Posted by Lieutenant Shock (Chief of Security) in Aliens are alien – Cllr Kingston’s office (Tag: Kingston)

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Janna Kingston (Counsellor) in Aliens are alien – Cllr Kingston’s office (Tag: Kingston)

Posted by Lieutenant Shock (Chief of Security) in Aliens are alien – Cllr Kingston’s office (Tag: Kingston)

(snip)

“There is no need,” replied Shock, understanding that Kingston was correct in her assessment. “I have considered the illogical nature of my experiences, and, I am now convinced that you are correct. That understanding remained part of my subconscious experience all the time, yet, meditation and my usual habits had not helped me arrive conclusively at this matter. I struggle to make sense of my inner experiences lately. I have reviewed my meditative, eating, drinking, and sleeping habits. They remain unchanged. Whenever I speak with either of those colleagues I mentioned earlier, I find myself hesitating, unsure on how to progress in conversation, as if I am acting upon fear or shame – though I am not sure those are emotions I am feeling, as I am actively purging them as soon as I experience them. Yet cognitively, I remain behaviourally controlled by whatever emotions I have purged.”

He paused, content with himself that he had spoken in a way that finally made sense to himself. Just articulating helps. He wished he had friends with whom he could speak. He thought of his older brother (the common Vulcan word for friend being the same as sibling), whom he had not met for twenty or so Earth years. Their obligations and scheduled never allowed for them to be at the same place at the same time.

“Having articulated myself thus, what do you make of what I have said so far?”

– Lt Shock (COS)

Janna considered him for several moments, unhurried in forming her thoughts and words. The silence between them during this time felt easy to her and she felt no compunction to get to speaking. When she did speak, Janna was relaxed and she regarded Shock with understanding. “Growth. Or rather, it is possible that you are facing this particular challenge because it is could be a useful growth point for you. Perhaps instead of seeing how your interactions with these colleagues are difficult, you might gain more from the experiences by seeing them as opportunities to learn. Yes, perhaps about them, but also about yourself.”

She leaned forward. “Often we find ourself triggered in some way with discomfort when we are faced with something that not only challenges us, but mirrors something in us we don’t want to look at. When we overreact to a behaviour from another that disturb our balance, it is sometimes because there is something about it that rings true for us too. They become a mirror or sorts. Shock, this isn’t a bad thing necessarily. It is true that we will not get along with everyone, but it can be a useful exercise to dig a little deeper and examine why we are reacting the way we are. You came to see me because you could not figure it out n your own. But you were looking for external events to explain it all. What if it is internal? What if we are on the edge of a major growth point for ourselves and simply need to work through it by engaging with the thing that makes us uncomfortable. A little like a form of exposure therapy.”

~Janna Kingston, Counsellor

Shock listened carefully to Kingston’s hypotheses. He broke them down.

1. Situations that (a) challenge him, and (b) mirror unconscious processes that he does not (unconscious) wish to introspectively asses can lead to (c) discomfort
2. The situation with Grey and Calloway both were opportunities for Shock to grow psychologically, particularly in the field of mentalization.
3. Situations that (d) disturb his inner balance, can be derived from (e) unwanted (again, unsconscious?) facets of his own personality and being.

Moreover,

1. If Shock assessed these hypotheses introspectively, it may (but no guarantee) lead to less discomfort.

He had tried all other methods of reducing his own discomfort. His usual ways of meditation and self-care did not aid him. They had proven impossible. Now, he did not particularly trust Kingston’s reliability on what he interpreted as unconscious drives within him, but he decided to give it a try. Logic dictated that it might be the the way forward. After all, when you have eliminated all which is impossible, then whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.

Thus, even if he would prove Kingston wrong, it would help him find the truth.

“I am open to exploring and testing your hypotheses,” he said plainly. “How do I do that?”

– Lt Shock

Janna was always patient as people went through the process of working through what she thought of as ‘truth bombs’. Sometimes it was obvious what came next, but sometimes it required more processing to figure out. “Well, you first have to identify the specific aspects that are triggering you. It might be useful, either through meditation, or journalling, or both, to mentally go through the exchanges that you found difficult and try to experience them as an observer. Exactly when are you finding yourself hesitating, or becoming uncertain. When does the conversation start to seem unproductive. What are they saying and doing? What are you saying and doing. Make notes. Now, it might be that you’ll see some commonalities come forth and that will be the aspect we need to look at more deeply. Or perhaps you won’t see it but that is where I can hopefully also help. In either case, I would recommend you try this exercise, more than once if necessary, and then book another appointment with me. We’ll meet and go over your findings and see where that leads us.”

~Janna Kingston, CNS