would react to the sensory overload of being transported by an unfamiliar method to a place I hadn’t been before. I… freaked out. I couldn’t help it, but it was unprofessional and… I’m sorry.” Her heart was hammering in her chest and Tess nudged her hand with her head. Faye didn’t even look down and just started to pet the cat automatically.

~Faye Calloway, CIO

Marishka listened intently. After Faye had finished speaking Marishka gave a few seconds of silence before she began speaking herself. Over her years of dealing with other species, she had learned such a bit of silence was a good grace period and a thoughtful social interaction.

“The inner workings of one’s own mind can often be the hardest things to understand. I know that from experience, though every experience is different. Thank you for this. I accept and will try to assist you in any way possible, even if that is to take this conversation and keep it completely between us and speak no more of it. Anything you need from me please feel free to ask.”

Marishka wasn’t certain what else to say without letting the moment become awkward. She was certain that neither woman actually wanted the awkwardness though.

• Marishka

Faye processed Marishka’s words and then snorted. “The mind being the hardest… Understatement, there.” She sighed. “I don’t… I don’t know the answer. I’m not even quite sure what it is that I need, other than to not repeat what has happened in previous times in my career, where something happens with me and I become the social pariah.” She focused on steadying her breath and having it match each stroke of Tess’s long fur. “I don’t like talking about my mental health struggles, even though I have learned to do it, but I’ve always known it been more than just that.”

“I’m learning that maybe the things about myself that I thought were just about going through a ton of trauma when I was younger are in fact pieces of my personality and how my brain works. Which is hard because at leat before it was a scenario where I could expect things to get better or go away eventually. But that’s not been the case. I’m just learning to live with these things and figure out how to be a good officer along the way.” Faye looked up at Marishka and smirked. “If you couldn’t tell yet, I make a terrible covert agent unless i’m playing by my own rules. It’s why I’ve liked being in the data and tech side better. Less ambiguity. More structure.”

~Faye Calloway, CIO

Marishka understood that listening was very important in this particular situation. She truly felt she could understand Faye on a certain level. Social pariah, meet black sheep of how many branches of the family? That was the thought running through Marishka’s head but, didn’t really want to get into that story at the moment. Could she? No, maybe not today. She had to open up to say a little bit but, how much?

“From what I understand, our counseling services aboard the Athena are top-notch in the fleet. Since I’m a civilian, I’ve never had to formally set foot in Miss Kingston’s office. Not that I am making a suggestion either way, it’s not my place. I understand that trauma is something everybody has. I could tell you stories and perhaps I will someday soon. For myself, I have learned to take everything I’ve been through and make it a part of myself. Sometimes compartmentalizing works but, sometimes you have to weave it into your tapestry.”

Marishka helped she had stopped before she overstepped or made things awkward.

• Marishka

Faye smirked. “Ahh Dr. Kingston and I are well acquainted, don’t you worry. While therapy is no longer mandated for me, I have come to rely on the insights others give me.” She fell quiet and focused on Tess for a moment.

When she found her words again, she looked at Marishka. “Do you miss it? Active duty, I mean. It’s one thing to hover around the background and help where needed, but it’s not the same as wearing the uniform, or at least owning one, even if your work doesn’t require it most of the time.”

~Faye Calloway, CIO

By this time in her life, Marishka was a pro at keeping her composure. Still, Faye coming straight out with her question was brave of her and caught Marishka a little bit off guard. Perhaps she should have a cat around to pet next time.

“I own many uniforms. Perhaps, even the one you’re thinking of. I even wear them occasionally even if no one is there to see. Some I miss, and some I know I’ll wear again just when people least expect it. I hope that answers your question.”

Marishka had begun to relax a little bit. She hoped Faye would understand that Marishka was an expert dancer as well as a pro at keeping her composure. She would never lie to Faye, or most other people for that matter but, sometimes telling the straight truth could get a person in a lot of trouble.

• Marishka

Faye gazed rather intently at the other woman, attempting to decipher the answer. Did it answer her question? Possibly. She also knew (at least sometimes) when people were side-stepping in a conversation. Faye wasn’t always good at picking that up, or understanding the reason, but it was much easier one-on-one, and in this case, she understood well enough. “It does enough, I guess.”

She ran her hand over Tess’s head. “Some days I have a hard time reconciling my job now with how things had been before. And like I told you when we first had our initial meeting with Dawson, Intelligence and I have a rocky history. I either evolve my career past them, or they will always dictate it. And even them I’m not naive enough to think they won’t always be keeping an eye on me. I’m an unknown. You know how much they hate that.” She smirked. “Though it gives me great joy to think of the ways I can mess with them after I one day retire. Some poor agent will get tasked with keeping tabs on me and I, uh, I will feel it my obligation to keep things interesting for them.”

~Faye Calloway, CIO

Marishka nodded. It was a look of understanding in her eyes now.

“No matter how you dress it up, black on black is black on black isn’t it? You’re right, unknown is not their favorite dance. I have no doubt you would definitely be watched.”

Marishka shifted positions slightly. She hope things were becoming more clear to Faye.

“Trust this fact, most of the people on this ship would probably have a black on black at some point in their life. You may not feel comfortable with everybody here at one time or another but, that’s a statement of fact at least as far as I can tell.”

• Marishka

Faye snorted. “Oh, I’m not worried about everyone liking me, don’t you worry about that. But I do one day hope to be the captain of my own ship, and so I’m trying to figure all this newer stuff out. I know I’m going to be a different kind of captain than people expect, but I think that actually works to my advantage. But I have to get Starfleet Command to agree. We’ll see how that goes,” she said, almost rolling her eyes.

~Faye Calloway, CIO

Marishka couldn’t help but smile at that. This one absolutely had spunk.

“Different is good, different is memorable. I like different. I seek to be different and surround myself with different. Be different Faye it’s a good thing. Don’t let anybody ever stop you.”

• Marishka