Posted by Lieutenant Faye Calloway (Mission Specialist) in Captain’s Quarters- If You Can’t Stand the Heat

Posted by Captain Alexander Cochrane (Commanding Officer) in Captain’s Quarters- If You Can’t Stand the Heat

Posted by Lieutenant Faye Calloway (Mission Specialist) in Captain’s Quarters- If You Can’t Stand the Heat

(snip)

It was to her credit, and to their friendship, that Faye allowed her mind to attempt processing his words before she reacted. But nope, the frown wasn’t going to disappear from her face anytime soon it appeared. “I… don’t understand. I don’t know what that means.” At least she was meeting his honesty with her own.

~Faye Calloway

Alex looked at her and took a deep breath. “I’m speaking as your friend, okay. But I am still the Captain of this ship. Every instinct in me tells me that discussing another officer under my command is a truly terrible and wholly unprofessional thing to do… but these are not our typical circumstances, now are they?” and he took a drink. “All I ask is that you not discuss this conversation with anyone. Not Zef, not your mother, certainly not Lieutenant Wyatt… not even your own damn reflection. Do I have your word?”

Learning forward slightly, Faye was utterly serious as she said, “Of course. Absolutely.” She wasn’t sure why exactly, but that declaration made her actually nervous to hear what he was going to say.

Taking a breath… and another drink… he began. “So Mr. Wyatt is… problematic… for me. Especially when it comes to you, but maybe not for the reason you may think.” He looked at her a moment and then said “I’m guessing you know he may have killed you, right?”

Faye nodded. “I’m well aware of what went down while I was on the run.”

“Well… his decision to vent the tubes was an issue for me on many levels. First, it was directly disobeying a direct order. I told him point blank not to do a damn thing that could have hurt you. He did it anyway. When I called him on it later… he defended it by saying the safeguards would have protected you. I had to point out to him that the safeguards no longer applied to you as you were a fugitive and a threat to the ship as far as the computer would have been concerned. That told me he didn’t think his actions through. Now, he and I have had a long talk about this. He chalked it up to him working too hard and then blamed that fact that he didn’t feel ‘welcome’ on the ship… even though he hadn’t done a damn thing himself to try and connect with anyone himself.” and he took a drink and refilled the glass.

She almost interjected with a couple comments but instead Faye stilled that impulse within her and simply refocused on him. She had asked for his opinion and she really wanted to hear it.

“He’s selfish, Faye. You and he getting together confirms that to me. If he actually cared, he would know that now is not the time for this.... especially knowing what has transpired for you over the past week. I’m pretty sure you know it too. Even if you are trying to ‘keep it uncomplicated’, I’d put hard currency on the fact that he isn’t. He wants to be a part of something bigger than himself. And he needs others to justify that want. The man is a good officer, and a more than decent Security Chief. But as a person? I dont trust him as far as I could throw this ship.. He doesn’t see past his own desires… and he damn sure doesn’t think ahead to what the fallout of chasing his desires could be.” He leaned forward and looked at her, an intensity in his eyes.

“He wants what he wants, and damn anything else. He wanted to catch you to prove himself, and could have killed you in the process, but he did what he wanted to make it happen. He wanted to know what was happening with you, and tried to get in your lab against a direct order not to. He is a man who let’s his desires dictate his actions. So what happens when things between the two of you do get complicated? Because they will, Faye. And they will very quickly. Because he will want more. And he’ll want you to give him more. And he will work it so that it happens.”

“And the worst part? I don’t even think he does it out of maliciousness or harmful intent. I dont think he even knows he’s doing it. Thats why I’m not angry with him.. He’s just… I dont know… lost. He started off hiding in his work, but he didn’t find himself there. And now he’s looking for himself in you and everywhere else but in here.” and he put his hand on his heart.

Alex looked at Faye and shook his head slightly. “Faye… I want you to be happy. And I want you to continue on the road you are on to being actually happy. If you can look at me and tell me that Wyatt is absolutely good for you and you have no concerns that being with him won’t blow up and set you both back… then I’ll shut up and never mention it again. But for me? I just don’t see how thats realistic.” He leaned back and took a drink.

“But also… what the hell do I know? I’m a guy who hadn’t had a romantic relationship in years. Should probably just shut my mouth and let you live your life. Like you said, not like I have a say.” and he took yet another drink.

Cochrane

Oh, so many things, so many tiny threads of things that would need to be contemplated later. For sure she was going to replay this conversation over a few times to make sure she understood what he was saying but there were a few pressing things to attend to first. Namely, her friend. Faye offered Alex a small smile, and she didn’t blow up or get angry or storm off. None of that. Instead she felt calm. “Okay, first things first,” she said as she reached out and plucked the bottle away from him, actually setting it on the floor beside her chair. “I don’t think you need anymore of that. I get that my boundaries with alcohol can be mixed, but if I’m not allowed to drown my woes in it, neither are you my friend. And you can fight me for that bottle back but I warn you I’m exceptionally scrappy and I place my odds higher than you might expect,” she said with a wink

She was quiet for a moment as she collected her thoughts together. “I… appreciate how concerned you are. I do get how odd the idea of Luke and I together is. Hell, even I thought it was crazy. It still is. But that is exactly why I’m mindful of my motivations. The upheaval I’m going through is exactly the reason I’m not throwing myself into anything right now. It’s a relationship. Hell, I wouldn’t even go quite so far as to even call it romance.” She reached her hand out and rested it on his. “I don’t think it’s going to be tonight, but at some point I’ll tell you more of my story. But the thing you do have to understand is that I have no trusted in my ability to choose things or people for myself because at one point in my life that was all taken away from me. I had no choice, except whether I lived or tried to die, and how miserable I made things for myself. And yes, I make bad choices at times, and hell, this might be one of them. But for the first time I’m not leaping in unaware. I’m not ignoring my instincts, and I’m not brushing off even my own concerns.” Faye gave a lopsided smirk. “It’s a bit of fun, not a marriage proposal. I think I’ve earned the right to have a little fun after everything. And if his feelings and wants begin to cross my boundaries, I’ve already made it very clear I will end whatever this is. I can’t control what other people do, only what I do.”

~Faye Calloway

Alex looked at her for a moment and then shook his head and drained the rest of his glass.

“You aren’t hearing me, Faye. I trust you can handle it. And I know the second he oversteps… oh, and he will… you will stop whatever it is in its tracks. Its not just you Im worried about you in this. I trust you to err on the side of caution and do what’s best for you.” He leaned back and set both hands flat on the table.

“I’m worried about him, Faye. I dont trust him to do what is best for either of you if it isn’t what he wants. When he invests himself in something, it takes him over. I’ve seen that first hand. And if he hasn’t given himself over to you already, he will soon, and when he makes moves to make you two more than you want and you shut it down, that will wreck him. The man lost his wife and I’d bet my entire career on the fact he is already comparing feelings for you to feelings for her. And thats not fair to you… and really not fair to him. So is your bit of fun worth what it will do to him when its no longer just fun?”

Cochrane