Posted by Cadet Ashlyn Trenton (Security Officer) in Side Sim- Sprucing up the COS Office

Posted by Lieutenant Junior Grade Joseph Rainns (Incoming Chief of Security) in Side Sim- Sprucing up the COS Office

Posted by Cadet Ashlyn Trenton (Security Officer) in Side Sim- Sprucing up the COS Office
Posted by… suppressed (4) by the Post Ghost! 👻
(Snip)

As Cadet McMorran was departing, Cadet Trenton gave her a friendly nod in greeting though she didn’t give much of a facial expression. Allowing the other cadet to depart, she entered the office and took a moment to take in the new decor. The chain of thoughts that went through Trenton’s head forced her to have to stop and take another breath to re-center herself. The topic of making a place your own was another sore subject she would have to deal with later. “Pardon the intrusion sir, I’m here to turn in the evening reports.” In her right hand was a small stack of PaDDs from the night shift cadets. The engineering cadets had decided to play games with the sensors and didn’t care to notify the Security office and as a result, had them running from one end of the ship to the other responding to false alarms. When the source had been found, the cadets were escorted to their rooms, some more physical than others when they tried to resist. This meant all the night shift cadets were exhausted so Trenton volunteered to double-check and turn in the reports for them so they could get a few extra minutes of rest.

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

“Ah yes, thank you Cadet.” Rainns took the padds from Ashlyn and noticed the apparent discomfort in her face. “Is there a problem Ms. Trenton?” The chief of security asks, placing the padds on his desk and taking a seat behind it, he began reading the top padd’s report as he awaited Trenton to respond to the question.

L.T. J.G. Joseph Rainns- COS

Cadet Trenton looked around the office again for a moment, taking another chance to really link each object to the Lieutenant and how it might be significant to him. “Nothing we can’t handle sir.” Trenton reflected over the night’s events, sure everything is in the report but she was too exhausted to stop herself from repeating things already there. “Just a little extra tired, angry at some dumb cadets that tried to fight back, sad that we had to resort to force on our own people, worried about their erratic behavior.” Trenton pinches the bridge of her nose and takes a deep breath in to chase away some of the drowsiness she had been feeling. She lets out a low groan and muttered to herself, “Going to have to deal with this homelessness tonight.” There was a long pause before the cadet realized she said that aloud and would likely now have to deal with it. The cadet’s head sinks as she waits for the Lieutenant’s response.

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton

Rainns had been listening as Trenton talked while reading over the reports. When she stopped talking Rainns looked up. “ Uh two questions cadet, one, who is we? And two, what do you mean about being homeless?” Rainns put the Padd on the table indicating his attention was entirely focused Trenton.

LT JG Joseph Rainns- COS

While she wasn’t looking forward to having to explain the empty feeling that she planned to address later once she got back to her room, she could at least answer the first question with confidence and a little pride. “The Night Watch sir, the cadets assigned to third shift have been training and studying together with the NEs that overwatch us. We’ve built a sense of camaraderie and team cohesion to ensure we can get our patrols and inspections done efficiently and thus have more time for effective learning to better ourselves. Each Cadet’s contribution has been mostly focused on their Major from the academy, in my case that is Information Security and Counter-Intelligence. I was surprised that NE Ma’Toth had taken Xenoarcheology as their major and how much more in-depth their knowledge was compared to what I learned. Even Cadet Ryan held off on the jokes to share his information on Weapons Engineering. In fact, I think you should come to one of our sessions. I’m sure the team would love to share our methods with you.”

((OOC: Blank Space left Intentionally for a response))

The Lieutenant made it clear that he wasn’t going to drop the subject and though she tried to, he brought it back to the conversation at hand. Trenton really didn’t want to share anything this personal with others, but she needed to prove to the ship’s counselor that she could bring herself to trust others in some way and this was probably the best way to do that. Trenton turned and locked the door so as to prevent someone from walking in on their discussion. “This is something I would usually only share with the Counselor, but I’m going to trust that you will not publicize it or use it against me.” Trenton came back to the chair across from the Lieutenant, due to the personal nature of the topic there was no way Trenton would be able to maintain any bearing so she didn’t even try to. She removed her boots and brought her legs up to her chest so she could wrap her arms around them, a defensive posture for a minor sense of safety. “There are a lot of details I can’t talk about because of a gag order, but what I can tell you I will. From the age of twelve, events took place that destroyed my home. From that point, I lived in back alleys, shadows, inactive pipelines, anywhere I could take shelter from the elements. Once I made it to Earth, I lived in facilities with other refugees usually ten to twelve to a room a little larger than your office. There was no way to have a sense of personal ownership of a space and the room assignments were rotated at least once a month. The administrators claimed it was a process to encourage refugees to seek out employment and homes of their own so the facility could be used by the people that needed it most. I couldn’t argue their point so I continued to go along with it until I was able to join Starfleet Academy. I’m sure you remember what dorm life was like so I won’t go into details about the setup. I was still recovering from a lot of my problems and the dorm mates saw my worldview as strange and unwelcome. I found myself continuing to find anywhere to get rest away from them and others to avoid feeling ostracized or bullied. I spent more than half my life without a sense of belonging or a space that I can ‘own’ in a way that I can call home. It’s a strange sort of homesickness because unlike most that can take shore leave to go back to their family and feel at home, I’ve got nowhere to go and no one to go to.”

Trenton takes a moment to let it all sink in then takes a breath and continues. “All these emotions, thoughts, and memories I keep under control by putting them into the box. Before you ask, the box is a form of creative visualization and compartmentalization. I put everything ‘bad’ or ‘distracting’ into the box and each night before lights out I’ll take something out of that box and deal with it as far as I can so I can make constant progress on it. That’s why you will occasionally see a crack because something reminds me of what is in the box and I’ll have to take a moment to re-contain it until I can deal with it later. In this particular case, we have your office. The personalization, the claim of ownership on the space that not only defines you as a person but your place here on the ship. It is a place you belong to. I don’t have that and I want it, but know I can’t have that yet. It sucks, but I’ll get over it. If not this time, then next time perhaps, healing takes time and there is a lot broken.” Ashlyn takes a deep breath before unwrapping herself and putting her boots back on. Taking a second to smooth out her uniform, she started the process of putting herself back together.

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton, Security

Whether it was arrogance or skepticism, Rainns felt that he did not want to sit in on a group of Cadets teaching him skills he had already studied and learned. He did find that this group had formed to be a good sign of Trenton’s ability to work well with others. When he pressed her on her “homeless” comments, he was glad she acquiesced. As she sat in front of him in her bizarre posture he was slightly taken aback. As he listened to her story more than one comment popped into his mind, although he kept quiet and let her finish. As she told him her story, he began to understand that the way that Trenton dealt with pain and discomfort was simply to retreat from it until she was prepared to handle it, a style that he acknowledged had its advantages, but also its cons as well. When she finished Rainns sat for a moment before asking, “Can you not make your quarters a safe place for you to create ownership over?”

L.T. J.G. Joseph Rainns- COS

Trenton shook her head, having spent much of her life living in small spaces like storage closets and unused pipelines she could fit in, even the smallest of quarters were too large for her comfort. “No sir, the quarters are too large for my liking and I understand that there is a standard format to them, but what makes my quarters most uncomfortable is that the locking protocol doesn’t work at the moment. I put in a work order already but they haven’t gotten to it yet. I’ve had two lost cadets walk in already by accident so it’s hard for me to settle there. Additionally, to create that kind of ‘ownership’, I have to have something to put in. Most cadets came with two or three bags and several boxes that were either care packages from family or the things they picked up while at the Academy. I came with a single bag, two off-duty outfits, and toiletries. I don’t have a family for care packages and I was more focused on important things so I didn’t collect the other usual stuff. Additionally, I’d rather save my replicator use for important things like food, emergency medical supplies, replacement uniforms, and the like. Lastly, I have less than six months remaining on this cruise before I’m assigned to another ship to serve while I wait for my application package to Starfleet Intelligence to go through. If it turns out that I’ll be staying on The Challenger for that duration, then I may reconsider this. If not, then there doesn’t seem to be a point. It’s easier to move on if there isn’t anything holding me here.”

Trenton took a long moment to reflect on her response before continuing, “It’s not that I don’t want a place to call home, just that it’s not practical to make one right now. No stability of place or guarantee that I’ll be anywhere for a length of time that will allow making one be worthwhile.”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton, Security

Rainns picked up a padd and punched in a few datapoints and slid it across the desk to Trenton, “I’ve just put priority on your work order, if it isn’t done by this time tomorrow tell me. As for your stay of duration, I promise you that you will feel better if you make at least a small effort to make Challenger a home for yourself. Even if it is only six months, which it may be longer, I think it would behoove you not to make an effort Ms. Trenton.” Rainns leaned back in his chair and put his arms on his lap. “There’s no reason to persecute yourself like that.”

L.T. J.G. Joseph Rainns- COS

Trenton maintained a distant expression as she considered what her department head told her, an idea clearly forming when her eyes lit up. “I think I have an idea, I might be able to manage that.”

• Cadet Ashlyn Trenton, Security

“What would this idea be cadet?” Rainns asked curiously.

LT JG Joseph Rainns- COS